What's the Closest You've Come to Death?

[Marlo Stanfield]

jilted lover?

no

[Butterbean]

Moderately funny "close-to-death" story that is kinda "noir-funny".

My little brother and I, like any two boys aged 5 and 2, were always scoping out for candy. That shit rules the world when you're a kid.

Anyways, our "treat" as mom always told us, everyday, was a Flintstone vitamin. We'd get one in the morning. That's about as close as we ever got to candy.

So, one day, mom comes back from the grocery store, and my bro and I know she picked up some flintstones, because we'd just run out. Sure enough, she had. She put them on the top shelf of the cupboard like she always did. But this time, we get the idea that we'll snag 'em. We rig a few chairs, climb the shelves, and grab the bottle.

Then, I get on another chair, grab a knife, and we head downstairs. Tell mom we're going to watch cartoons. She stays upstairs and is gabbing on the phone with a friend. She talks for hours on the phone, so we knew we had some time.

For what seemed like forever, my five-year old ass is downstairs on the couch working that butter knife under the child proof lid (quite ironic), until finally, I pry it off. Mysteriously, without severing a finger.

So my bro and I start munching away. The bottle had 100 flintstones or so, and we ate em all. Now, today, that would be cause for concern, but not "freakout" time. Flintstones are pretty benign these days. But back in the 70s/early 80s, they had Iron in them.

Doesn't take a nutritionist to figure out what comes next.

My bro and I hide the bottle, and go about our merry ways. Meanwhile, we've just set ourselves up for iron poisoning. Late that night, we both start puking and shitting like crazy. Mom thinks we both got the flu, which is pretty common in kids.

The next morning, things are getting worse. We're trying to eat breakfast, and mom goes looking for the flintstones to give us one. We're sick, so kinda makes sense. Except she can't find the bottle. She starts grilling us, and my brother eventually cops, tells her I ate the whole bottle. Then I turn on him, and say he ate the whole bottle. Scene ends with mom freaking out, doing 80mph to the hospital ER.

We both get booked in, sent to the poison center, both diagnosed with acute iron poisoning. Some ulceration in the stomach, and some iron leached into the system. But, it's caught about 12 hours before permanent damage sets in to the liver, and death would have ensued.

Since that day, no more flintstones in the house.

Note to parents: your kids are never safe.

I loled many times as I understand the lure of the Flintstone vitamin.  I'm sorry it was so serious though.  They shouldn't make them so delicious

was on the brink of death.. wont get into too much details because of my job, was poisoned...in hospital for 25 days, fucked me for about a year with PTSD and shit, im strong mentally, overcame that shit without any meds, humbled me, made me stronger,worst year of my life

I believe I had/have PTSD from mine as well and I was only in there days!  Can you say what you were poisoned with?

[Marlo Stanfield]

I loled many times as I understand the lure of the Flintstone vitamin.  I'm sorry it was so serious though.  They shouldn't make them so delicious


I believe I had/have PTSD from mine as well and I was only in there 4 days!  Can you say what you were poisoned with?

I cant elaborate on the situation, not because i wanna sound cool or mysterious,  i just simply cant due to the circumstances, and the state of my job

It was very difficult times for me, im a very strong dude ( talking mentality), nothing ever bothered me, nothing external would ever bother me, so once i was poisoned, and everything happened to me INTERNALLY, i lost control, and was on the brink, i became my own worst enemy mentally... some tough times, they wanted to give me every anti anxiety medication under the sun, i refused it all, reads books, learned relaxation techniques, and overcame it... im talking about going from the deepest and darkest place in my life ( minimum 20 panic attacks a day and contant PTSD/anxiety), to zero panic attacks in like 18 months, and no stress, and living life happily again...

but man, all i can say is i truly dont wish that upon my worst enemy.. it made me a better person though...

[Butterbean]

I cant elaborate on the situation, not because i wanna sound cool or mysterious,  i just simply cant due to the circumstances, and the state of my job

It was very difficult times for me, im a very strong dude ( talking mentality), nothing ever bothered me, nothing external would ever bother me, so once i was poisoned, and everything happened to me INTERNALLY, i lost control, and was on the brink, i became my own worst enemy mentally... some tough times, they wanted to give me every anti anxiety medication under the sun, i refused it all, reads books, learned relaxation techniques, and overcame it... im talking about going from the deepest and darkest place in my life ( minimum 20 panic attacks a day and contant PTSD/anxiety), to zero panic attacks in like 18 months, and no stress, and living life happily again...

but man, all i can say is i truly dont wish that upon my worst enemy.. it made me a better person though...

Sounds horrific.  Glad you got through it!

[The Ugly]

I cant elaborate on the situation, not because i wanna sound cool or mysterious,  i just simply cant due to the circumstances, and the state of my job

It was very difficult times for me, im a very strong dude ( talking mentality), nothing ever bothered me, nothing external would ever bother me, so once i was poisoned, and everything happened to me INTERNALLY, i lost control, and was on the brink, i became my own worst enemy mentally... some tough times, they wanted to give me every anti anxiety medication under the sun, i refused it all, reads books, learned relaxation techniques, and overcame it... im talking about going from the deepest and darkest place in my life ( minimum 20 panic attacks a day and contant PTSD/anxiety), to zero panic attacks in like 18 months, and no stress, and living life happily again..

but man, all i can say is i truly dont wish that upon my worst enemy.. it made me a better person though...

Man, that's horrible.

[Dr Dutch]

I had patients with this kinda thing....very good you made it, dude..

[The Ugly]

I had patients with this kinda thing....very good you made it, dude..

You're a doctor?

[Marlo Stanfield]

I had patients with this kinda thing....very good you made it, dude..

\
Thanks bro,
some times when im free and have nothing to do ( i travel alot) , i sometimes look up support groups and shit in the area, i go there, tell them mystory, show people that there is a light at the end. because during my deepest and darkest hours, i didnt think there was a light...im not shy to tell my story ( as much as im allowed to say), so any chance i get to help, i want to do it, because i can understand  how any man weaker than me might consider suicide..

[bootie]

I GOT SHOT AT FROM ABOUT 15 FT AWAY...MISSED ME WITH 4 SHOTS...HE WAS HOLDING THE GUN GANGSTER STYLE SIDEWAYS AND I HONESTLY THINK THAT SAVED MY ASS...DID I MENTION THAT THE INCIDENT WAS OVER LETTUCE ON A STEAK HOAGIE...INCIDENT HAPPENED AT MY PIZZA SHOP IN THE BURGH...TRUE STORY.

[Marlo Stanfield]

I GOT SHOT AT FROM ABOUT 15 FT AWAY...MISSED ME WITH 4 SHOTS...HE WAS HOLDING THE GUN GANGSTER STYLE SIDEWAYS AND I HONESTLY THINK THAT SAVED MY ASS...DID I MENTION THAT THE INCIDENT WAS OVER LETTUCE ON A STEAK HOAGIE...INCIDENT HAPPENED AT MY PIZZA SHOP IN THE BURGH...TRUE STORY.

Will Grant or Lee Priest ?

[Shockwave]

Will Grant or Lee Priest ?

Different booty bro.
Thats a gimmick.

[Marlo Stanfield]

Different booty bro.
Thats a gimmick.

haha i shouldve know better since this booty didnt flaunt her ass and pussy in the post

[Samourai Pizzacat]

50 years orso.

[#1 Klaus fan]

They shouldn't make them so delicious

Who thought of that? My vitamins taste like shit and I'm happy they do.

[Shockwave]

haha i shouldve know better since this booty didnt flaunt her ass and pussy in the post

Zing!

[sync pulse]

I-45 and Little York...
Houston? If so, I know exactly where that is.

Yes, I am a native...born at St Josephs,...Dad had a barber shop in the Heights...Mom would take me to Foley's downtown,...Would go to the Bolivar Penisula on the ferry,...also Surfside,...Seafood on Southmain,...drive by the Shamrock,...Met James Lovell...Knew his son Jay very well...Met Wernher Von Braun...Studied Electrical Engineering at the University of Houston (didn't finish...big mistake)...learned about weight training from University of Houston coaches...Was on the "Kitirik's Party" show as a child on KTRK TV,...I have a cousin who is an Assistant District Attorney for Harris County...

Mother was born in Schulenburg TX to an immigrant couple from Austria. (had an uncle although born in Texas, spoke English exactly the same way Arnold did when he was fresh off the boat.)  

My Dad was from Groveton TX.

[chaos]

Yes, I am a native...born at St Josephs,...Dad had a barber shop in the Heights...Mom would take me to Foley's downtown,...Would go to the Bolivar Penisula on the ferry,...also Surfside,...Seafood on Southmain,...drive by the Shamrock,...Met James Lovell...Knew his son Jay very well...Met Wernher Von Braun...Studied Electrical Engineering at the University of Houston (didn't finish...big mistake)...learned about weight training from University of Houston coaches...Was on the "Kitirik's Party" show as a child on KTRK TV,...I have a cousin who is an Assistant District Attorney for Harris County...

Mother was born in Schulenburg TX to an immigrant couple from Austria. (had an uncle although born in Texas, spoke English exactly the same way Arnold did when he was fresh off the boat.)  

My Dad was from Groveton TX.

TMI

[sync pulse]

TMI

No...I don't have a TransMandibular Implant...I have had a Chin Advancement Osteotomy...

[orion]

Got all your stories beat, I died in a dream once.

[wes]

\
Thanks bro,
some times when im free and have nothing to do ( i travel alot) , i sometimes look up support groups and shit in the area, i go there, tell them mystory, show people that there is a light at the end. because during my deepest and darkest hours, i didnt think there was a light...im not shy to tell my story ( as much as im allowed to say), so any chance i get to help, i want to do it, because i can understand  how any man weaker than me might consider suicide..

Props bro!

Back in the early 80`s I took over 75 sleeping pills with beer and booze..............never fell asleep, just halucinated for 24 hours.

Saw peoples feet under my door when the door was flush to the floor,killed giant bugs,hands coming around my door,(it was closed),talked to my sister for hours until 5 AM............she wasn`t even in the house,choked a guy on my steps........nobody was there at all.


I had a good mind to write the company and bitch them out about selling an inferior product!!   

Talk about a fucking bad trip!