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Getbig Main Boards => Politics and Political Issues Board => Topic started by: GreatFinn on February 15, 2009, 08:57:35 AM
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Do you guys know why Lenin use always ordinary leather shoes, and Stalin didn't never use anything but boots?
On Lenin's era Russians were only just about ankle deep in shit...
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Oddly enough, I knew the punchline was going to be about stepping in shit. :D
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“What is the duration of the workday in a socialist country?”
“Of course, it's an eight-hour workday: from eight am to eight pm.”
“What is an exchange of opinions?”
“When you walk into your boss's office with your opinion and walk out with his.”
“When Nixon visited Moscow, he and Khrushchev ran around the Kremlin in a race. Nixon came the first. How should our media report on that?”
“The report should be as follows: ‘In the international running competition the General Secretary of the Communist Party took the honorable second place.’ Mister Nixon came in one before last.”
“Will there be the third world war?”
“No, but the struggle for peace will reach such degree that there will be no stone left intact on the earth.”
“Why policemen always walk the streets in teams of three?”
“The partners in the police team are always chosen in such a way that one of them knows how to read, the other how to write, and the third one, naturally, has to keep watch over those two intellectuals.”
"What is the difference between the Constitutions of the USA and USSR?” Both guarantee freedom of speech.”
“Yes, but the Constitution of the USA also guarantees freedom after the speech.”
“Why do we need two central newspapers, Pravda (Truth) and Izvestiya (News) if both are organs of the same Party?”
“Because in Pravda there is no news, and in Izvestiya there is no truth.”
“Is it possible to build socialism in one stand-alone country?”
“It's possible, but better to live in another country.”
“What is permitted and what is prohibited?”
“In England, what is permitted, is permitted, and what is prohibited, is prohibited.
In America everything is permitted except for what is prohibited.
In Germany everything is prohibited except for what is permitted.
In France everything is permitted, even what is prohibited.
In the USSR everything is prohibited, even what is permitted.
“What is the longest joke?”
“The speech made by Khrushchev at the Party congress.”
“Why Solzhenitsyn, Brodsky, Bukovsky, and other dissidents have been exiled from the country?”
“Don't you know that the best products are always selected for export?”
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Do you guys know why Lenin use always ordinary leather shoes, and Stalin didn't never use anything but boots?
Because both of these jews were CHEAP AS SHIT and literally wore the shoes until they fell off, before parting with money to buy new pairs.