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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: MoralMan on June 09, 2016, 04:43:08 AM
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So in days 1-6 God made the heavens and sea and sky and what have you. Then this is what gets me, it says "On the seventh day God rested."
Now is nt God this perfect, omnipotent being, who is eternal? Why did he rest? Surely some perfect being doesn't need to rest? To say he rested suggests he is somehow even partly mortal as things need to rest when their mind and muscles are tired, hence need to recuperate.
Well?
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It has another meaning. It describes his 7000 year plan the last thousand years will be the millennial reign of Christ on Earth.
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He was just being a lazy fuck, no need to question his daily activities.
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So in days 1-6 God made the heavens and sea and sky and what have you. Then this is what gets me, it says "On the seventh day God rested."
Now is nt God this perfect, omnipotent being, who is eternal? Why did he rest? Surely some perfect being doesn't need to rest? To say he rested suggests he is somehow even partly mortal as things need to rest when their mind and muscles are tired, hence need to recuperate.
Well?
We know that this is incorrect because Ronnie Coleman has never rested.
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It is just the poetry of the times. What some guy thought sounded cool.
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So in days 1-6 God made the heavens and sea and sky and what have you. Then this is what gets me, it says "On the seventh day God rested."
Now is nt God this perfect, omnipotent being, who is eternal? Why did he rest? Surely some perfect being doesn't need to rest? To say he rested suggests he is somehow even partly mortal as things need to rest when their mind and muscles are tired, hence need to recuperate.
Well?
The muscular exegetes of Getbig Theological Seminary have cracked this vexing conundrum. Their interpretation of the sacred texts directly address your concerns: God didn't rest, he went off the grid.
How the Assbunny led to the Deus Absconditus (or, the God who hides)
Taking a moment to survey His wondrous feats of creation, on the Sixth Day, God made the Assbunny, and, after taking notice of His creature, He decided to hide from this world, instead turning his omnipotence to actualizing other possible worlds, of which this one, because it includes the abominable Assbunny, is not the best. Hence, the all powerful Lord did not rest on the seventh day, he skipped out of town on what became known henceforth as The Ssabbass. And that is how the Assbunny led irrevocably to the Deus Absconditus (Apocrypha 2.i:Anagignoskomena:Versio Tbombzius).
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He was just being a lazy fuck, no need to question his daily activities.
God was black. FACT!
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He got it done in reps, like in bodybuilding. Clearly you need rest times.
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God was black. FACT!
Rested. Not arrested.
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Rested. Not arrested.
Probably because he had no father.
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Don't see the problem. Following a typical six days on one day off body split
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that asshole did partial reps with Fridays and Saturdays though.... far too short.
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So in days 1-6 God made the heavens and sea and sky and what have you. Then this is what gets me, it says "On the seventh day God rested."
Now is nt God this perfect, omnipotent being, who is eternal? Why did he rest? Surely some perfect being doesn't need to rest? To say he rested suggests he is somehow even partly mortal as things need to rest when their mind and muscles are tired, hence need to recuperate.
Well?
God didn't rest because he was tired. He rested because he was finished.
LOLOL!
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God was black. FACT!
IS
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God's a f ag.
If he has a problem with this, he can come see Fortress.
I'll bust up his f aggot face.
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So in days 1-6 God made the heavens and sea and sky and what have you. Then this is what gets me, it says "On the seventh day God rested."
Now is nt God this perfect, omnipotent being, who is eternal? Why did he rest? Surely some perfect being doesn't need to rest? To say he rested suggests he is somehow even partly mortal as things need to rest when their mind and muscles are tired, hence need to recuperate.
Well?
And on the 8th day
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God's a f ag.
If he has a problem with this, he can come see Fortress.
I'll bust up his f aggot face.
One day it won't matter whether or not you believe.
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God was black. FACT!
Was?
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God was black. FACT!
If God was black, he would have rested 6 days and done very little work on the 7th
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God is a fag.
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He got it done in reps, like in bodybuilding. Clearly you need rest times.
I hope he didn't lose his pump by resting an entire day.
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Even God puts his feet up and watches football on Sundays.
As he should.
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(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/c7/6f/41/c76f417bec452cc5a6ae03350674a308.jpg)
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God was black. FACT!
IS
As John would say, this would explain His absence during the raising of His son and the fact that no on has seen Him since Mary became pregnant. You are an embarrassment to humanity, Wiggs.
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Not even God can gain size without a rest day.
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how can you count days before the earth was created?
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I FIND IT STRANGE THAT OUR MOON DOESN'T HAVE AN OFFICIAL NAME... JUST 'MOON'... KINDA FUCKED UP FOR GOD TO DO THAT
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how can you count days before the earth was created?
How can people assume man's concept of a time bears any resemblance to God's?
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I FIND IT STRANGE THAT OUR MOON DOESN'T HAVE AN OFFICIAL NAME... JUST 'MOON'... KINDA FUCKED UP FOR GOD TO DO THAT
EXCELLENT POINT
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which man-made language was god speaking in btw? :D
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which man-made language was god speaking in btw? :D
Yiddish ebonics