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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: Internet Tough Guy on September 02, 2009, 02:29:06 AM

Title: Funny, yet sad
Post by: Internet Tough Guy on September 02, 2009, 02:29:06 AM
Coolio Performs for $3000 and a Bucket of Chicken
Posted Sep 1st 2009 1:15PM by Sharks Comments [49] Print |  Email More
Nineties rapper Coolio has been hired to play a small venue in Colorado for a "$3,000, a bucket of chicken and a bottle of Patron (he likes the Silver variety)" according to the show's booker. The concert will be held on Sept. 6, at "The Deli Zone" a restaurant in Longmont, whose local paper hails the performance as "the city's first celebrity performance in recent memory."

"Where's Longmont at?" Coolio is quoted as saying, in response to being asked by the Longmont Times-Call if he'd ever been to visit the city, which was recently named one of the top 50 places to live by Money Magazine. "My hope is that Coolio is going to give us ... some recognition," said the restaurant's owner, Jeremy King. "I'm hoping to get a cool reputation as a cool place to come see music."

The 'Fantastic Voyage' rapper has had a slippery ride of late, losing his "irreverent" reality parenting show, "Coolio's Rules" and getting publicly groped by an Italian model, amongst other bizarre incidents.

"I'm really excited about the possibility of Longmont becoming a hot spot for music," stated Jimmy Macias, the venue's excited young booker about the upcoming performance. Besides booking the Zone, the 24 year-old is a rapper in a group called 2 Real 4 da Mind (!), who will also open for Coolio.

In other The Zone news, the restaurant has booked Bizzy Bone, of Bone Thugs-N-Harmony to perform on Sept. 19.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: RxBandit on September 02, 2009, 02:43:25 AM
Coolio is not a bodybuilder.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: WillGrant on September 02, 2009, 03:12:29 AM
Coolio is not a bodybuilder.
He is not quite as ugly as Kai but its close
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: LatsMcGee on September 02, 2009, 03:17:21 AM
Nasser will be speaking at this same venue,  he's going to be paid with a bowl of dicks.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: funk51 on September 02, 2009, 12:43:01 PM
what's a coolio, is he related to ll cool jerk.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: PANDAEMONIUM on September 02, 2009, 01:26:20 PM
When I saw "chicken legs" I thought this thread was about "dov" ;D
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: MONSTER_TRICEPS on September 02, 2009, 01:37:07 PM
When I saw "chicken legs" I thought this thread was about "dov" ;D

Hahahahaha, a new victim?
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: brooklynbruiser on September 02, 2009, 03:10:25 PM
Coolio at the Deli Zone review (Aug. 30)
By Marissa Malouff, For the Camera
Posted: 08/31/2009 10:38:00 AM MDT

Coolio

Where: The ZONE, which is the Deli Zone in Longmont with a newly-renovated stage area. The ZONE hosts local shows and open blues nights regularly.

Audience: Longmont loves Coolio. The venue sold all of its 150 tickets last Tuesday. Denver-dwelling Coolio fan Tom McPherson munched on a "Gangstar" sub while waiting through Longmont's STR.

Coolio's nine-song set was a mix of less-than-impressive new songs and mangled versions of old songs. "Fantastic Voyage", began with Coolio pretending as if he was driving a car and ended with him pretending he was crashing one. It was at least entertaining, while the rest of the set left a lot to be desired.

Coolio introduced "Let's Get Stupid" with "My name is Coolio and I am a recovering alcoholic and drug addict". It included the chorus of "Let's Get Stupid and Retarded" (yes, just like the Black Eyed Peas Song) and had absolutely silly lyrics about Grey Goose and drugs.

"Your Boyfriend" included nonsensical rapping from Coolio and a rapper in his posse. His posse seemed to do a majority of the work through out the show, and certainly did most of the work on this track.

The set ended with "an old-school trance", as he put it, of "Get up Get Down" and of course, "Gangsta's Paradise ". The live rendition of the "Dangerous Minds" classic was at times unrecognizable. Instead of having someone sing the chorus, they just played the recorded version and had a saxophone play the hook.

Most of his set, excluding his classics, seemed as if he interchangeably used typical rap lingo and wrote the most formulaic rap songs he could write. His energy was high, maybe because the audience loved him so much, however, no amount of energy could make up for the fact that he was hard to hear and the other rappers in his crew did most of the actual rapping.

Highlights: Coolio's stage banter. He called the audience "alcoholic [four-syllable expletives]" during a strange Michael Jackson tribute. He pretended to get shot at before "Gangsta's Paradise" -- and left between the verses. He had a strange bit where he asked the audience for tacos, Hennessy and gas money. He rapped that there "ain't no party like a Longmont part 'cause a Longmont party don't stop". Well put, sir.

Reminded me of: Nothing I've ever experienced. Hearing that Coolio was playing at a Deli Zone in Longmont was shocking. Coolio selling out a Deli Zone, telling the audience they are alcoholics, and pretending to be shot at during "Gangsta's Paradise" was unbelievable.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: Sir Bigness on September 02, 2009, 05:47:29 PM
Coolio Performs for $3000 and a Bucket of Chicken


Hahahahahahahahahahahaha haha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Hahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: The Showstoppa on September 02, 2009, 05:49:54 PM
haha, I remember when this crackhead got ticked at Weird Al for a parody of Gangsta's Paradise......I guess Weird Al is having the last laugh.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: slaveboy1980 on September 02, 2009, 05:50:59 PM
welcome to the gutter
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: chaos on September 02, 2009, 05:52:18 PM
haha, I remember when this crackhead got ticked at Weird Al for a parody of Gangsta's Paradise......I guess Weird Al is having the last laugh.
Weird Al > Coolio
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: The Showstoppa on September 02, 2009, 05:54:30 PM
Weird Al > Coolio

Maybe Al will let him clean his gutters or detail his ride for him.....
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: drkaje on September 02, 2009, 05:55:00 PM
Since when is a black man liking chicken news?
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: chaos on September 02, 2009, 05:56:14 PM
Since when is a black man liking chicken news?
Racist.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: slaveboy1980 on September 02, 2009, 05:57:27 PM
welcome home coolio.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: theworm on September 02, 2009, 05:59:03 PM
wow

truly pathetic.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: webcake on September 02, 2009, 06:02:31 PM
This article is slightly wrong, he actually performed for $3000 worth of chicken.
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: MB_722 on September 02, 2009, 06:03:26 PM
looking at it with the glass half full.

atleast he's making something legitimately. Atleast he isn't in the news for going on a crack induced rampage robbing people ...

although it is sad it has come to this ;)
Title: Re: Funny, yet sad
Post by: JOHN MATRIX on September 02, 2009, 06:09:01 PM
Nasser will be speaking at this same venue,  he's going to be paid with a bowl of dicks.

hahah