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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: El Diablo Blanco on January 05, 2017, 08:58:22 AM
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
Because sometimes the only thing you have in common is WORK. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn't. Work draws people closer especially if they have a mutual hatred for the boss. Look at how many affairs happen at work.
STAY POSITIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
It's rare when work friends extend the friendship indefinitely after the work relationship ends. I've seen it over and over and over for years...that said I don't invest much into my coworkers outside of work.
As one dude straight up told me years ago, "Hey, when I leave a place I'm done with everyone....no offense" He stuck to what he said LOL! Never heard from him again and we were tight while he worked there.
Basically, it's rare when work friends become true friends.
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They weren't your friends because they liked you. They were your friends out of convenience.
I stayed friends with my old coworker after she quit, and we still hung out and worked out together.
I have some "work friends" at my current job, but I know that as soon as I leave this place I'll never hear from them again and they won't hear from me. Because we're not "truly" friends, we're just work friends who go out for drinks once a month.
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They weren't your friends because they liked you. They were your friends out of convenience.
I stayed friends with my old coworker after she quit, and we still hung out and worked out together.
I have some "work friends" at my current job, but I know that as soon as I leave this place I'll never hear from them again and they won't hear from me. Because we're not "truly" friends, we're just work friends who go out for drinks once a month.
exactly.....I don't even invest the time anymore into "work friends"
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OP I know what you mean. This is normal. After all you lose a common interest.
I do have one or two guys I still see an speak on a regular basis but that is about it.
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They weren't your friends because they liked you. They were your friends out of convenience.
I stayed friends with my old coworker after she quit, and we still hung out and worked out together.
I have some "work friends" at my current job, but I know that as soon as I leave this place I'll never hear from them again and they won't hear from me. Because we're not "truly" friends, we're just work friends who go out for drinks once a month.
Somewhat.
Like I said, you have one big thing in common-WORK. You see each other everyday. How many outside work friends do you see everyday? People become even closer when there is a mutual hatred against something. Look on here...proves my point. Then you have outside friends that are "users" They only come around when they need you.
STAY POSITIVE!!!!!!!!!!!
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Somewhat.
Like I said, you have one big thing in common-WORK. You see each other everyday. How many outside work friends do you see everyday? People become even closer when there is a mutual hatred against something. Look on here...proves my point. Then you have outside friends that are "users" They only come around when they need you.
STAY POSITIVE!!!!!!!!!!!
This is why my old coworker and I stayed friends after she quit. We both had a passion for fitness and working out. We worked out together while we were coworkers, and kept doing so after she began working elsewhere. If I was a big gamer or something I would have probably remained friends with a couple other guys from my old job, but I'm not and so we don't really talk anymore.
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Unfortunately we all spend more time with our coworkers than we do our families and true friends in most years.
I'm not gonna invest in false, fair weather friendships of convenience anymore.
I even hate the forced "take you to lunch on your first day" and "take you to lunch on your last day" crap.
I've been at my job for 12 years and have seen hundreds come and go....those first and last lunches, white elephant Christmas exchanges, happy hours, etc....are basically meaningless once they leave the job LOL.
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
Yes, many times.
It's like people feel they need to be friends with some at work just to make their existence and time at work more tolerable.
If you get real friends at work, when you study, during military-service etc and whatnot, fine. Those are friends you probably will keep.
But i never understood those that try to seek out friends at their workplace just because.
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I have zero social interaction with anyone I work with.
I dont go to works christmas parties or social events.
They are colleagues, not friends.
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op has autism if he cant figure this stuff out on his own
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op has autism if he cant figure this stuff out on his own
Projecting much??
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I have a few people from my childhood those are the people who I call real friends my gym buddies and business associates those are not friends man would these people have your back if the going gets tough I doubt it.
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A small handful of lads I grew up with are the only few I consider friends, have been fortunate enough to work with at least one of them the majority of the time Ive worked in various jobs and presently work with two.
Other than a few lads from a job I worked at over 10 years ago who we always went out socially at the time I still exchange the odd text with and we try and arrange meeting for drinks but it never happens for some reason or other ive never kept in touch with anyone from work and wouldn't want to most are fucking jerks
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Unfortunately we all spend more time with our coworkers than we do our families and true friends in most years.
I'm not gonna invest in false, fair weather friendships of convenience anymore.
I even hate the forced "take you to lunch on your first day" and "take you to lunch on your last day" crap.
I've been at my job for 12 years and have seen hundreds come and go....those first and last lunches, white elephant Christmas exchanges, happy hours, etc....are basically meaningless once they leave the job LOL.
Harsh words. You would think you would want to interact with people to spread the good news.
STAY POSITIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I'm one of those dudes who goes no contact with my work friends when I change jobs.
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
I married my work friend.
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It seems that wherever I've worked I've made a couple close friends, people who've been to my home for dinner or parties, met out etc... but as soon as they quit or I leave they cease all contact. I would try to email or text but it just ends. Anyone encounter this shit?
It's just like internet forums.
I've met very few get-biggers in "real life" and don't expect to.
In my case, I chalk it up to THEM not wanting to meet me.
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I'm one of those people. It may seem like Im best buds with some of my work colleagues but once my job ends it's just lame and inconvenient to keep contact. And what are you going to talk about. 'Hey man hows the kids. Lift anything lately..?? ??? '
Even ceased contact with most childhood friends eons ago. You're "supposed" to keep those forever, but nope. Didn't get anything out from hanging out with them. I did keep contact with one of them because we shared some interests but havn't Heard from him in a couple of years now.
Tbh only close friends as an adult has been and is girlfriends.
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I'm one of those people. It may seem like Im best buds with some of my work colleagues but once my job ends it's just lame and inconvenient to keep contact. And what are you going to talk about. 'Hey man hows the kids. Lift anything lately..?? ??? '
Even ceased contact with most childhood friends eons ago. You're "supposed" to keep those forever, but nope. Didn't get anything out from hanging out with them. I did keep contact with one of them because we shared some interests but havn't Heard from him in a couple of years now.
Tbh only close friends as an adult has been and is girlfriends.
This is interesting. Actually, it seems a bit odd that you don't have at least one good buddy to hang with. Perhaps you are a loner at heart.
I'm friendly with pretty much everyone. There are a few close friends that I've known for decades. I don't have childhood friends, probably because I moved a lot with my parents. The few high school friends I had, have drifted away. This is largely due to the fact that we had almost nothing in common once we became adults.
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It's rare when work friends extend the friendship indefinitely after the work relationship ends. I've seen it over and over and over for years...that said I don't invest much into my coworkers outside of work.
As one dude straight up told me years ago, "Hey, when I leave a place I'm done with everyone....no offense" He stuck to what he said LOL! Never heard from him again and we were tight while he worked there.
Basically, it's rare when work friends become true friends.
Damn straight.
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Tom Hardy in the movie The Drop had it right on how to deal with people
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This is interesting. Actually, it seems a bit odd that you don't have at least one good buddy to hang with. Perhaps you are a loner at heart.
I'm friendly with pretty much everyone. There are a few close friends that I've known for decades. I don't have childhood friends, probably because I moved a lot with my parents. The few high school friends I had, have drifted away. This is largely due to the fact that we had almost nothing in common once we became adults.
Definately loner. Terrible at maintaining friendships. But like I said we didn't have much in common and I guess I didn't like them much anyways... And what am I supposed to do with buddies. Drink beer and Watch games? not my thing... I've had workout partners that I've hung out with outside that abit but that was some years ago and now I moved from that place.
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Definately loner. Terrible at maintaining friendships. But like I said we didn't have much in common and I guess I didn't like them much anyways... And what am I supposed to do with buddies. Drink beer and Watch games? not my thing... I've had workout partners that I've hung out with outside that abit but that was some years ago and now I moved from that place.
If they're your buddies you should have some things in common. Drinking beer and watching games is not my thing either. Getting together for a meal is more to my liking. My one really longtime friend lives a thousand miles away. We used to visit one another more often then we do now. He does not like to fly and it's probably too much of a drive for him. He's a few years older than me and we all know I'm about to die from old age....or so some Getbiggers think. ;D
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what's a friend ???
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Fuck friends........all they do is bring their drama to your doorstep.
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true work friends are rare
your work "friends" probably just relate with you through hating the boss, hating other coworkers, or using you for the latest workplace gossip
not really a good relationship if your common interests revolve around negativity
if one of you leave the job you no longer have those things in common because you won't care to hear how much they hate their new boss and coworkers
many would throw you under the bus for a promotion or to save their own job
also if it was a job they hate they might want to erase all reminders of that job and leaving everything in the rear view mirror, which means cutting you out of their life
E
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This is interesting. Actually, it seems a bit odd that you don't have at least one good buddy to hang with. Perhaps you are a loner at heart.
I'm friendly with pretty much everyone. There are a few close friends that I've known for decades. I don't have childhood friends, probably because I moved a lot with my parents. The few high school friends I had, have drifted away. This is largely due to the fact that we had almost nothing in common once we became adults.
Prime youre the best.
Offering advice, analysis of behavior and how it all relates to you.
Classic.
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Fuck friends........all they do is bring their drama to your doorstep.
not sure if they bring drama, but they usually dont give you what you want when you want it, so..... FUCK THEM
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The deal? You're livin' in the past, man!
(http://seinfeldism.com/images/eric-the-clown.jpg)
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OP what I suggest you do is go to a gay club and go up to guys and say hi will you be my friend I guarantee you will have plenty of friends by the end of the night, you might end up with a sore butthole but hey nothing in life is free.
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The deal? You're livin' in the past, man!
(http://seinfeldism.com/images/eric-the-clown.jpg)
meanwhile...
Seinfeld references in 2017 :P
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I'm feeling very meta today.
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No friends in engineering. Most are bizarre anyway. It's a tough career socially
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Similar situation exists with school friends. Personally, the only friendships I've maintained long term are those friends I made in military service.
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OP what I suggest you do is go to a gay club and go up to guys and say hi will you be my friend I guarantee you will have plenty of friends by the end of the night, you might end up with a sore butthole but hey nothing in life is free.
I'll try that this Saturday. Thanks for the advice.
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I think a lot of times people mistake acquaintances for friends. As stated previously true friends are rare indeed while we all make many acquaintances throughout our lifetimes. Of course these people are interchangeable depending on circumstances at the time such as where you work. A perfect example would be the buddies you like to go to a club with because you always have a great time pick up women etc but then once you get in a relationship that good time charlie is someone you no longer have very much in common with.
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You need common ground outside of work.
I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.
On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.
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You need common ground outside of work.
I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.
On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.
I find maintaining friendships with young children hard as well.
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I'll hang out with girls... But dudes? Nah.
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It's just like internet forums.
In my case, I chalk it up to THEM not wanting to meet me.
Duh.
Seem very bitter about that with the emphasis on "THEM".
You are weird.
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You need common ground outside of work.
I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.
On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have Very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.
This is true. I am one of them. It is hard to expand the circle, let alone maintain it.
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Friends in general change. I had childhood friends from Elementary right through college. Same group of guys. We'd keep in touch pretty often, meet up pretty often but like a sniper in a tree one by one they fell to marriage and family and just stopped staying in contact. Once in a while I'd travel back to my hometown where they ALL still live, other than me no one else left. they befriended the next generation that came after us and just seem to not have moved on with their lives. Strange being in mid 30's at your friends house with his 20 year old friends hanging out. You realize you have lost all that you had in common, come back home and try to start over making friends that were as close as your old ones but it's real hard to do when you're an adult. That bond you had cannot be replicated anymore. That simplistic view of the world we once had made it easy to find commonalities but as life gets more complicated and issues broader that gap widens and you realize you have a lot less in common.
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Duh.
Seem very bitter about that with the emphasis on "THEM".
You are weird.
he keeps repeating his life story over and over too about how he competed and did pretty well despite only using a little gear but having no regrets and his wife is a vice president of goldman sachs and how he has several (two) rental properties and a phd in physics overall he's pretty satisfied