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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: syntaxmachine on March 10, 2013, 05:31:02 PM

Title: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: syntaxmachine on March 10, 2013, 05:31:02 PM
Here's an excerpt from an Al Qaeda application form, a declassified document among the thousands the U.S. military and related organizations have acquired while in Afghanistan (reprinted in a variety of places, e.g., the appendix of The Bin Laden I Know by Peter Bergen):

Objectives of Al Qaeda

-Support God's religion, establishment of Islamic rule and restoration of the Islamic caliphate.

Requirements for joining Al Qaeda

-Abiding by Al Qaeda's rules, its beliefs and objectives.
-Obeying the leader in charge as much as possible, without disobeying Islamic rules.
-No connection between Al Qaeda membership and any other Islamic group.
-Maintain secrecy in work-related issues.
-Physically healthy (except in administrative work).
-The candidate should not be in question when it comes to religious integrity or his morality.
-Reciting the pledge of Al Qaeda.

Vacations

The married have a vacation by rotation for a week every three weeks, and in certain cases Al Qaeda may deny this vacation for four months. A bachelor can have a vacation by rotation for five days every month. Al Qaeda may deny his request for vacation in certain cases.

Requests for vacation travel should be submitted two and a half months before the travel date. The request would only be considered if it had been submitted in a timely manner as indicated, except in special cases.

Salaries and Tickets

-The salary of a married holy warrior is 6,500 Pakistani rupees and 500 rupees for every newborn.
-Salary of the bachelor holy warrior is 1,000 rupee (20 dollars a month)
-The bachelor holy warrior qualifies for a round trip ticket to his country one year after joining the organization. He can take a one month vacation.
-The married holy warrior and his family qualify for round trip tickets to their country of origin after two years, and one month vacation. Tickets cannot be reimbursed if unused.

....

One of the bachelors prepares for his $20 vacation to Karachi after a day's hard work:

Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: syntaxmachine on March 10, 2013, 05:31:49 PM
Bodybuilding related: How would you maintain mass on $20 a month while doing all that cardio in the Afpak mountains?
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: Obvious Gimmick on March 10, 2013, 05:34:35 PM
Week off every three weeks. Not too shabby
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: Method101 on March 10, 2013, 05:44:53 PM
www.allah.com (http://www.meatspin.com)
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: UMPlabs on March 10, 2013, 09:04:13 PM
^ well.... looks like I just got 'meatspinned' for the first time in my life

never thought it was gonna happen

 :-[
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: Method101 on March 11, 2013, 03:18:57 AM
^ well.... looks like I just got 'meatspinned' for the first time in my life

never thought it was gonna happen

 :-[
;D
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: Kwon_2 on March 11, 2013, 03:28:20 AM
Ah Al-Quaida.

So THIS is the Organization True Amateur/The Reformer has been talking about all the time.
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: Tapeworm on March 11, 2013, 04:11:47 AM
Wow.  They're so corporate!
Title: Re: Even Allah's Most Dedicated Servants Need Vacation Time
Post by: littledumbells on March 11, 2013, 05:38:16 AM
Week off every three weeks. Not too shabby

   The lifespan of a suicide bomber is very limited. Al queerda factors that into the equation