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1  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Kai Greene - Is Kai finally losing his mind? His new outfit? on: June 22, 2014, 01:09:32 PM
A mrind is a terrible thing to waste.

2  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: One More Rep Appreciation Thread (No Homo) on: June 17, 2014, 06:08:48 AM
A pragmatic, polyglot practitioner of hard line diplomacy who will polywhip your ass before you go-go.
A real mensch.
3  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: No college on: June 10, 2014, 09:55:19 AM
Re: No College (esp. 'the education system is nothing but a rip off')

While various forms of social advancement correlate to high academic achievement (vide, e.g., our very own Voodoo Vincenzo, CSN MFT, Dry Anal Gappa), one does not need a college degree or highfalutin credentials to attain conventional measures of success.

However, having said that:

Statistically: You're committing sampling bias.
Logically: You're committing a fallacy of composition.
Socially: You're ill-equipped to hold your own in intelligent, well-educated company.

Getbigically: Your reasoning is flawless. Carry on.
4  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Actor Tracy Morgan in critical condition on: June 08, 2014, 07:19:54 AM
Loved his depiction of gritty realism in Ghost Dog, and the touching, Oscar-winning performance he gave in Jerry Maguire: memorable motion pictor actor. Nigrum in pace.
5  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Why rename Night of Champions? on: April 18, 2014, 08:35:30 AM
Ben Brantley calls A Night of Champions a triumphant blend of heroic moxie and monastic reflection: "Mixing elements of Augustinian confession and Pantagruelian picaresque, Marty Champions' dazzling one man show is like a Waiting for Godot where Godot not only shows up, he brings Zarathustra along to join him in taking a pyramid shit on your most accepted beliefs. Folks, this is 'Theatre of the Absorbed' – you'll laugh yourself to sleep and weep until your sides split. Absurd, you say? Put down the heme-iron and come find out!" Rating: 4/4 crates of raped grapefruits.
6  Getbig Main Boards / General Topics / Re: What are you reading? on: April 17, 2014, 02:18:36 PM
King of the Latin Boom and el realismo mágico.

A great light has gone out.

Aureliano Babilonia, having just seized the hidden meaning of Melquíades' prophetic history of Macondo, finally reaches the end of the manuscript he is reading to read about an Aureliano Babilonia reading Melquíades' history of Macondo. In a Borgesian-inspired narration, García Márquez writes: "Before reaching the final line, however, he had already understood that he would never leave that room, for it was foreseen that the city of mirrors (or mirages) would be wiped out by the wind and exiled from the memory of men at the precise moment when Aureliano Babilonia would finish deciphering the parchments, and that everything written on them was unrepeatable since time immemorial and forever more, because races condemned to one hundred years of solitude did not have a second opportunity on earth." See Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude, trans. Gregory Rabassa (London: Picador, 1978), p. 336.  

7  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Who is more boring and bland: hulkotron or haider? on: April 16, 2014, 04:31:37 PM
Rome wasn't built in a day. Hulkotron did it in a Šarčev giant set: 35 minutes, tops. The rest of the day was spent drinking quail eggs in mead and inducing the Sabine women to cum against their wills. Monuments to his erection were erected. The people were grateful. Glorious times.
8  Getbig Main Boards / General Topics / Re: quit turing the other cheek.............. on: April 09, 2014, 06:11:59 AM
Yeah, but what's that to do with Alan Turing?

Quite right. What, indeed? Although, as you know, Juan S. Earle, from Paraguay via Deutschland, showed the virtues of not being politically correct in his well-known destruction of fried rice functionalism through the Slanty-Eyed-Chink Room Experiment, which argued, inter alia, that Wong Hong's head failed the Turing test because it lacked semantic content and is merely a splooge processing giant egg roll.
9  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Mythical El Chupacabra finally captured? on: April 04, 2014, 02:50:56 PM
Said to have been born from Zeus' taint, the mythological bestiary tells of the Chupapinga, a vile creature with a weakness for centaur bukkake behind the Augean stables.

10  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Caption this pic (Getbiggers) on: March 27, 2014, 07:09:11 AM

The foaming latte and group periscope bath scene from the great German WWII gay submarine epic Das Fruits (1981), starring Jürgen Crotchnow as the hard U-boat commander.
11  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Raw milk. on: March 26, 2014, 10:00:47 AM
Ah, a familiar topic. Well, about an hour before my morning workout, I avail myself to a 720ml dose of fresh breast milk from a local nursery for unwed mothers. Because this is a preworkout dose, the most contemporary research from the Norwegian Institute of Pointy-Sisters (aka, NIPS) recommends the selection of a lovely young hebrette for her milk's naturally higher androgen content. Subsequently, I find that aggression and intensity are noticeably increased, and, I have to say, the batch of chocolate goodness is consistently top-shelf, human grade stuff, and not some lower quality Chinese generic counterfeit (the well-known maxim, "knocked-up is greater than knocked-off" applies here, as always). Later in the evening, after "official" closing hours, I return to the nursery for a fresh re-dose from an another buxom nubile nubian, and, when discretionary income allows, the fellating services of a blonde dormitory wetnurse for (i) increased positive synergies and (ii) stimulating that much sought after 3-D, blow-up from within effect. Sides are tolerable.
12  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Have You Ever Read A Book That Changed You/Your Ways or Inspired You? on: March 13, 2014, 09:21:00 AM
Arthur Fleeber’s Guns N Provolone, which draws from Karl Marx’s Das Kapital, Immanuel Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason, and the Lake Tahoe scene from Godfather II for the sake of providing an Archimedean paradigm that strips uncanny (Unheimliche) elements from existence to fashion a stable foundation upon which to feel at-home (zu Hause) in the world.

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13  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Caption this picture. on: March 08, 2014, 09:18:27 AM

The Rock: Look, João Paulo, I don't care that you won the Favela Sweepstakes for a workout with the "Rocha," this raffle ticket is "merda," motherfucka.

João Paulo: So, ees goot, rye?
14  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Jeebus Wiggs, is this you? on: February 20, 2014, 10:58:46 AM

This shit is getting REALLY old, dude.  

And when I say old, I mean long past stringy cadaver beef-jerkiness old.  I mean older than mummified Pharaoh dust, which would date back to ...

Oh, wait:  I forgot how you cherry-pick "evidence" to support your claims :LOL:  One minute, the scientific community hits the nail on the head but, at the same time, you won't have any part of their "faulty carbon dating" -- a rather pathetic stolen concept predicated in a massive Begging the Question fallacy.

... and all of that supposed vitriol is coming from someone who gets a kick out of your posts and actually likes you (yes, in spite of the fact I think perhaps 95% of what you say is among the silliest shit I've ever read -- and believe me, that's saying something!).

The whole premise of black people doing this and that before recorded time is a big fucking CROCK.  Yeah, sure, they accomplished so many things ... but said things were all before anyone wrote them down in any kind of enduring record (hmm ... wonder why?), so we're essentially supposed to accept the premise of Mighty Blackie as an article of faith.

The Wiggs Hypothesis (a.k.a. The Wiggs-Fauxon and N.O.T. – acronym for Theory of Nothing – the acronym is backward, like the theory itself) attempts to offer a standard model of why darks matter. It's still quite murky.
15  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Where does work ethic come from? on: February 02, 2014, 01:22:56 PM
Its not honest in New York.  Cheesy  Its mob controlled still.

Well, my good friend from Staten Island, Santo "the mandible" Incaviglia, who is a delegate in good standing with Teamsters Local 831, says that this "is all lies and meant to prophylactate a myth to betaint the wholesome deposition of Italian-Americans."
16  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Vissy shaves his head. on: February 01, 2014, 08:30:04 AM
Fallout from being in love with El Culo Frio.

from the wiped-out Vince-hackers thread:

The hackers think that they pulled one over on Vince. Ha! Little do they know that he is the Kim Philby (or, perhaps, the Mata Hari) of the bodybuilding community. The old KGB used to keep a three foot dossier on Vince, and Fidel Castro himself (still a regular, if anonymous, habitué of Anabolic Mayhem Español) conferred upon him the codename El Culo Frio for his icy bearing and stone-cold precision. Vince is a covert double-agent who courts danger, plants desires, and feigns weakness for his ultimate advantage. He is the mutha’ fuckin’ polonium-210 of the fitness industry. Underestimate him at your own peril. Shit’s about to go nuclear.
17  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Just got off the phone with syntaxmachine -- he's a fucking fraud on: January 20, 2014, 11:43:03 PM
calling Kahn.N.Singh to confirm

I have been called by the venerable Roger Bacon, and the time has finally come to confess that the Honorable Kahn.N.Singh is himself a charlatan, just another matryoshka doll the Oracle-King added to his never-ending collection of gimmicks while clicking past CSPAN between swills of BCAAs & Chivas.

You've been had, you mentally negligible suckers!!

Now kneel before your sovereign lord!

18  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: The Vince Goodrum Show - Episode 10 - Kill That Tumor Edition Now Available! on: January 18, 2014, 11:29:55 AM
Will there be call-ins? I'd like to call in my best British upper class accent, a blend of Commander McBragg and Hugh "Bullshot" Crummond, to regale your audience with my many tales of derring-do.
19  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Sev's secret twin on: January 16, 2014, 06:52:33 AM
The Tesla clone that got away from the magnificent magus takes a selfie for the evidentiary record. Pensive and despondent, he reflects: Why do I have to replicate a bald Romanian? The wind blows in response.

20  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Random pics on: January 15, 2014, 01:35:51 PM

Your munificence speaks well of your ancestors and upbringing. Thank you.
21  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Only if you want it to be on: January 14, 2014, 04:08:09 PM

Long suffering Franco struggles to accept why the satisfied Oak does not reciprocate that element of their intimacy.
22  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Random pics on: January 14, 2014, 08:50:38 AM

Tour de Banane.

A photo captured just before the treacherous ascent up Mont Plantain-Frites. Only one it made back down. The others disappeared into the thorny brush armed with a little salt and garlic mojito.
23  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: As well as a mind reader, soviet experiment subject, Sevestase was also a ... on: January 13, 2014, 09:44:48 AM
It is true that I could do almost anything I wanted. I played tennis, squash, basketball, competed in bodybuilding, taught tennis, personal training, brokerage, dancing, stripping, advertising .. but I would get bored and move on.

Although there is much dispute over its actual prevalence, Sev is what is sometimes referred to in the psychological literature as a "multipotential," i.e., an extremely gifted and well-rounded individual (no homo) with talents so extraordinarily wide-ranging that it presents a problem when it's time to decide on a career ( Remember, Sev is, inter alia, a reviewed author:

can you give us some exciting excerpts from your book in English?

Here's a review from an advance copy:

The book is divided into two sections separated by a color centerfold of the author arranged like Manet's Olympia (with Goodrum as the black servant). The first part argues for "a pandemonium Tbombz" architecture of the mind; the second part builds upon the first and proceeds to enumerate several ramifications the theory has on our understanding of deep internal states, which, as the author puts it, "are always in need of a fierce ramming."   
      Basically, the author understands the mind to mainly consist of many small agents, viz. Tbombz demons, who are always conjuring multiple drafts toward intentionally steering the direction of phallic objects into unusually deep and moist areas of awareness, with the most powerful and dominant Tbombz-demon influencing human agency. The cumupshot of his research is a triumph of arseparsimony; namely, that there is limited opportunity for cognition and human consciousness without deep tissue massage. Ultimately, the author's "pandemonium Tbombz architecture" dispels the notion of a "Cartesian Theater" with a "ghost in the machine," but instead gives powerful thrust to the possibility that the mind is like an isolated truck stop bathroom with a "host in the latrine," i.e., with a lot of horny Tbombz attendants.
24  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: "Get Swoll" by IFBB pro Constantine Demetrio featuring Rich Piana on: January 08, 2014, 09:44:26 AM
Dude scored an extraordinary FS 146 DQ on the WADS (Wechsler Adult Douche Scale). That's a Douche Quotient three standard deviations above the mean. Yes, I know there is plenty of contention in the literature over the quantification of douchebaggery, but the video strongly corroborates the results.
25  Getbig Main Boards / Gossip & Opinions / Re: Analyze this picture on: January 05, 2014, 04:36:21 PM


The Dominican: Who are we?
The Russian: We don't know who we are, and here we are in the darkness.
The Neegrew: What the fuck? This feels familiar. Who are we?
The Russian: We're nameless things with big muscles, well-oiled objects with no memory, no knowledge of what went before. No understanding of what is now, no knowledge of what will be.
The Dominican: Look, a rope that leads to a way out.
The Russian: Little Neegrew, climb the rope and see what's out there.
The Neegrew: You talkin' to me?
The Russian: Yes, now climb up.
(The little Neegrew climbs up, gets winded half way, then falls none worse for the wear)

[Rod Serling] Three Stretch Armstrongs stuck together in a pit of darkness. No logic, no reason, no explanation; just a prolonged nightmare in which fear, loneliness, and the bizarre pulls, tugs, rubs, and insertions in the hands and holes of a depraved schmoe, the insatiable MOB, are constantly repeated again and again. In a moment, we'll start collecting clues as to the whys, the whats, and the wheres. We will not, however, end the nightmare, we'll only amplify it. For in the arms of the MOB, there can be nothing but lust. A Dominican, a Russian, and a Neegrew. Tonight's cast of players in the perverted toy box known as - The Getbig Zone.
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