Getbig.com: American Bodybuilding, Fitness and Figure
Getbig Main Boards => General Topics => Topic started by: BayGBM on August 24, 2010, 06:20:36 AM
-
Are your parents still alive? If so, have you thought about how you will manage (emotionally) once they are gone?
If not, how long did it take you to emotionally recover? Do you ever really recover? One friend said his spouse “got me through it” and that he couldn’t have done it without her. Another friend said looking at his own children every day made it possible… but it still hurt after all these years. One said he felt like an orphan once his parents died. Another said even the sun seemed a little dimmer since he lost his mom.
I don’t have many fears, but I confess losing my parents is one fear I live with… because I know it is going to happen and there is nothing one can do about it. I remember when my grandmother died; she was the sweetest woman in my world. It took me about four years to “get over” it and I was just a kid. I can’t imagine going through that again. :'(
I don’t need my parents for financial support, but I can’t imagine life without them. As I get older, more and more of my friends’ parents are dying and each time it happens I can hear the grim reaper in my head saying “you’re next.” :o
-
Many times I have thought I could not overcome X if it happened to me.. turns out humans have an incredible capacity to adapt and survive. My mom passed in 98 and we were close. My Dad is 82 and we are even closer. I will be devestated when he goes but I will survive knowing I spent as much time as I could with him while he was alive and we have many many good memories. I still miss my mom but it isnt as overwhelming as it was in the beginning... So while we think we could never survive if we lost a spouse, child, parent, we do.. "Time heals all wounds" is pretty accurate
-
You learn to deal with it even if it's not totally healed. Lost my father to a cancer 6 years ago. Agnostic is true, humans are resilient. Even when you think you're going to collapse, you find some strength you didn't know about.
-
Many times I have thought I could not overcome X if it happened to me.. turns out humans have an incredible capacity to adapt and survive. My mom passed in 98 and we were close. My Dad is 82 and we are even closer. I will be devestated when he goes but I will survive knowing I spent as much time as I could with him while he was alive and we have many many good memories. I still miss my mom but it isnt as overwhelming as it was in the beginning... So while we think we could never survive if we lost a spouse, child, parent, we do.. "Time heals all wounds" is pretty accurate
He's 82 and you'll be devastated when he dies christ. Stop being such a drama queen, It sucks we have to die, but anyone dieing after age 70 is nothing to get choked up about. It's the natural life cycle, it's said when people loose there parents when there in their mid fifties. I nearly lost my mom to cancer 2 years ago at 46 and my dad 4 years ago at 45, I'm the luckiest mutherfucker alive because it's one in 1000 odds that neither of them is dead and their fine now.
However two of my best friends growing up lost their dads before the end of highschool, another will be dead before he's 50. This is real life anyone after 50 is on borrowed time.
-
Both parents and all 4 grandparents (Epic neither cancer nor heartattack genetics in my family)
-
Lost my mother to cancer 6 years ago.I still think about her and still have dreams with her in them.
she was in so much pain in the end that she was ready to go.she actually asked me if it was ok for her "to let go".I said yes and I've never regretted it.
life sucks sometimes and you just have to deal with it :-\
-
I see where you’re coming from. Losing someone in their 80’s+ seems “appropriate” if I may use that word. I’m always shocked with someone in their 80s+ has a major surgical procedure and manages to come out of it alive. Beyond a certain age (75?) you have to know the person is on borrowed time. :-\
-
serious reply here
You are worried because,like almost everyone else ... spiritually you are infantile. Meaning, there's a really small child within you that stopped growing at a very youg age as your body kept developing.
That child needs nurture and affection "to grow up" just like you did. When that is complete the emotional ties with the biological parents automatically dematerialize.
Until then you will continue to "feel the need" to be "nurtured" by your parents. Normally, your relationship with them should evolve into a friendship as you pass your teen years and become an "adult".
Also, most mindpatterns are defined in the childhood through them as they are the closest to you and you create things you need to correct.
The mindpatterns you have created via your parents, need to be eliminated, and replaced with whatever you desire for yourself. This is why you came into this life.
So: you need to "grow the child within", and eliminate all mindpatterns initiated by your parents, and reflected by others throughout your life.
I'll give you a quick example : you are really small..and your mom abandones you. It can be literally, or as simple as her not being attentive to you right at the moment you needed it. So you created yourself this mindpattern with the scope to learn to correct it. So later on you keep attracting people, parteners, relationships or situations where you feel " abandoned " one way or another. You need to eliminate it first the energetic imprinting at the source, then all the negativity attracted and reflected by others.
etc .. there are many of them.
On the other hand Bay, you need to respect your parents and what they chose to experience in their respective lives, good or bad, and realize that physical death is just a transgression of the soul personality to other realms and experiences. In actuality, desincarnated THEY ARE CLOSER TO YOU THAN EVER and you can contact them at any time. If they consider that it's appropriate, they'll answer depending on what is their focus at that particular time.
They will go when they consider it is TIME for them to go, and you better come to terms with your relationhip before that moment, as it will be harder after, but still doable.
Let me know if you understand this.
-
He's 82 and you'll be devastated when he dies christ. Stop being such a drama queen, It sucks we have to die, but anyone dieing after age 70 is nothing to get choked up about. It's the natural life cycle, it's said when people loose there parents when there in their mid fifties. I nearly lost my mom to cancer 2 years ago at 46 and my dad 4 years ago at 45, I'm the luckiest mutherfucker alive because it's one in 1000 odds that neither of them is dead and their fine now.
However two of my best friends growing up lost their dads before the end of highschool, another will be dead before he's 50. This is real life anyone after 50 is on borrowed time.
yeah, your probably right, I'm just being a drama queen..
-
serious reply here
You are worried because,like almost everyone else ... spiritually you are infantile. Meaning, there's a really small child within you that stopped growing at a very youg age as your body kept developing.
That child needs nurture and affection "to grow up" just like you did. When that is complete the emotional ties with the biological parents automatically dematerialize.
Until then you will continue to "feel the need" to be "nurtured" by your parents. Normally, your relationship with them should evolve into a friendship as you pass your teen years and become an "adult".
Also, most mindpatterns are defined in the childhood through them as they are the closest to you and you create things you need to correct.
The mindpatterns you have created via your parents, need to be eliminated, and replaced with whatever you desire for yourself. This is why you came into this life.
So: you need to "grow the child within", and eliminate all mindpatterns initiated by your parents, and reflected by others throughout your life.
I'll give you a quick example : you are really small..and your mom abandones you. It can be literally, or as simple as her not being attentive to you right at the moment you needed it. So you created yourself this mindpattern with the scope to learn to correct it. So later on you keep attracting people, parteners, relationships or situations where you feel " abandoned " one way or another. You need to eliminate it first the energetic imprinting at the source, then all the negativity attracted and reflected by others.
etc .. there are many of them.
On the other hand Bay, you need to respect your parents and what they chose to experience in their respective lives, good or bad, and realize that physical death is just a transgression of the soul personality to other realms and experiences. In actuality, desincarnated THEY ARE CLOSER TO YOU THAN EVER and you can contact them at any time. If they consider that it's appropriate, they'll answer depending on what is their focus at that particular time.
They will go when they consider it is TIME for them to go, and you better come to terms with your relationhip before that moment, as it will be harder after, but still doable.
Let me know if you understand this.
LMFAO!
-
I take solace is knowing that they were lucky enough to have had me.
-
I take solace is knowing that they were lucky enough to have had me.
spoken like a true getbigger ;)
-
serious reply here
You are worried because,like almost everyone else ... spiritually you are infantile. Meaning, there's a really small child within you that stopped growing at a very youg age as your body kept developing.
That child needs nurture and affection "to grow up" just like you did. When that is complete the emotional ties with the biological parents automatically dematerialize.
Until then you will continue to "feel the need" to be "nurtured" by your parents. Normally, your relationship with them should evolve into a friendship as you pass your teen years and become an "adult".
Also, most mindpatterns are defined in the childhood through them as they are the closest to you and you create things you need to correct.
The mindpatterns you have created via your parents, need to be eliminated, and replaced with whatever you desire for yourself. This is why you came into this life.
So: you need to "grow the child within", and eliminate all mindpatterns initiated by your parents, and reflected by others throughout your life.
this is first post of this guy that is actually true, patrially true at least
the above is good the rest is made up lala land bullshit, the bullshit is actually his way of coping with it as a infantile
anyways you are all infantiles hanging on your parents legs nd terrified of losing them
mommy and daddy crybabies..
good luck :)
-
this is first post of this guy that is actually true, patrially true at least
the above is good the rest is made up lala land bullshit, the bullshit is actually his way of coping with it as a infantile
anyways you are all infantiles hanging on your parents legs nd terrified of losing them
mommy and daddy crybabies..
good luck :)
thank u dr phil ::)
-
(http://www.allmotivated.com/pictures/Demotivational-pictures-internet_Tough_Guys.jpg)
-
yes i know, it is not eazy to be surrounded by so called adults who call mamma every two days
-
this is first post of this guy that is actually true, patrially true at least
the above is good the rest is made up lala land bullshit, the bullshit is actually his way of coping with it as a infantile
anyways you are all infantiles hanging on your parents legs nd terrified of losing them
mommy and daddy crybabies..
good luck :)
Lol he's true that you gotta stop with the infantile. But at some point you gotta take care of your folks and the role gets reversed. If not your selfish or had a shitty upbringing. Sevatese aside from having awful genetics probaly has had to distant himself from his retarted parents.
-
Lol he's true that you gotta stop with the infantile. But at some point you gotta take care of your folks and the role gets reversed. If not your selfish or had a shitty upbringing. Sevatese aside from having awful genetics probaly has had to distant himself from his retarted parents.
;)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs586.snc3/30921_392452418644_611878644_4277670_7213884_n.jpg)(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs202.snc4/38440_414056423644_611878644_4838227_260262_n.jpg)(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs199.ash2/46241_426783213644_611878644_5176772_4793397_n.jpg)(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs054.snc4/35071_412449808644_611878644_4799947_462238_n.jpg)
-
Lol he's true that you gotta stop with the infantile. But at some point you gotta take care of your folks and the role gets reversed. If not your selfish or had a shitty upbringing. Sevatese aside from having awful genetics probaly has had to distant himself from his retarted parents.
Only someone who knows what responsability means knows that. Not sure Sev' got that one.
-
That's the thing about getting older -- much of it is surrounded by loss. Loss of friends who have died or just disappeared along the way, loss of parents, family and other loved ones. My girl and I spoke about this once. Someday, if we live that long, the earth will seem like the loneliest place in the world. This is one reason I feel bad when a man loses his wife or likewise. With old friends and family gone, who else do you have? :-\
Sure you can meet friends along the way, but there's nothing as close to you as the friends you've kept since you were younger.
-
maybe Bay regrets not having children of his own?
now he is an old man looking back on his life
-
in true reality you do not need anyone .. all you need is already inside you ;)
-
That's the thing about getting older -- much of it is surrounded by loss. Loss of friends who have died or just disappeared along the way, loss of parents, family and other loved ones. My girl and I spoke about this once. Someday, if we live that long, the earth will seem like the loneliest place in the world. This is one reason I feel bad when a man loses his wife or likewise. With old friends and family gone, who else do you have? :-\
Sure you can meet friends along the way, but there's nothing as close to you as the friends you've kept since you were younger.
Lol yeah that's why being a self centered prick fails. You gotta have kids and grand kids. I wanna see my grand kids when I die fuck old fuckers who ain't blood.
-
in true reality you do not need anyone .. all you need is already inside you ;)
Spoken like true egotistical man. When you see a loved one dying, you realize one valuable lesson. Whatever that person has done and achieved in his life, the thing left and that comes back to him at that moment is what he has given to others. The rest is insubstantial. Having kids is admitting that the center of gravity of your life can be someone else. It's a great responsability but also a great relief to know that there's someone that you care about more than yourself. Thinking about just your own ass is boring after a while.
-
where do idiots like mortalciol or lundreg come from??
-
where do idiots like mortalciol or lundreg come from??
Lol did your feelings get hurt :-*
My guess is some place not near as awsome as ROMANIA.
-
Lol did your feelings get hurt :-*
My guess is some place not near as awsome as ROMANIA.
you are witty
-
sev is that a pic of your mom with the flower in her hair? damn she's allll right back in the day
-
sev is that a pic of your mom with the flower in her hair? damn she's allll right back in the day
:D
no dude that's my 32 yo sister and my 4 yo nephew ... good genes in my family
my dad's pictured with the trophy ( 65+ national tennis champ at 67 )
-
:D
no dude that's my 32 yo sister and my 4 yo nephew ... good genes in my family
my dad's pictured with the trophy ( 65+ national tennis champ at 67 )
cool good lookin family
-
cool good lookin family
;D
can you imagine mortalcoil posting his pics and his family ? lol
-
Are your parents still alive? If so, have you thought about how you will manage (emotionally) once they are gone?
If not, how long did it take you to emotionally recover? Do you ever really recover? One friend said his spouse “got me through it” and that he couldn’t have done it without her. Another friend said looking at his own children every day made it possible… but it still hurt after all these years. One said he felt like an orphan once his parents died. Another said even the sun seemed a little dimmer since he lost his mom.
My parents were killed in a drunk driving accident when I was a young teen and I have been an orphan ever since . I was an only child and so were they . I got emancipated @ 16 and have supported myself since then . I have been suicidal many times , and addicted to drugs so badly I can't fathom half of what I did then .
I never have been able to get "over " it , I miss them every day and holidays are the worst . I don't dwell on the loss but I never forget it for more than a few hours . You have no idea how many triggers there are during a normal day that are remindful of parents , family , etc.
My father was totally drunk and drove into a concrete barrier @ 65 MPH , there was no signs of braking or swerving to be found . People who drive after they've been drinking are the most selfish stupid people in the world .
I don't think about offing myself anymore , but I wait with anticipation to see them again .
-
:D
no dude that's my 32 yo sister and my 4 yo nephew ... good genes in my family
my dad's pictured with the trophy ( 65+ national tennis champ at 67 )
So does that make her an idiot for having wanted to have a kid?
-
:D
no dude that's my 32 yo sister and my 4 yo nephew ... good genes in my family
my dad's pictured with the trophy ( 65+ national tennis champ at 67 )
That's nice I guess genetics are tricky they sometimes skip a generation.
-
;D
can you imagine mortalcoil posting his pics and his family ? lol
Only an absolute idiot and attention whore with no respect for his own family would post their pictures on the Internet.
-
So does that make her an idiot for having wanted to have a kid?
haha
if you and lundgren would fuck you'd both get pregnant and split the twins one each
is this you ?
(http://cdn.holytaco.com/www/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/thomas_beattie_pregnant_man.jpg)(http://thebeautybrains.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/pregnant-man.jpg)
-
Only an absolute idiot and attention whore with no respect for his own family would post their pictures on the Internet.
lol I obviously am proud of them and respect them ... why wouldn't I ? ;)
you obviously are ashamed of what you or them look like otherwise you'd do the same but are afraid others will ridicule them
-
Sevs sister = nice. Sev = Crackhead.
:D
you're just bitter cause I am straight
-
My parents were killed in a drunk driving accident when I was a young teen and I have been an orphan ever since . I was an only child and so were they . I got emancipated @ 16 and have supported myself since then . I have been suicidal many times , and addicted to drugs so badly I can't fathom half of what I did then .
I never have been able to get "over " it , I miss them every day and holidays are the worst . I don't dwell on the loss but I never forget it for more than a few hours . You have no idea how many triggers there are during a normal day that are remindful of parents , family , etc.
My father was totally drunk and drove into a concrete barrier @ 65 MPH , there was no signs of braking or swerving to be found . People who drive after they've been drinking are the most selfish stupid people in the world .
I don't think about offing myself anymore , but I wait with anticipation to see them again .
holy shit :o :o :o
-
lol I obviously am proud of them and respect them ... why wouldn't I ? ;)
you obviously are ashamed of what you or them look like otherwise you'd do the same but are afraid others will ridicule them
I just know what type of sickos (like you) dwell on the net. And I don't need to post pictures of them to be proud of them. I walk the streets of one of the most famous cities in the world every day with them. I don't hvae your insecurity problems. No need for the approval of internet people to know if i'm worthy or not. I'll live it to third world slumps spawns like you.
-
My parents were killed in a drunk driving accident when I was a young teen and I have been an orphan ever since . I was an only child and so were they . I got emancipated @ 16 and have supported myself since then . I have been suicidal many times , and addicted to drugs so badly I can't fathom half of what I did then .
I never have been able to get "over " it , I miss them every day and holidays are the worst . I don't dwell on the loss but I never forget it for more than a few hours . You have no idea how many triggers there are during a normal day that are remindful of parents , family , etc.
My father was totally drunk and drove into a concrete barrier @ 65 MPH , there was no signs of braking or swerving to be found . People who drive after they've been drinking are the most selfish stupid people in the world .
I don't think about offing myself anymore , but I wait with anticipation to see them again .
I'm sorry to hear about your experience
I'll give you some unsolicited advice
you "chose" that experience to learn how to overcome abandonement
your drinking /drugs period was your attempt to evade your self created reality cause it was too painfull
same with suicid thoughts ( not the best option .. your lessons in nonphysical will be exponentially more difficult than here )
If you really wanna understand what went on and why and what to do to balance yourelf ...PM..me
if not ...good luck anyway
-
I'm sorry to hear about your experience
I'll give you some unsolicited advice
you "chose" that experience to learn how to overcome abandonement
your drinking /drugs period was your attempt to evade your self created reality cause it was too painfull
same with suicid thoughts ( not the best option .. your lessons in nonphysical will be exponentially more difficult than here )
If you really wanna understand what went on and why and what to do to balance yourelf ...PM..me
if not ...good luck anyway
Post of the day. Absofuckinlutely hilarious. I'm gonna piss myself. Got to give it to you, you are one of a kind.
-
I just know what type of sickos (like you) dwell on the net. And I don't need to post pictures of them to be proud of them. I walk the streets of one of the most famous cities in the world every day with them. I don't hvae your insecurity problems. No need for the approval of internet people to know if i'm worthy or not. I'll live it to third world slumps spawns like you.
blah blah
refusal to post a pic = you think u look laughable
even xerses has more balls than u lol
-
My dad is dying slowly from Alzheimer's. I fear he only has maybe another year left before he's completely gone. He lives 12 hours away so I don't get to see him more than 1-2 times a year, which is rough.
I want to have kids some day and I think that's key to keeping some longevity in life. Nothing could be worse than growing old with no kids and single. Luckily I have a great girl.
I often find life depressing as hell and getting older is a horrible curse. What makes it worse is being stuck at a dead end job for years and years of your life. That's a sure way of doubling your aging time.
-
This is not something I like to think about. My parents are still young at 52 and 54 but I'm watching them age before me. Eventually it will happen and I'm sure I'll be different afterwards. My father changed after his father died and his mother has had Alzheimer's for about 15 years. The shit hurts and this fucking thread sucks, I'm out.
-
My mom is still alive. Dad died a couple of years ago. It's been much more difficult dealing with the death of my brother though.
-
Yep.
81 and 72 years old.
-
My parents were killed in a drunk driving accident when I was a young teen and I have been an orphan ever since . I was an only child and so were they . I got emancipated @ 16 and have supported myself since then . I have been suicidal many times , and addicted to drugs so badly I can't fathom half of what I did then .
I never have been able to get "over " it , I miss them every day and holidays are the worst . I don't dwell on the loss but I never forget it for more than a few hours . You have no idea how many triggers there are during a normal day that are remindful of parents , family , etc.
My father was totally drunk and drove into a concrete barrier @ 65 MPH , there was no signs of braking or swerving to be found . People who drive after they've been drinking are the most selfish stupid people in the world .
I don't think about offing myself anymore , but I wait with anticipation to see them again .
I'm so sorry w8m8 :(
{{{{hugs}}}}}
-
mom still alive. father stepped out after I was born then was killed before I was 2.
One thing that still haunts me is when my brother was gunned down in our driveway. I still remember running outside while my sister held him as he moaned both covered in blood that night. I remember it like yesterday.
-
mom still alive. father stepped out after I was born then was killed before I was 2.
One thing that still haunts me is when my brother was gunned down in our driveway. I still remember running outside while my sister held him as he moaned both covered in blood that night. I remember it like yesterday.
Sounds like a nice neighbourhood you live in.
-
Two things about parents passing;
One: If you are laid off from your job and you are providing 1000 to 1500 dollars a month to keep an infirm mother in decent assisted living (in addition to her social security)...nothing will break you financially faster or more assuredly...to add insult to injury...not one cent was deductible,...not even the 4,400 dollars worth of dental work she needed.
Two: My mother when she had her health, was emotionally abusive to me to the EXTREME even as an adult...When I was a minor child she emotionally abused me to a point just short of suicide EVERY DAY. (Other kids never came over because they feared her) But you will forget what she did temporarily as you concentrate on how in the world you can keep this up,...then she passes...and as time goes by you forget her infirmity, and you start to remember just what an asshole she was to you, and you get bitter and angry.
My experience...
-
Two things about parents passing;
One: If you are laid off from your job and you are providing 1000 to 1500 dollars a month to keep an infirm mother in decent assisted living (in addition to her social security)...nothing will break you financially faster or more assuredly...to add insult to injury...not one cent was deductible,...not even the 4,400 dollars worth of dental work she needed.
Two: My mother when she had her health, was emotionally abusive to me to the EXTREME even as an adult...When I was a minor child she emotionally abused me to a point just short of suicide EVERY DAY. (Other kids never came over because they feared her) But you will forget what she did temporarily as you concentrate on how in the world you can keep this up,...then she passes...and as time goes by you forget her infirmity, and you start to remember just what an asshole she was to you, and you get bitter and angry.
My experience...
:( Is she still alive?
-
Two things about parents passing;
One: If you are laid off from your job and you are providing 1000 to 1500 dollars a month to keep an infirm mother in decent assisted living (in addition to her social security)...nothing will break you financially faster or more assuredly...to add insult to injury...not one cent was deductible,...not even the 4,400 dollars worth of dental work she needed.
Two: My mother when she had her health, was emotionally abusive to me to the EXTREME even as an adult...When I was a minor child she emotionally abused me to a point just short of suicide EVERY DAY. (Other kids never came over because they feared her) But you will forget what she did temporarily as you concentrate on how in the world you can keep this up,...then she passes...and as time goes by you forget her infirmity, and you start to remember just what an asshole she was to you, and you get bitter and angry.
My experience...
I think you are a better man than I... IF my mother was abusive to me to the extreme to the point I contemplated suicide every day, I don't think I would have paid a dime...
-
:( Is she still alive?
She passed July 1, 2009 5:47 pm...
-
mom still alive. father stepped out after I was born then was killed before I was 2.
One thing that still haunts me is when my brother was gunned down in our driveway. I still remember running outside while my sister held him as he moaned both covered in blood that night. I remember it like yesterday.
That's rough. Sounds like Boyz in the Hood.
-
I lost my father 24 years ago and still have a hard time with it.
-
serious reply here
You are worried because,like almost everyone else ... spiritually you are infantile. Meaning, there's a really small child within you that stopped growing at a very youg age as your body kept developing.
That child needs nurture and affection "to grow up" just like you did. When that is complete the emotional ties with the biological parents automatically dematerialize.
Until then you will continue to "feel the need" to be "nurtured" by your parents. Normally, your relationship with them should evolve into a friendship as you pass your teen years and become an "adult".
Also, most mindpatterns are defined in the childhood through them as they are the closest to you and you create things you need to correct.
The mindpatterns you have created via your parents, need to be eliminated, and replaced with whatever you desire for yourself. This is why you came into this life.
So: you need to "grow the child within", and eliminate all mindpatterns initiated by your parents, and reflected by others throughout your life.
I'll give you a quick example : you are really small..and your mom abandones you. It can be literally, or as simple as her not being attentive to you right at the moment you needed it. So you created yourself this mindpattern with the scope to learn to correct it. So later on you keep attracting people, parteners, relationships or situations where you feel " abandoned " one way or another. You need to eliminate it first the energetic imprinting at the source, then all the negativity attracted and reflected by others.
etc .. there are many of them.
On the other hand Bay, you need to respect your parents and what they chose to experience in their respective lives, good or bad, and realize that physical death is just a transgression of the soul personality to other realms and experiences. In actuality, desincarnated THEY ARE CLOSER TO YOU THAN EVER and you can contact them at any time. If they consider that it's appropriate, they'll answer depending on what is their focus at that particular time.
They will go when they consider it is TIME for them to go, and you better come to terms with your relationhip before that moment, as it will be harder after, but still doable.
Let me know if you understand this.
great post!
-
Both dead and they did not write Beethoven`s Ninth Symphony. >:(
Death smiles at us all, all we can do is smile back. :)
-
Both dead and they did not write Beethoven`s Ninth Symphony. >:(
Death smiles at us all, all we can do is smile back. :)
But were you entertained? ;D
-
But were you entertained? ;D
Of course!
Afterall,
I`m just here for the food.
-
Are your parents still alive? If so, have you thought about how you will manage (emotionally) once they are gone?
If not, how long did it take you to emotionally recover? Do you ever really recover? One friend said his spouse “got me through it” and that he couldn’t have done it without her. Another friend said looking at his own children every day made it possible… but it still hurt after all these years. One said he felt like an orphan once his parents died. Another said even the sun seemed a little dimmer since he lost his mom.
I don’t have many fears, but I confess losing my parents is one fear I live with… because I know it is going to happen and there is nothing one can do about it. I remember when my grandmother died; she was the sweetest woman in my world. It took me about four years to “get over” it and I was just a kid. I can’t imagine going through that again. :'(
I don’t need my parents for financial support, but I can’t imagine life without them. As I get older, more and more of my friends’ parents are dying and each time it happens I can hear the grim reaper in my head saying “you’re next.” :o
Yes,my parents are still alive.. I think about their health often,and it worries me.. They're in their 70's. My parents helped me out so much,and believe,if they weren't as tough on me as they were ,i would not be here,or have as much as i have.. My mother and father own their own business,and made me work long hrs.to help keep things going.. I hit my teens and rebelled..My parents left me to do what I wanted,left me to make my own choices... I got my girlfriend(now wife)pregnant.. I moved in with my mom in law(passed last wk.p.i.p.).. My mom was disappointed,and told me ,a real man does the right thing and does what he needs to do to provide for his family..So I started working for my family again.. Just made enough to pay for formula, diapers,and train fare.. Mom paid for college(in full). I graduated,and mom told me she had been putting money in a bank account from the 1st check until now! That was the money I used (20yrs.ago) to purchase my 1st home and start my own business.. Wether my parents did this for me or not...I owe them everything.. I worked for scraps(so I thought),but did what I needed to do to feed and clothe my child,and help my family out,and in the end,I received the best gift,one could have prayed for.. I learned to work hard and never complain love,honor and be loyal to those that are loyal to me.. Sorry for the long post,but we're talking about Mommy and daddy..!?
-
Of course!
Afterall,
I`m just here for the food.
'I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.' - K. Vonnegut :)
-
'I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.' - K. Vonnegut :)
[When Vonnegut tells his wife he's going out to buy an envelope] Oh, she says, well, you're not a poor man. You know, why don't you go online and buy a hundred envelopes and put them in the closet? And so I pretend not to hear her. And go out to get an envelope because I'm going to have a hell of a good time in the process of buying one envelope. I meet a lot of people. And, see some great looking babes. And a fire engine goes by. And I give them the thumbs up. And, and ask a woman what kind of dog that is. And, and I don't know. The moral of the story is, is we're here on Earth to fart around. And, of course, the computers will do us out of that. And, what the computer people don't realize, or they don't care, is we're dancing animals. You know, we love to move around. And, we're not supposed to dance at all anymore.
-
Yes,my parents are still alive.. I think about their health often,and it worries me.. They're in their 70's. My parents helped me out so much,and believe,if they weren't as tough on me as they were ,i would not be here,or have as much as i have.. My mother and father own their own business,and made me work long hrs.to help keep things going.. I hit my teens and rebelled..My parents left me to do what I wanted,left me to make my own choices... I got my girlfriend(now wife)pregnant.. I moved in with my mom in law(passed last wk.p.i.p.).. My mom was disappointed,and told me ,a real man does the right thing and does what he needs to do to provide for his family..So I started working for my family again.. Just made enough to pay for formula, diapers,and train fare.. Mom paid for college(in full). I graduated,and mom told me she had been putting money in a bank account from the 1st check until now! That was the money I used (20yrs.ago) to purchase my 1st home and start my own business.. Wether my parents did this for me or not...I owe them everything.. I worked for scraps(so I thought),but did what I needed to do to feed and clothe my child,and help my family out,and in the end,I received the best gift,one could have prayed for.. I learned to work hard and never complain love,honor and be loyal to those that are loyal to me.. Sorry for the long post,but we're talking about Mommy and daddy..!?
This, that is highlighted, is what good parents do for their children
-
Sounds like a nice neighbourhood you live in.
wasn't the best....and this was a step up moving from the Projects.
-
wasn't the best....and this was a step up moving from the Projects.
What, in your best estimation, caused your extreme poverty? I am curious as to how this came to be.
-
What, in your best estimation, caused your extreme poverty? I am curious as to how this came to be.
There was no cause. It was my starting point (the way I see it)....and I never once felt I lived in poverty b/c of how I was brought up.
poverty (imo) was not extreme(not even close). I was always told to be grateful no matter what....there are always people a lot worse off (third world countries..etc) therefore I never felt I lived in TRUE poverty. I was taught as long as you had food, shelter, clothes on your back you are miles ahead of others who don't.
-
There was no cause. It was my starting point (the way I see it)....and I never once felt I lived in poverty b/c of how I was brought up.
poverty (imo) was not extreme(not even close). I was always told to be grateful no matter what....there are always people a lot worse off (third world countries..etc) therefore I never felt I lived in TRUE poverty. I was taught as long as you had food, shelter, clothes on your back you are miles ahead of others who don't.
And that's the majority on this planet. Just came back from Africa. Talk about poor.
-
That's rough. Sounds like Boyz in the Hood.
Yes, it does. It happens daily in our streets of america. I recall the detective said to my mom..you see it on the news and tv, but it doesn't hit home until it's one of your own and you are the news that day.
-
And that's the majority on this planet. Just came back from Africa. Talk about poor.
Yes. It's pretty rough over there. When I was in the service, I saw first hand what true poverty was. It put everything I was taught to believe in perspective.
-
This, that is highlighted, is what good parents do for their children
I agree,and appreciate them.. So scared to lose them.. Even now,when thing's get a little funky for me,I call mommy,and she still knows what to say to make my boo boo go away.. LOL! We never went on Vacations,or parks.. We worked all the time. But had dinner together everyday. Mom hated owing,she busted her ass and saved her money,every cent! Paid for her house,and factory as quick as she got the money... My sister passed early in life,and my mom took my nephew in and raised him. My mom is awesome!
-
He's 82 and you'll be devastated when he dies christ. Stop being such a drama queen, It sucks we have to die, but anyone dieing after age 70 is nothing to get choked up about. It's the natural life cycle, it's said when people loose there parents when there in their mid fifties. I nearly lost my mom to cancer 2 years ago at 46 and my dad 4 years ago at 45, I'm the luckiest mutherfucker alive because it's one in 1000 odds that neither of them is dead and their fine now.
However two of my best friends growing up lost their dads before the end of highschool, another will be dead before he's 50. This is real life anyone after 50 is on borrowed time.
Sewer rat might taste like pumpkin pie but if you were forced to eat it, it would still fuck with your head.
-
An addendum to my mother passing;
In the days just before she died she lay in her death bed staring at the ceiling as if watching or seeing something. She would speak as if she was seeing someone or something. Sometimes using a proper name. The nurse said, 'She's talking to people that have passed on,...I see this all the time."
In the few hours before she died she called out some names, her brother, my dad, and several other relatives...and she called out, " Where are you taking me?"...She passed a couple of hours later without saying anything further...
-
My mom is awesome!
:)
An addendum to my mother passing;
In the days just before she died she lay in her death bed staring at the ceiling as if watching or seeing something. She would speak as if she was seeing someone or something. Sometimes using a proper name. The nurse said, 'She's talking to people that have passed on,...I see this all the time."
In the few hours before she died she called out some names, her brother, my dad, and several other relatives...and she called out, " Where are you taking me?"...She passed a couple of hours later without saying anything further...
Wow! I've heard stories like this too.
-
Since last looking at this thread 2 weeks ago my a family friend died at 55, on sundaymorning. He got sick and died 6 days after being admitted to hospital. Almost ironic considering my views on anyone after 55 being fair game.
-
Losing one's parents is hard.
My father and I had no relationship. The last time I saw him, I was seven years old. He never tried to contact me. When I was grown and married with children I called him in Chicago where he lived. He told me I had the wrong number. I knew I didn't.
When he died of stomach cancer in the hospital when he was sixty-one years old, which happened not too many years after my calling him, he listed his sister as next of kin. She was on vacation in Australia. The police where I lived in Portland came to my home to tell me he'd died. It seems he kept all the Christmas cards I'd sent him over the years and this is how they got my address. I didn't go back to Chicago for his funeral. I still wish that I had.
My stepdad, who I loved, died in the West Los Angeles V.A. hospital of lung cancer with no warning when he was 64. He was a very practical man, he didn't want any fanfare surrounding his passing and his wishes were granted. I wish I’d been there to say goodbye. My sisters were with him.
After my stepdad died, my mother moved to Oregon to live with my family and me. She was dying from emphysema. She lived with us most of the time for three years. She was always a difficult person to live with and her grave illness didn’t change that.
Although, she was in and out of the hospital several times, she managed to travel to New York by car with her longtime lover twice. On the second trip they got married and went to France to see my uncle. On the trip back to the states she was so ill, she was taken off the plane on a gurney, loaded into an ambulance and taken directly to the hospital.
As I did with her first trip east, I flew to NY to drive her home to Oregon in her car. There were times when I’d look over at her skinny body and fluid filled legs and think she’d died, right there in the car next to me on I-80. She hadn’t.
After a hospital stay and a short stay in a nursing home, she came back to our house for a couple of months. Then she went back into the hospital. The night she died, I visited her and told her that she couldn’t smoke when she came home because she’d be on oxygen. I guess she didn’t relish that idea so she died. She was 61 years old. She smoked as many as five packs of cigarettes a day up until the day she died.
Phillip Morris sent advertisements to our home for several years until I contacted them and told them they they’d already killed her.
Love her or hate her, I think about her more often than not.
-
Are your parents still alive? If so, have you thought about how you will manage (emotionally) once they are gone?
If not, how long did it take you to emotionally recover? Do you ever really recover?
Depends how they go, I think. My mom went comparatively slowly, as in: 9 months from start to finish. That gives everyone plenty of time to sort out their emotional shit. It was made easier by the fact that she took it like a trooper. Couldn't get euthanized, so she starved herself to death. Up until she slipped into a coma she was like her normal self: upbeat, realistic. So did I recover? Yes, quite quickly. My father took a lot longer, but eventually did too. I was probably much quicker because I suddenly had to take care of him and my little sister because my father broke down (and then his business did too).
I don’t have many fears, but I confess losing my parents is one fear I live with… because I know it is going to happen and there is nothing one can do about it. I remember when my grandmother died; she was the sweetest woman in my world. It took me about four years to “get over” it and I was just a kid. I can’t imagine going through that again. :'(
It gets easier the more it happens around you. Take my word for it. Just make sure you have no regrets. Don't procrastinate, because any day could be the last together. If you want to tell them something, good or bad, then do it now. And in that same vein: don't idolize them. There's a Dutch saying which roughly translates as "nothing bad about the dead". Beware of that. Don't suddenly place them on a pedestal after they die. That makes it harder to deal with, because you are making yourself deal with the loss of perfection. And nobody is perfect, so you shouldn't burden yourself with an unrealistic image to live up to. I loved my mom, but she had her asshole side too. Don't ever forget to keep things in perspective.
I don’t need my parents for financial support, but I can’t imagine life without them. As I get older, more and more of my friends’ parents are dying and each time it happens I can hear the grim reaper in my head saying “you’re next.” :o
"We have nothing to fear, besides fear itself." Get as much as possible out of the relationship while you still can, and don't end up with regrets. That's the best anyone can do.
-
Depends how they go, I think. My mom went comparatively slowly, as in: 9 months from start to finish. That gives everyone plenty of time to sort out their emotional shit. It was made easier by the fact that she took it like a trooper. Couldn't get euthanized, so she starved herself to death. Up until she slipped into a coma she was like her normal self: upbeat, realistic. So did I recover? Yes, quite quickly. My father took a lot longer, but eventually did too. I was probably much quicker because I suddenly had to take care of him and my little sister because my father broke down (and then his business did too).
It gets easier the more it happens around you. Take my word for it. Just make sure you have no regrets. Don't procrastinate, because any day could be the last together. If you want to tell them something, good or bad, then do it now. And in that same vein: don't idolize them. There's a Dutch saying which roughly translates as "nothing bad about the dead". Beware of that. Don't suddenly place them on a pedestal after they die. That makes it harder to deal with, because you are making yourself deal with the loss of perfection. And nobody is perfect, so you shouldn't burden yourself with an unrealistic image to live up to. I loved my mom, but she had her asshole side too. Don't ever forget to keep things in perspective.
"We have nothing to fear, besides fear itself." Get as much as possible out of the relationship while you still can, and don't end up with regrets. That's the best anyone can do.
All good words. Thanks for sharing. :)
-
An addendum to my mother passing;
In the days just before she died she lay in her death bed staring at the ceiling as if watching or seeing something. She would speak as if she was seeing someone or something. Sometimes using a proper name. The nurse said, 'She's talking to people that have passed on,...I see this all the time."
In the few hours before she died she called out some names, her brother, my dad, and several other relatives...and she called out, " Where are you taking me?"...She passed a couple of hours later without saying anything further...
My mom in law(love her dearly),passed a few wks.back.. Pancreatic Cancer? It was so quick.. She came to New York for some Dr. appointments.. She and my wife had talked over the phone,and she (mom in law)complained about stomache pains,and a bloated belly as well. So,she comes down,we have dinner on Saturday,the next Saturaday,she was rushed to the hospital ,the next Saturday she passed.. When I visited her I just broke down.. I couldn't take seeing her like that.. She was calling out to her brothers and sisters(that passed). I couldn't get myself to touch her in the casket.. I love her so much.. When I had nowhere to go,she took me in,no questions asked.. My daughter was born,and she told me,a father needs to be with his child and wife.. It's still fresh...My wife still cries almost every other day.. Her mother was a great woman,and I hope she's resting in peace..
-
my great grand parent is still both alive they 96 and 94yo
-
Funerals:
The mortuary business is quite lucrative...the most expensive part of a funeral is "viewing the body"...if you want to display the body in a casket the process of preparing the body for display is expensive...the stage for the display is expensive...the flowers and casket...the room. My sister made the arrangements for my mother and she opted for cremation with the sarcophagus holding the ashes displayed next to a formal photo portrait my mother had made when she was alive...thousands less expensive.
-
My mom in law(love her dearly),passed a few wks.back.. Pancreatic Cancer? It was so quick.. She came to New York for some Dr. appointments.. She and my wife had talked over the phone,and she (mom in law)complained about stomache pains,and a bloated belly as well. So,she comes down,we have dinner on Saturday,the next Saturaday,she was rushed to the hospital ,the next Saturday she passed.. When I visited her I just broke down.. I couldn't take seeing her like that.. She was calling out to her brothers and sisters(that passed). I couldn't get myself to touch her in the casket.. I love her so much.. When I had nowhere to go,she took me in,no questions asked.. My daughter was born,and she told me,a father needs to be with his child and wife.. It's still fresh...My wife still cries almost every other day.. Her mother was a great woman,and I hope she's resting in peace..
Probably Steroids or Insulin, hence the bloated Belly. Oh, well — she wasn't going
to write Beethoven's Ninth Symphony anyway.
-
Funerals:
The mortuary business is quite lucrative...the most expensive part of a funeral is "viewing the body"...if you want to display the body in a casket the process of preparing the body for display is expensive...the stage for the display is expensive...the flowers and casket...the room. My sister made the arrangements for my mother and she opted for cremation with the sarcophagus holding the ashes displayed next to a formal photo portrait my mother had made when she was alive...thousands less expensive.
Why do any of this? Who cares about dead bodies? I sure don`t.
-
Lost my dad 13 years ago. He was my best friend. I still miss him.
My mom is a stud. Walks every day. She's in better shape than me. :) The thing I worry about is that whole "end of an era" thing when she dies. It's going to be a sad day.
-
Probably Steroids or Insulin, hence the bloated Belly. Oh, well — she wasn't going
to write Beethoven's Ninth Symphony anyway.
You're a b!tch for trying to joke about this! When your whore of a mother had cancer I wished her well...
-
You're a b!tch for trying to joke about this! When your whore of a mother had cancer I wished her well...
Hey I mean no harm. Just trying to put a smile on the face of death. Afterall, that is all you can do when it comes at you. Don`t let it own you.
-
haha
if you and lundgren would fuck you'd both get pregnant and split the twins one each
is this you ?
(http://cdn.holytaco.com/www/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/thomas_beattie_pregnant_man.jpg)(http://thebeautybrains.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/pregnant-man.jpg)
The one on the left was a model in Hawaii and worked at Gold's on Kapiolani. She was very pretty and very shy. I remember seeing that news show on her and it showed her. I couldn't believe it