Derek
you are fighting a losing battle
That pic makes you look the worst you have looked ever,...I mean your head is nearly as wide as your shoulders, do you even weigh 200 pounds? And ya man, nothing against you, but those tattoos are god awful. You have really made an absolute mess of your life, and you know this, and the only way you compensate for it is by freaking out on people. It's actually quite sad, I wish you would step back and attempt to live a normal life. You are far worse off than I have ever been. And this isnt about money, its about mental health, and you are a disaster.