I would fight Steven segal

[DanielPaul]

You mean bagels or those dogs with floppy ears?

stand corrected

[polychronopolous]

I'd fight him too, but only because I know he'd just counter my move so fast he'd knock me the fuck out without messing up my pretty face. 

It depends. If it's just the two of you he probably goes in for the quick knockout but if there is a group of people around that MASSIVE ego would kick in and at that point you should expect every Aikido move ever created to be put on your ass for the next half hour or so.  

[Tapeworm]

It depends. If it's just the two of you he probably goes in for the quick knockout but if there is a group of people around that MASSIVE ego would kick in and at that point you should expect every Aikido move ever created to be put on your ass for the next half hour or so.  

Plie, pirouette, brise, etc.  Quelle danseur.

[Tapeworm]

Last Tango in Kyoto is a classic tho.  That scene where he shoves the little Japanese guy's hand up his ass is really disturbing.