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Today is the day I become a suicide bomber.


Mohammed Omari:
Brothers and sisters,

It is after a tranquil period of meditation under the light of Allah's love that I acknowledge I have committed the gravest sin in trolling: I have trolled myself. I fell too deep into the game. I became radicalized. Lines were blurred, I lost all sense of reality, and I allowed myself to be fatally irritated by a gammy little gimp RETARD who I would genuinely love to kill.

There can be no coming back from this.

I have thought long and hard about this, I have carried out the Salat al-Tawbah in atonement of my error, and as my last post I now want you all to witness my final, heroic act of jihad. I am, of course, doing the world a favor and taking the pathologically lying, boundlessly ignorant, physically and mentally stunted, yarmulke-wearing, fat little goblin with me.

Think of me fondly. See you on the flip side, nikkas.


Mohammed, are you still with us?

Please post to let us know you are OK. 🙏

I will come back to check on you later today.

- Matt C

Good riddance.

Phantom Spunker:
One less suicide bomber.


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