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Author Topic: Jacking off  (Read 6804 times)

Marty Champions

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #25 on: January 21, 2017, 05:51:49 AM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 05:49:21 AM
Similar to my routine except the twice a week sex is because she is a miserable old frigid hag
most women are always miserable
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Irongrip400

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #26 on: January 21, 2017, 06:16:51 AM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 05:45:51 AM
To be honest mate I'd fuck either of them and have a great time doing so but I'd not be happy with them thinking they are attractive in any way shape or form, I'd like them to know they are ugly and have low self esteem

Hahahahaha
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Hack Benchers

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #27 on: January 21, 2017, 06:23:50 AM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 05:49:21 AM
Similar to my routine except the twice a week sex is because she is a miserable old frigid hag
This is getbig GOLD!!!!
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Hack Benchers

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #28 on: January 21, 2017, 06:24:40 AM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 05:49:21 AM
Similar to my routine except the twice a week sex is because she is a miserable old frigid hag
But....does she let you eat crisps INSIDE the house?
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8 INCH not biceps

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #29 on: January 21, 2017, 06:27:25 AM »
I wasn't too much into jerking off but since I got the virtual reality headset I have being jerking off like crazy because it feels so real.
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mass243

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #30 on: January 21, 2017, 06:36:23 AM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 01:40:05 AM
Do those sloppy fat disgusting bitches actually think they look good? Fucking deluded idiots

Hell no.
Women are very self-conscious. Even the hot ones sometimes feel they are ugly and disgusting. Many have talked on this.

Those ugly feminists just present the image of them thinking they are sexy and good just as they are. They do this to piss off people.
That's how they make their living.
 
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Henda

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #31 on: January 21, 2017, 06:51:52 AM »
Quote from: Hack Benchers on January 21, 2017, 06:24:40 AM
But....does she let you eat crisps INSIDE the house?

She's got no choice mate If she dosent like it she knows where the door is
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Henda

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #32 on: January 21, 2017, 06:53:11 AM »
Quote from: mass243 on January 21, 2017, 06:36:23 AM
Hell no.
Women are very self-conscious. Even the hot ones sometimes feel they are ugly and disgusting. Many have talked on this.

Those ugly feminists just present the image of them thinking they are sexy and good just as they are. They do this to piss off people.
That's how they make their living.
 
I hope they cry when looking naked in a full length mirror they thoroughly deserve too
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Desolate

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #33 on: January 21, 2017, 07:25:16 PM »
Quote from: AbrahamG on January 21, 2017, 01:40:20 AM
My dick is harder than the last time I fucked your mother.

My mother would have no use for a wannabe bodybuilder that is juiced to the gills, but still having no muscle and nads the size of raisins. ;D

You're both sad and pathetic. :-*
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Tapeworm

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #34 on: January 21, 2017, 08:36:59 PM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 05:49:21 AM
Similar to my routine except the twice a week sex is because she is a miserable old frigid hag

Giver a nice massage with plenty of oil and candlelight to set the mood and then fist her.  To finish put a foot on her head and jerk off on her diary while talking filthy about her sister.  You'll see a reaction.
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Hack Benchers

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #35 on: January 21, 2017, 10:08:06 PM »
Quote from: Henda on January 21, 2017, 06:51:52 AM
She's got no choice mate If she dosent like it she knows where the door is
You are more of a man than me thats for sure.
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dj181

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #36 on: January 21, 2017, 10:27:37 PM »
Quote from: Tapeworm on January 21, 2017, 08:36:59 PM
Giver a nice massage with plenty of oil and candlelight to set the mood and then fist her.  To finish put a foot on her head and jerk off on her diary while talking filthy about her sister.  You'll see a reaction.

 ;D

you and henda are the funniest dudes on this site
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #37 on: January 21, 2017, 10:51:54 PM »
Quote from: robcguns on January 20, 2017, 06:25:46 PM
I recently turned 40 and I've noticed I jerk off a lot.Im beating it 3-5 times a day and having sex once a day(would have it a lot more if up to me).No test just naturally a horby bastard.Any other guys this horny?Ive never sacked it like this in my life.Had sex 5 times on my bday and still jerked it 3 times that day.

Baiting.  ;)
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #38 on: January 21, 2017, 10:53:37 PM »
Quote from: Zillotch on January 20, 2017, 07:12:10 PM
U have sex on the brain and a lack of self control... what type of mental imagery facilitates ejaculation?

Find yourself wearing Depends a lot lately?  ;D
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #39 on: January 21, 2017, 10:55:08 PM »
Quote from: Matt on January 20, 2017, 07:13:44 PM
In December 2013, the week I turned 32, my sperm count was 830 million.

I am getting another test next week though.  Hoping to crush a billion, but I will be pleased with a total sperm count over 500 million.

This is a good thing since you want more children. Any prospects for a surrogate?
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #40 on: January 21, 2017, 10:57:17 PM »
Quote from: ChopperRider on January 20, 2017, 07:29:08 PM
You've posted your PM to Primemuscle by accident.

You should be more careful about that in the future. Hope this helps.


And the PM was no more impressive than his post here.
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #41 on: January 21, 2017, 10:58:19 PM »
Quote from: robcguns on January 20, 2017, 06:25:46 PM
I recently turned 40 and I've noticed I jerk off a lot.Im beating it 3-5 times a day and having sex once a day(would have it a lot more if up to me).No test just naturally a horby bastard.Any other guys this horny?Ive never sacked it like this in my life.Had sex 5 times on my bday and still jerked it 3 times that day.

Get a job.
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Tapeworm

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #42 on: January 21, 2017, 11:00:04 PM »
Quote from: dj181 on January 21, 2017, 10:27:37 PM
;D

you and henda are the funniest dudes on this site

Thanks.  I appreciate that.  Especially since the gf hasn't seen the lighter side of it yet but at least she doesn't ask me for massages any more or insist I attend family functions.
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Primemuscle

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #43 on: January 21, 2017, 11:00:53 PM »
Quote from: 8 INCH not biceps on January 21, 2017, 06:27:25 AM
I wasn't too much into jerking off but since I got the virtual reality headset I have being jerking off like crazy because it feels so real.

It wasn't real virtual reality before? Weird.
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robcguns

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #44 on: January 22, 2017, 05:45:58 AM »
Quote from: Primemuscle on January 21, 2017, 10:58:19 PM
Get a job.

I own a small construction company and I have a lot of free time.
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Henda

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #45 on: January 22, 2017, 06:00:40 AM »
Quote from: Tapeworm on January 21, 2017, 08:36:59 PM
Giver a nice massage with plenty of oil and candlelight to set the mood and then fist her.  To finish put a foot on her head and jerk off on her diary while talking filthy about her sister.  You'll see a reaction.

Haha can I just skip the candles and massage though?
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dj181

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #46 on: January 22, 2017, 06:05:28 AM »
Quote from: Tapeworm on January 21, 2017, 11:00:04 PM
Thanks.  I appreciate that.  Especially since the gf hasn't seen the lighter side of it yet but at least she doesn't ask me for massages any more or insist I attend family functions.

but does she make you go shopping with her?
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wes

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #47 on: January 22, 2017, 09:31:15 AM »
I just cracked one off!
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Taffin

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #48 on: January 22, 2017, 10:48:26 AM »
Quote from: avxo on January 21, 2017, 01:33:09 AM
It's probably a tumor in your pituitary.

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Joe Pietaro

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Re: Jacking off
« Reply #49 on: January 22, 2017, 07:51:50 PM »
It's tough to go a day without dropping a load, either through self-infliction or with the wife.
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