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Getbig Main Boards => General Topics => Topic started by: Army of One on March 20, 2011, 06:41:09 PM
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Never had any interest in having kids, much rather live on my time, just read this article and even though written by a woman I found it interesting.Ive met very few guys that say they want kids, seems to me its always pressure by the woman and then they have to accept it.I would imagine the average Getbigger also has no interest in children?
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Why I don't want children
Polly Vernon
The Observer, Sunday 8 February 2009
Guess what I don't want? Babies. I never have and I never will. Please don't tell me I'll change my mind. It's patronising, and how the hell do you know anyway?
I denounced motherhood when I was young. Seven or so. My earliest thought on the matter was my earliest thought on babies altogether and it went: isn't it all a bit - vulgar? It has become more and more pronounced as I've got older. All the stuff that was supposed to make me reconsider has happened to me; and I haven't. Advanced age (I am 37), falling in love, peer pressure from breeding friends... So, no, I don't want babies.
Why don't I want babies? I'll ignore for a moment the insolence of the question. I'll ignore the fact that nobody ever asks a woman who wants kids why she wants kids; no one ever tells a woman who expresses a deep-rooted compulsion to procreate that she'll change her mind. Instead, I'll say: for lots of reasons. It's not that I am a power-crazed career bitch. I mean - I am; but that's unrelated. I didn't want babies long before that madness kicked in - the no-baby policy has facilitated it, but hasn't compounded it.
And it's not that I don't like babies. I am ambivalent towards them. I am like your average bloke in that I don't especially want to cuddle or touch or smell them, though I'll do it out of politeness. (Well, maybe not the smelling. And, I have to say I find those women who throw themselves at any baby, whether or not they know it or its parents, perplexing. It's unseemly, isn't it? Like throwing yourself at a man?) I adore my goddaughter, but I can take or leave all other small people.
I really don't like what parenthood does to grown-ups. This latest generation of parents - oh, it's odd, isn't it? I like the ones I know. Mostly. They're OK, because they're my friends - I chose them, they are by definition better than those parents I don't know. (Even if they aren't - I know for a fact that they were better, once, back before they had children, and I reckon they'll resume something approaching normal service once the buggers have gone to school. Won't they?) But modern parents en masse? That pampering cult of Bugaboo-wielding, Mumsnet-bothering dullness?
Spare me. Spare me the one-track conversations. Spare me the self-righteousness, the sense of entitlement (you, with the toddler-on-wheels: astonishing news just in! You don't have pavement priority over the rest of the world!). Spare me the pretensions of martyrdom and selflessness. (It's my experience that parenthood doesn't make anyone less selfish. Humans simply extend the sphere of their selfishness when they have kids, so that it embraces the kids and dishes out a fierce battering to the rest of the world. Also - no one has a baby out of selflessness. You really want to be selfless? Adopt, lover.) And please spare me the pitying glances (I promise I don't want what you have. Honestly, I find it mind-boggling that you don't want what I have. Are you quite sure you're not poleaxed with jealousy?). While I always offer pregnant women my seat on the Tube, on my darkest days I also find myself thinking: let's get something straight here. Your condition is self-inflicted, you made the choice to get knocked up, and you presumably knew it'd leave you incapacitated in this way. I don't know if you deserve my seat any more than you would if you were incapacitated by a banging hangover, say, or a great deal of shopping.
So part of the reason I don't want babies is because I don't want to transform into one of them. There are quite enough of them out there, already.
There are other reasons. I like my lifestyle, my career, my body, my capacity to run off to New York at short notice if the opportunity arises. I like that my money is my own to squander. I like that my weekends can be slept away, or drunk away, or read away; that I am not sleep deprived, or if I am, I can remedy that easily. I like how last-minute my time is, how disorganised, how guilt-free.
I really, really like how certain I am about this. It's probably the only thing I never fret over. I never wonder if I'm making the right decision in remaining childless. And you know what? Screw the rational arguments, the truth of why I don't want babies - the only thing I ever really need to say is this: because I don't.
Mine is not an easy position to maintain. Partly because our society won't have it. Partly because our popular culture denies it. The great big emotional drama of my entire generation - infertility and all its attendant horrors, IVF, endless tests, artificial hormones, the prospect of a childless future - does not touch me. Everyone I know is caught up in this nightmare in some way. I am miserable for my friends with fertility issues, of course, for my friends who desperately want families. They're so, so sad about it. At the same time, I do have to stop myself going: "Seriously?" every time they cry on my shoulder. As for me, I have to constantly deal with the suggestion that I am wrong, or abnormal, or damaged because I do not want the very thing that everyone else wants so desperately. How perverse of me. How contrary. How (someone actually said this to me recently) not normal.
It doesn't help that fertility is the great cultural preoccupation of the day.
While TV and film scriptwriters and commercial novelists have given up
flogging the idea that marriage and monogamy will save us, they now seem extremely attached to the idea that motherhood will save us.
Even the cool films perpetuate this new romantic ideal: Juno, Knocked Up, Baby Mama... Today's rom coms end on maternity wards; five years ago they ended at the right end of a church aisle. The iconography of happy endings is no longer flouncy white dresses and engagement rings - it's blue lines on pregnancy test kits and outward-bulging tummies. In this world my not wanting babies is shorthand for my not wanting to be happy. How perverse of me. How contrary. Et cetera.
Am I going to have a ghastly awakening 10 years down the line? Am I going to get bludgeoned over the head by the realisation that my life is empty, meaningless and loveless and I'm staring into the crevasse of a lonely old age? Maybe. And then maybe not.
But you know what? I'm not going to start breeding now, just in case. No bloody way. Because - do you know what I don't want? What I really don't want? Babies. That's what."
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/feb/08/motherhood-children-babies1
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the ultimate irony is that the guy who wrote this dissertation on not having kids seems like a responsible enough person that he would have well mannered and productive offspring while the people who are multiplying like rabbits are total idiots
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the ultimate irony is that the guy who wrote this dissertation on not having kids seems like a responsible enough person that he would have well mannered and productive offspring while the people who are multiplying like rabbits are total idiots
A woman wrote it, but yes agreed on other points.
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A woman wrote it, but yes agreed on other points.
she's obviously not a spainish chick
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Your alarm clock will go off around 30-35 and not stop sounding until your mid 50's...
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ZERO interest whatsoever and Jezebelle also has ZERO interest whatsoever.
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It's common for kids NOT to want kids. When you get older things change...you start believing in God and worrying about death...
ALWAYS GIVE 100....POSITIVE PERCENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ive got 3 kids and dont want anymore
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the ultimate irony is that the guy who wrote this dissertation on not having kids seems like a responsible enough person that he would have well mannered and productive offspring while the people who are multiplying like rabbits are total idiots
Lulz.
There should be a test required for reproduction. You dont pass, you get neutered.
Like Uberman says, the retards will take over... they keep breeding, smart people dont want kids... its only a matter of time.
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ive got 3 kids and dont want anymore
:o
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Lulz.
There should be a test required for reproduction. You dont pass, you get neutered.
Like Uberman says, the retards will take over... they keep breeding, smart people dont want kids... its only a matter of time.
uberman is just ripped that off of that luke wilson movie about dumb people in the future
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uberman is just ripped that off of that luke wilson movie about dumb people in the future
Wherever he got it, he has a point. :-\
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Children are disgusting.
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Children are disgusting.
You do realize if your parents felt the same way, you wouldnt exist, right?
I know youre trolling like you always do, and to not want kids is one thing, but disgusting? Many kids from shitty parents are, yes, but well behaved children from families that know how to discipline I wouldnt really classify as disgusting.
Epic lolz.
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You do realize if your parents felt the same way, you wouldnt exist, right?
I know youre trolling like you always do, and to not want kids is one thing, but disgusting? Many kids from shitty parents are, yes, but well behaved children from families that know how to discipline I wouldnt really classify as disgusting.
Epic lolz.
I realise that and Id have no problem not existing, I never get how people can be self important when none of us mean jack shit in the grand scheme of things, we are no better than the ants in our gardens.
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I realise that and Id have no problem not existing, I never get how people can be self important when none of us mean jack shit in the grand scheme of things, we are no better than the ants in our gardens.
This is truth, still Im rather glad my parents didnt share that attitude, it has nothing to do with self importance and everything to do with the fact that I enjoy existance. (and sex) ;D
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ZERO interest whatsoever and Jezebelle also has ZERO interest whatsoever.
might have something to do with how they'd end up looking like
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The author's pic screams b-i-t-c-h.
Sorry, couldn't get past the first few paragraphs.
(http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2007/11/22/polly_vernon_140x140.jpg)
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You do realize if your parents felt the same way, you wouldnt exist, right?
I know youre trolling like you always do, and to not want kids is one thing, but disgusting? Many kids from shitty parents are, yes, but well behaved children from families that know how to discipline I wouldnt really classify as disgusting.
Epic lolz.
You do realize that is a stupid point to consider because if they thought that way, I wouldn`t even be typing this sentence. And yes, kids are disgusting as I find them to be repulsive. Once they are about 12 or 13 they are somewhat tolerable, but they still are horrible.
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My current thought on this is that its a more or less natural drive, and although i haven't read the article above myself I suspect it is lengthy reasoning to explain something which is actually much simpler: lack of innate desire to reproduce that others normally have.
No point in arguing over something that you 'feel'; its like arguing with a homosexual how he could possibly like other guys and then writing a 1000 word essay on why its a bad idea to go tdongz on another guy.
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I have it from a good source that children are the orgasm of life
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You do realize that is a stupid point to consider because if they thought that way, I wouldn`t even be typing this sentence. And yes, kids are disgusting as I find them to be repulsive. Once they are about 12 or 13 they are somewhat tolerable, but they still are horrible.
Exactly my point.
The only reason people exist is to reproduce. Its all well and good to not want kids, but the bottom line is peoples basic instinct is to reproduce.
Exactly why people of low IQ are constantly reproducing and are outpopulating intelligent people rather quickly.
Its ironic that people are becoming so smart that the idea of having kids and giving up their own pursuits is going to be the end of there breed.
Becoming so smart that they simply discontinue breeding. Intelligence overriding basic instict to reproduce.
Irony. I wonder what Darwin would say about that? Evidently intelligence winds up being counterproductive to species survival.
Hahahaha.
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Exactly my point.
The only reason people exist is to reproduce. Its all well and good to not want kids, but the bottom line is peoples basic instinct is to reproduce.
Exactly why people of low IQ are constantly reproducing and are outpopulating intelligent people rather quickly.
Its ironic that people are becoming so smart that the idea of having kids and giving up their own pursuits is going to be the end of there breed.
Becoming so smart that they simply discontinue breeding.
Irony. I wonder what Darwin would say about that?
Hahahaha.
Darwin would probably be too busy beating off shemale midget porn to ponder it in our current age.
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Darwin would probably be too busy beating off shemale midget porn to ponder it in our current age.
Hahaha.
Much truth to that.
Brazilian fart porn maybe?
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ZERO interest whatsoever and Jezebelle also has ZERO interest whatsoever.
low test levels on your part and high test levels on hers.
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I've never wanted a girlfriend,wife or kids ,I was 28 years old when I met my wife (my first girlfriend) after finding the right person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with ,having a kid was as natural as taking a shit ,I hope this helps ( no homo )
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No point in arguing over something that you 'feel'; its like arguing with a homosexual how he could possibly like other guys and then writing a 1000 word essay on why its a bad idea to go tdongz on another guy.
Spot on.
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I've never wanted a girlfriend,wife or kids ,I was 28 years old when I met my wife (my first girlfriend) after finding the right person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with ,having a kid was as natural as taking a shit ,I hope this helps ( no homo )
Che, will you have sons that will dominate in the "World Cup"?? 8) 8)
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There is something inherently broken with someone who doesn't EVER want a child. It is a basic human drive to continue the species even if someone absolutely hates children and the lifestyle that it entails.
That being said, and having an unexpected child myself two months ago, I can relate in some respect to everything she said. I never liked kids or being around them. I hate the sounds of screaming and the smell of shit. I also didn't know how much I would hate the smell of baby formula. The lifestyle itself is also lame. Less of everything that a normal person likes (free time, freedom, space, money, sex, etc.) will never have a positive impact on a persons life. There are benefits, however, and some possess the ability to appreciate them more so than someone like myself. Some people absolutely LIVE for children and that is fine. I still find most people like that to be annoying and mediocre at best.
The only thing I can say as of right now is these few facts:
The author, aside from being technically correct in this instance, is clearly an embodiment of most things I have come to hate in modern females (and society for that matter).
I love and adore my child.
I hate the lifestyle of being a parent.
I made the choice to play roulette with my penis because I loathe the idea of condoms, I live for the feeling of blowing my load into her hot snatch, and I knew that my girlfriend and I love each other and would be great parents and would make a great kid.
He was unplanned and I accept that knowing what the life of a parent is I would never 'plan' to have a child so having him this was was my way of ensuring that we could be two of those people who SHOULD be unleashing our offspring on the earth versus all the moronic wastes of human garbage currently pumping out little criminals and selfish brats intentionally. All of this despite never wanting less of the things that make most normal people (especially Getbiggers) happy.
Kids are the way of the species, no way around it.
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I've never wanted a girlfriend,wife or kids ,I was 28 years old when I met my wife (my first girlfriend) after finding the right person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with ,having a kid was as natural as taking a shit ,I hope this helps ( no homo )
Ive found this too, but we have yet to have the kid.
Ironic that my wife is also my 1st serious GF, all the other women I couldnt stand being around for any length of time, let alone be in a relationship with.
Then again I hooked up with/hung around a lot of dirty sluts before I met my wife. :-\
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Che, will you have sons that will dominate in the "World Cup"?? 8) 8)
I doubt it ,my kid is smart as fuck but he sucks at sports :'(
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There is something inherently broken with someone who doesn't EVER want a child. It is a basic human drive to continue the species even if someone absolutely hates children and the lifestyle that it entails.
That being said, and having an unexpected child myself two months ago, I can relate in some respect to everything she said. I never liked kids or being around them. I hate the sounds of screaming and the smell of shit. I also didn't know how much I would hate the smell of baby formula. The lifestyle itself is also lame. Less of everything that a normal person likes (free time, freedom, space, money, sex, etc.) will never have a positive impact on a persons life. There are benefits, however, and some possess the ability to appreciate them more so than someone like myself. Some people absolutely LIVE for children and that is fine. I still find most people like that to be annoying and mediocre at best.
The only thing I can say as of right now is these few facts:
The author, aside from being technically correct in this instance, is clearly an embodiment of most things I have come to hate in modern females (and society for that matter).
I love and adore my child.
I hate the lifestyle of being a parent.
I made the choice to play roulette with my penis because I loathe the idea of condoms, I live for the feeling of blowing my load into her hot snatch, and I knew that my girlfriend and I love each other and would be great parents and would make a great kid.
He was unplanned and I accept that knowing what the life of a parent is I would never 'plan' to have a child so having him this was was my way of ensuring that we could be two of those people who SHOULD be unleashing our offspring on the earth versus all the moronic wastes of human garbage currently pumping out little criminals and selfish brats intentionally. All of this despite never wanting less of the things that make most normal people (especially Getbiggers) happy.
Kids are the way of the species, no way around it.
We have a saying in the uk "one in the bum, no harm done"
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people who dont want children should apply their rethoric to themselves and kill themselves if they had balls and were strictly following their own nihilistic principles.
If you dont want life, if you dont want to feel the "will" to live, then you can only choose the path of death. Everything else is hypocrisy.
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We have a saying in the uk "one in the bum, no harm done"
it is by the grace of god how true that statement is. if a girl is letting some guy blow it in her butthole she is likely not the kind of girl who needs to be pumping out little monsters. win win!!!
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people who dont want children should apply their rethoric to themselves and kill themselves if they had balls and were following their own nihilistic principles further.
If you dont want life, if you dont want to feel the "will" to live, then you can only choose the path of death.
Dont you think thats selfish on those who care about you?
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I doubt it ,my kid is smart as fuck but he sucks at sports :'(
You already have one? Well, kick his ass and make him work at it harder. ;) If i had a kid, and he sucked at sports, i would still like him, but love him..... :-\ :-\
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Ironic that my wife is also my 1st serious GF, all the other women I couldnt stand being around for any length of time, let alone be in a relationship with.
Haha ,same here
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IMO, people that don't want kids just don't want their lives to change or get disrupted. Glad to be a father and spending time with my daughter!
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read Kant, Schopenhauer.
/End of thread.
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NOT WANTING KIDS IS TELLING EVERYONE,,,I DONT WANT TO LIVE NO MORE,,,ITS NATURAL SELECTION AT ITS BEST WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,,,DARWIN WILL SAY THE SAME THING,,,,YOU WANT NO KIDS THEN YOU DONT WANT TO LIVE YOU SAY GOODEBYE
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NOT WANTING KIDS IS TELLING EVERYONE,,,I DONT WANT TO LIVE NO MORE,,,ITS NATURAL SELECTION AT ITS BEST WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,,,DARWIN WILL SAY THE SAME THING,,,,YOU WANT NO KIDS THEN YOU DONT WANT TO LIVE YOU SAY GOODEBYE
I disagree .
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I disagree .
ITS HUMAN NATURE FELLA,,,you just dont know what your saying right now because you so superficial you want toys,,,you want games,,you are generation nothingness thats why,,if you dont have any distractions then you will want kids,,,its natural to want kids,,to keep the you genectics going from beyond your time,,,
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I have it from a good source that children are the orgasm of life
horly shit LOL
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I have it from a good source that children are the living result of my orgasm.
fixed
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I've never wanted a girlfriend,wife or kids ,I was 28 years old when I met my wife (my first girlfriend) after finding the right person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with ,having a kid was as natural as taking a shit ,I hope this helps ( no homo )
28 year old virgin? ???
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(http://babysimpson.co.uk/info/leaflets/8f10.jpg)
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fixed
you obviously didn't get the joke you dick face
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28 year old virgin? ???
Sad isn't it ? :'(
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you obviously didn't get the joke you dick face
hey hey there sunshine.. i got it. i just happen to like my joke better.
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Sad isn't it ? :'(
its better than cathcing your first STD at 11 and not knowing how to spell like me
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Sad isn't it ? :'(
im kind of mixed up now, but aren't you that really buff guy that posted pictures of your amazing, sexy ass girl friend?
???
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anyone who doesn't like to have babies just imagine if your father thought the same way!!..
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im kind of mixed up now, but aren't you that really buff guy that posted pictures of your amazing, sexy ass girl friend?
???
Nah,: I think you've got me confused with someone else.
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I think it's horribly selfish on a number of levels to guilt someone into having children they do not want.
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Nah,: I think you've got me confused with someone else.
oh, i thought you were XFACTOR for some reason lol
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Having children is the Key to keeping your bloodline into slavery in this dimension.
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I'm a Christian guy who doesn't want kids, and I'm looking for a like-minded believer. I'm actually in contact with a pretty hot lady from New Hampshire who's not a breeder either. Miracles do happen.
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Never had any interest in having kids, much rather live on my time, just read this article and even though written by a woman I found it interesting.Ive met very few guys that say they want kids, seems to me its always pressure by the woman and then they have to accept it.I would imagine the average Getbigger also has no interest in children?
Opposite with me. My wife didn't want kids; I wanted kids but never pushed the issue. Years later she changed her mind and she was the one asking. No plans for another right now with all of the freaking doom going on in the world.
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Would love to have kids, but not enough dough to make their life as first class as possible - so no offspring.
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NOT WANTING KIDS IS TELLING EVERYONE,,,I DONT WANT TO LIVE NO MORE,,,ITS NATURAL SELECTION AT ITS BEST WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,,,DARWIN WILL SAY THE SAME THING,,,,YOU WANT NO KIDS THEN YOU DONT WANT TO LIVE YOU SAY GOODEBYE
How does not wanting kids mean that someone doesn't want to live any more?
Do you think you will be somehow conscious in the lives of your children when you are dead?
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Children are disgusting.
That is an homossexual thought... not saying you are gay.
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NOT WANTING KIDS IS TELLING EVERYONE,,,I DONT WANT TO LIVE NO MORE,,,ITS NATURAL SELECTION AT ITS BEST WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,,,DARWIN WILL SAY THE SAME THING,,,,YOU WANT NO KIDS THEN YOU DONT WANT TO LIVE YOU SAY GOODEBYE
Earth is a slave planet. Always has been, always will be. Having kids keeps YOU enslaved to this planet. Not having kids free's you from this planet.
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Earth is a slave planet. Always has been, always will be. Having kids keeps YOU enslaved to this planet. Not having kids free's you from this planet.
WHere do we go when we are free?
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A woman wrote it, but yes agreed on other points.
Bottom line, that bitch is bitter and crazy and if the right dude came along, she'd be preggers. I've seen and talked women just like her...attention on them 24/7...kids take energy, time, and attention away from the person...Basically, she's ego stroking...
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Bottom line, that bitch is bitter and crazy and if the right dude came along, she'd be preggers. I've seen and talked women just like her...attention on them 24/7...kids take energy, time, and attention away from the person...Basically, she's ego stroking...
Pay attention to this statement right here people.