If you are about to read this and are wearing a hat, take it off and hold it in your hands; if you are not wearing a hat, make believe that you are (your crotch may serve as proxy, but only in front of your mother).
Most Esteemed Gentlemen and Innubile Slags, we have all seen examples of lesser men celebrate their execrable (in)capacities on Getbig, often following their insecurities down the road to selfie-destruction. But not this man. Modesty prohibits Chevalier Hulkotron from boorish boasting because one touched by the charism of nature's abundance has no need for affirmation from ill-bred pygmies, which is how most of you stand in relation to his colossal presence. He is indeed a man for all seasons (except basil), a most uncommon man: a hedgefox, whose amazing exploits are almost equal to his twisting, 3/4 back shot. Know your place and mind your tone.
