OK...here we go. There are so many posts that TA and JEZ have started that I will not respond to because they ask the same questions over and over. If I answer in one place another thread will pop up (same topic) and I have to recap the whole thing, this gets tiresome. For the benefit of those who have not read my posts from the last 6 months I will start from the beginning and hopefully give a clear view of who I am, why I am here and explain some of the issues raised about me.
My background:
Born in Omaha, NE I was immediately drawn to sports and wanting to be part of the action. My biggest hurdle when I was younger was my asthma, this really held me back. Many times growing up I would end up in the hospital for as little as one day to more then 5 days because of my asthma-it sucked because I just wanted to be normal, to run without my inhaler, to pet animals at a petting zoo to not worry about being able to breathe. The biggest savior in my life was my passion to be an athlete.
I started running track in 6th grade, I as always a short sprinter and jumper. In junior high when we had to run the mile I couldn't run it under 11 minutes and even at 11 minutes I would end up in the nurses office with an asthma attack-again it sucked. Not until high school did I really start to work on the strength of my lungs and begin to overcome this illness.
My freshman year in high school I did not do a fall sport, I vowed never to run x-country because I hated long-distance and I wasn't a swimmer and had never played V-ball. I was waiting for track and then I got the itch to be a part of something. I really wanted to get in shape for track before the season began but the Winter sports were even less appealing to me., Basketball...NOT my thing, gymnastics-well I am the least flexible person I know and Bowling I didn't consider it a sport that would get me into shape. My options were limited.
At this point a few of my girlfriends decided they were going to be wrestling managers so I went to the meeting with them assuming I would do the same to pass the time before track. At the meeting there were 2 girls who said they were there to join the team...this got me thinking. As a female I had always been strong, arm-wrestling and beating guys in junior high...plus I REALLY did want to participate in a sport not sit on the sidelines. I decided to go for it.
The school had guidelines for this and my mother and I were required to attend roughly 3-4 meeting with various people (principal, athletic director...) sign liability papers and basically try to get talked out of it. I was the only girl who followed through with these meetings, my mother fully supported my decision. Wrestling is probably the hardest thing I have ever done, I have no idea how I made it through 4 years.
The first year was definitely the hardest. The guys didn't like me on their team, the coaches were skeptical and most of my teammates had prior wrestling experience. I wasn't good but I had a big heart and I tried. My asthma was an issue throughout all my years wrestling but every year it got better...and every year I improved. Throughout this experience I did win, I did beat guys and wrestled 3 (maybe 4) girls and beat them all. I'm not sure what my record was though it would be misleading and it would probably be close to 500, especially my senior year I received many forfeits. I wrestled varsity maybe 1-2 times but I was normally on JV. This meant I wrestled many freshman and sophomores-if a coach had a young guy who thought the match could go my way he would many times pull them because it would not be good for a girl to beat a boy and on JV it is easier to pull your wrestlers. In Illinois we had a few very good females who wrestled at 103 on Varsity, Mandy Thompson made it to Sectionals (maybe even State) as did Jenny Zehr.
For those of you who think woman have no place in wrestling I strongly disagree. I wish more high school and colleges had programs for woman-this is a sport about discipline, hard work, patience, strength-there is nothing that I think is harder then facing an opponenet one on one. Also with Title 9 affecting men's wrestling programs throughout the school system having a female counterpart would take this threat away and the teams would support each others status. I am proud to have been a part of the team and after that first year the coaches and my teammates were happy to have me there. I will always be a part of that team and Coach OB's trademark statement will stay with me forever "Good things happen to good people who work hard." These are words to live all areas of your life by, I try to do this everyday.
Back to freshman year-I wrestled got my butt kicked and improved my health. From that year on I have yet to return to the hospital because of my asthma, not to say that it is completely controlled but it no longer holds me back. In the Spring I ran track and had success. Track is what I was passionate about, what I would dream about and what I loved. My coaches informed me that I would be participating in X-Country in the Fall, I tried to fight it but they pushed hard and said if I wanted to be the best that I would have to do it. From that point on I was a three-sport athlete.
JEZ-no I don't want to be a man, I want to take a path less taken. I don't want to always take the easy way and have things given to me. I make choices that are not "mainstream" and I am sorry if this makes you uncomfortable but I am so happy with the way that things in my life have worked out. It could have been much worse. This is who I am, I don't try to hide it.
Onto my lifting and the ongoing discussions on if I am a liar, why I would lie about my lifting, how much I lift, why I won't prove it...
No I am not a liar. I have found that it is much easier to tell the truth then to tell a lie. Am I stronger then many females, yes I also have a very strong work ethic and have been at it for quite awhile. It seems that everytime TA and JEZ question my strength and post pictures they undoubtedly post pictures from my comepetition season last year. Lets go back to last year...I graduated from college and finished my track/sprinting and jumping career-I was lost without training and decided I would train for a marathon.
During marathon training I basically stopped lifting and lost quite a bit of the muscle I had put on throughout the years. I ran the Sunburst Marathon in Indiana in June and had been planning on running the Chicago Marathon with my ex in October. My knees had other plans the running was too much and I was only able to run the last 10 with my ex in the Chicago Marathon. After that I needed to find something that better suited my body-I started looking into Bodybuilding shows. After speaking with trainers at my gym I found out about Figure competitions and decided that was what I would do. There were a few shows in May and I started training Dec-Jan. I really only had 1-2 months to try and regain some of that last muscle before I started dieting. Because of this I was very thin after dieting down...I didn't have enough muscle and my goal for this season was to put on size (especially in my legs).
Last year I competed at roughly 115, maybe a little under that-I got over 140 in my off-season. I ate and trained and ate and trained-I loved it. You question my strength but I was squatting 135 early on in college maybe as easily as high school. It wasn't hard to regain my strength this past year especially when training with other bodybuilders. When I squatted 315 the first time I was scared, I did 275 quite often but that had been my highest, the guys pushed me. I learned to wrap my knees, I bought a belt, I chalked up and I kicked some ass. It was motivating, invigorating and hard as hell. Someone asked why I didn't videotape it, do you normally videotape your workouts? I don't, not to mention no cameras of any kind are allowed in my normal gym.
Why don't I do it right now? Well I have answer this numerous times as well. I have been dieting since February. Since May I have competed in 5 shows, not sure how many of you compete but that is a lot and is extremely hard on your body. Right now I weight approximately 122, I've gained 7 pounds since last year and that is 7 hard earned pounds plus I believe I am slightly leaner this year. Will I lift this heavy again-you betcha but it is not going to happen overnight. My last show of the season is next week in Vegas-then I plan on taking a few weeks off to let my body heal and recover, then I plan on hitting it hard again this year. Unfortunately it looks as though I won't be able to hit it as hard because the judges have stated I am too big for Figure and I will have to tone it down a little if I want to do well. At my dieted down/depleted self I still rep 185 easily and will occasionally do more but at this moment I am just trying to maintain my body and not injure myself.
It is crazy to me that TA and JEZ have become so obsessed with me, actually I take it as a compliment. You won't prove me wrong, especially in this. People who know me well on these boards and in my life know that the thing I hate most is being lied to. I can't stand liars, I understand to make a point in a story some people like to embellish-not me, I like to tell it like it is.
This past year I have worked hard on my body and on the person I am becoming. I have been so fortunate this year-one of my best friends just earned their Pro-Cards, I have made numerous friends with my fellow competitors, I have met great people in the industry who have been willing to help me and believe in me, and my life in this is just beginning. I have made a commitment to myself to not use drugs and hopefully will encourage others to make this choice. It really doesn't matter to me what others choose to do but I want to show others that it can be done the natural way. I don't have big boobs or a perfect face or body but these things do not define me, my mind and my actions and my beliefs are who make me who I am and I am happy with this person. Maybe I will never earn my Pro-Card but I would not give up the experience and people I have met along the way for anything. Thank you to everyone who continues to support me and encourage me, one more week until I will finally be in my off-season
TA and JEZ-I am sorry if I have done something to offend you. The reason I am on these boards is to help others and not degrade them. Training for a show or even dieting for that matter is not easy and I hope that people feel comfortable asking me questions or talking to me about their experiences. Obviously there are competitors who have been at it for years longer then me and I still have a lot to learn but having people on your side is, in my eyes, immensely important. The support I have gotten from the members on this board have helped make my dieting process a little easier and many have helped with my training by helping me correct problems in my physique. Again I am not sure why you have chosen to continually berate and degrade me but if I must be your victim please know that you are wrong in this.