I agree that abuse happens but... is anyone here old enough to remember the "courage to heal" phenomenon? Everybody and their cousin believed they were abused as children.
A lot of people might take this the wrong way but... My guess is that a lot of perceved abuse is just that, perceived. A lot of people end up in serious reationships with responsibility, children, debt, etc... before being emotionally mature. Feeling abused might have just as much to do with poor self image, immature coping skills, not getting enough attention, fantasy clashing with reality or a million other things.
Abuse does occur but it's dangerous to have too broad of a definition. For example: Should we consider shopping too much a form of abuse? Maybe one spouse accumulates debt because they feel it will prevent the person from ever leaving them. If the breadwinner says no more shopping.... are they being abusive, controlling or just plain responsible?