3 former leaders of ex-gay ministry apologize

[BayGBM]

3 former leaders of ex-gay ministry apologize
They cite psychological harm they caused gays as the ministry, Exodus International, meets in Irvine.
By Rebecca Trounson

Three former leaders of Exodus International, often described as the nation's largest ex-gay ministry, publicly apologized Wednesday for the harm they said their efforts had caused many gays and lesbians who believed the group's message that sexual orientation could be changed through prayer.

Speaking at a Hollywood news conference, the former leaders of the interdenominational Christian organization said they had acted sincerely in their years of work with Exodus. But they said they had all, over time, become disillusioned with the group's ideas and concerned about what they described as the wrenching human toll of such gay conversion efforts.

The news event, in a courtyard outside an office of the Los Angeles Gay & Lesbian Center, was timed to coincide with the opening of Exodus' annual conference, which is being held this week at Concordia University in Irvine. A competing "ex-gay survivor" convention is to begin Friday at UC Irvine.

Exodus' president, Alan Chambers, reached by phone at the meeting in Irvine, said he disagreed with its critics, adding that its methods have helped many people, including him.

"Exodus is here for people who want an alternative to homosexuality," Chambers said. "There are thousands of people like me who have overcome this. I think there's room for more than one opinion on this subject, and giving people options isn't dangerous."

The former leaders from Exodus cast its work in grim terms.

"Some who heard our message were compelled to try to change an integral part of themselves, bringing harm to themselves and their families," the three, including former Exodus co-founder Michael Bussee, said in a joint written statement presented at the news conference. "Although we acted in good faith, we have since witnessed the isolation, shame, fear and loss of faith that this message creates."

Now a licensed family therapist in Riverside, Bussee left Exodus in 1979 after he fell in love with a man who was a fellow ex-gay counselor with the group. He speaks out frequently against ex-gay therapies.

"God's love and forgiveness does indeed change people," said Bussee, who remains an evangelical Christian. "It changed me. It just didn't make me straight."

Others speaking at Wednesday's news conference included Jeremy Marks, former president of Exodus International Europe, and Darlene Bogle, the founder and former director of Paraklete Ministries, an Exodus referral agency based in Hayward, Calif.

All three said they had known people who had tried to change their sexual orientation with the help of the group but had failed, often becoming depressed or even suicidal as a result.

"We are committed Christians, but we're still gay," said Marks, who heads Courage UK, a gay-affirming evangelical ministry based in England.

Among those at the news conference was the Rev. Mel White, founder and president of a faith-based gay rights group called Soulforce. White, who was the ghostwriter for the Rev. Jerry Falwell's autobiography and later came out as gay, praised the former Exodus leaders.

"It's a major moment, a paradigm shift," White said. "They're saying this doesn't work, and that's incredibly important."

The Exodus meeting is expected to attract about 1,000 people, Chambers said. Chambers, who is married and has children, said he and other current Exodus officials are careful to warn those who seek help that such a path is not easy.

Sexual orientation "isn't a light switch that you can switch on and off," he said.

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-exgay28jun28,0,1590125.story?coll=la-home-center

[Colossus_500]

3 former leaders of ex-gay ministry apologize
They cite psychological harm they caused gays as the ministry, Exodus International, meets in Irvine.
By Rebecca Trounson

Three former leaders of Exodus International, often described as the nation's largest ex-gay ministry, publicly apologized Wednesday for the harm they said their efforts had caused many gays and lesbians who believed the group's message that sexual orientation could be changed through prayer.

Speaking at a Hollywood news conference, the former leaders of the interdenominational Christian organization said they had acted sincerely in their years of work with Exodus. But they said they had all, over time, become disillusioned with the group's ideas and concerned about what they described as the wrenching human toll of such gay conversion efforts.

The news event, in a courtyard outside an office of the Los Angeles Gay & Lesbian Center, was timed to coincide with the opening of Exodus' annual conference, which is being held this week at Concordia University in Irvine. A competing "ex-gay survivor" convention is to begin Friday at UC Irvine.

Exodus' president, Alan Chambers, reached by phone at the meeting in Irvine, said he disagreed with its critics, adding that its methods have helped many people, including him.

"Exodus is here for people who want an alternative to homosexuality," Chambers said. "There are thousands of people like me who have overcome this. I think there's room for more than one opinion on this subject, and giving people options isn't dangerous."

The former leaders from Exodus cast its work in grim terms.

"Some who heard our message were compelled to try to change an integral part of themselves, bringing harm to themselves and their families," the three, including former Exodus co-founder Michael Bussee, said in a joint written statement presented at the news conference. "Although we acted in good faith, we have since witnessed the isolation, shame, fear and loss of faith that this message creates."

Now a licensed family therapist in Riverside, Bussee left Exodus in 1979 after he fell in love with a man who was a fellow ex-gay counselor with the group. He speaks out frequently against ex-gay therapies.

"God's love and forgiveness does indeed change people," said Bussee, who remains an evangelical Christian. "It changed me. It just didn't make me straight."

Others speaking at Wednesday's news conference included Jeremy Marks, former president of Exodus International Europe, and Darlene Bogle, the founder and former director of Paraklete Ministries, an Exodus referral agency based in Hayward, Calif.

All three said they had known people who had tried to change their sexual orientation with the help of the group but had failed, often becoming depressed or even suicidal as a result.

"We are committed Christians, but we're still gay," said Marks, who heads Courage UK, a gay-affirming evangelical ministry based in England.

Among those at the news conference was the Rev. Mel White, founder and president of a faith-based gay rights group called Soulforce. White, who was the ghostwriter for the Rev. Jerry Falwell's autobiography and later came out as gay, praised the former Exodus leaders.

"It's a major moment, a paradigm shift," White said. "They're saying this doesn't work, and that's incredibly important."

The Exodus meeting is expected to attract about 1,000 people, Chambers said. Chambers, who is married and has children, said he and other current Exodus officials are careful to warn those who seek help that such a path is not easy.

Sexual orientation "isn't a light switch that you can switch on and off," he said.

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-exgay28jun28,0,1590125.story?coll=la-home-center

I think the statements Chambers made are quite fair. 

Do you know where I can find a copy of the entire letter written by the three former leaders? 

I would expect that there would be a larger outcry against orginizations like Love One Out, Set Free Ministries, or the Training Center, but I really haven't seen to much of what's being claimed in this article. 

[Dos Equis]

"We are committed Christians, but we're still gay," said Marks, who heads Courage UK, a gay-affirming evangelical ministry based in England.

 

[MCWAY]

I think the statements Chambers made are quite fair. 

Do you know where I can find a copy of the entire letter written by the three former leaders? 

I would expect that there would be a larger outcry against orginizations like Love One Out, Set Free Ministries, or the Training Center, but I really haven't seen to much of what's being claimed in this article. 

Such article love to feature those who've backslidden into homosexuality. But, they rarely present the other side of the coins, those who have left homosexuality and stayed away.

If, as Mel White claims, "this thing doesn't work", why is Chambers still with his wife? Or, the former poster boy for Love Won Out, Jon Paulk? Even with his slip up in 2000, he (last time I checked) was still married with three kids (assumedly procured the old-fashioned way ).

I see it as no different from, say, Alcoholics Anonymous. Some people succeed; some people fail. But, trumpeting the failures, while intentionally ignoring the success stories is hardly a way to present this issue.

More often than not, when "ex-gays" (as some call former homosexuals are called) try to present their case, we see just how "tolerant" certain members of the gay community are.

[OzmO]

I don't see what the difference is.......  people repeatedly cheat on their wives, steal pens from work, slander their neighbors, take the lords name in vain etc....   And they are forgiven.

[MCWAY]

I don't see what the difference is.......  people repeatedly cheat on their wives, steal pens from work, slander their neighbors, take the lords name in vain etc....   And they are forgiven.

True, indeed! But, last time I checked that forgiveness comes with the understanding that the aforementioned trangressions are to be forsaken.

The issue with homosexuality is that some folks, like Mel White, aren't even making the acknowledgement of homosexuality being sinful.

[OzmO]

True, indeed! But, last time I checked that forgiveness comes with the understanding that the aforementioned trangressions are to be forsaken.

The issue with homosexuality is that some folks, like Mel White, aren't even making the acknowledgement of homosexuality being sinful.

So then if he does......it's all ok as long as he repents every time?

[MCWAY]

So then if he does......it's all ok as long as he repents every time?

Did you miss the part about "trangressions are to be forsaken". Or, as Jesus put it "Go and sin no more."

[OzmO]

Did you miss the part about "trangressions are to be forsaken". Or, as Jesus put it "Go and sin no more."

So all these people that continue to sin aren't really saved then?

[Dos Equis]

Such article love to feature those who've backslidden into homosexuality. But, they rarely present the other side of the coins, those who have left homosexuality and stayed away.

If, as Mel White claims, "this thing doesn't work", why is Chambers still with his wife? Or, the former poster boy for Love Won Out, Jon Paulk? Even with his slip up in 2000, he (last time I checked) was still married with three kids (assumedly procured the old-fashioned way ).

I see it as no different from, say, Alcoholics Anonymous. Some people succeed; some people fail. But, trumpeting the failures, while intentionally ignoring the success stories is hardly a way to present this issue.

More often than not, when "ex-gays" (as some call former homosexuals are called) try to present their case, we see just how "tolerant" certain members of the gay community are.

I agree.  Well said. 

[Dos Equis]

So then if he does......it's all ok as long as he repents every time?

Nope.  Repenting means acknowledging what you did was wrong, asking for forgiveness, and turning away from your wrongful conduct.   

[OzmO]

Nope.  Repenting means acknowledging what you did was wrong, asking for forgiveness, and turning away from your wrongful conduct.   

And if you continue that conduct?

[Dos Equis]

And if you continue that conduct?

Then you haven't repented. 

[Colossus_500]

So then if he does......it's all ok as long as he repents every time?

OzmO, did you read the devotional that's posted in the Devotionals thread from the latter part of last week?  It's the one by the late Adrian Rodgers, and speaks to exactly what you are asking. 

[loco]

So then if he does......it's all ok as long as he repents every time?

OzmO, sin is NEVER ok.  We will not be forgiven from sins committed unless we acknowledge that they are sins, that they are NOT ok, unless we ask for forgiveness and turn away from those sins. 

It is possible, as imperfect humans, to repeat the same sin in the future, after having repented of that sin in the past and after having been forgiven.  In that case, we must repent again and ask for forgiveness again and continue to do all we can to grow spiritually and stay close to God in order to be able to turn away from that sin.  It is impossible to live like Jesus without God's help.

God cannot be fooled because God looks at our hearts.  If we are not sincere and just sin, then ask for forgiveness, only to go back and commit the same sin over and over again, then we will not be forgiven, because we have not truly repented.  We cannot acknowledge that something is a sin and believe that it is ok at the same time.

[Colossus_500]

Confessions of a former 'gay rights' leader

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted: July 10, 2007
1:00 a.m. Eastern

Editor's note: See the news story about Michael Glatze, "'Gay'-rights leader quits homosexuality."

By Michael Glatze



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WorldNet Daily © 2007 

I used to be gay, or so I thought.

When I was about 13, I decided I must be gay because I was unable to handle my own masculinity. It scared me too much. My father had already given me a lot to be afraid of: He'd cheated on my mother and left her crying, alone and selflessly attempting to salvage a dead relationship.

When I was faced with the prospect of either being a "man" or being "me" – who I saw as "better than that" and "not someone who would do such awful things as men do" – I chose "me." Then, because "me" was not "a man," "me" became gay.

I'm not saying this is how homosexuality develops for everybody. It's just my story.

For me, however, it became all-encompassing because I've always been driven to strive and achieve in everything I do. So I became an activist.

I started activism when I was 20 at Dartmouth College where I went to school. I continued as a protester at the Republican National Convention in San Diego in 1996. We chalked outlines of ourselves on the sidewalk and ran around shouting slogans and such.

When I was 22, I started work at XY Magazine, the first-ever magazine targeted at gay youth. Then, when I was about 25, I edited "The XY Survival Guide: Everything You Need to Know About Being Young & Gay," the first-ever "guidebook" for being young and gay. Then when I was 26, I left XY to start Young Gay America, which was a non-profit, media-based outreach project that drove around North America, conducting interviews with gay and lesbian youth and uploading their interviews and stories to the Internet in a community-based website.

(Column continues below)


Young Gay America became Young Gay America Magazine in 2004. During the time between starting Young Gay America in 2001 and starting YGA Magazine, I was in over 50 magazines and newspapers, television and radio shows.

I was asked to speak on prestigious panels all over the world, at universities and conferences, as an expert on gay youth. In 2004, I sat on the first-ever gay youth in America panel discussion at the Kennedy School of Government, Harvard University.

I met world leaders as part of Young Gay America. I met the mayor of Berlin and the prime minister of Canada. Young Gay America received a National Role Model Award, and a film that Young Gay America helped make was screened at 50 international film festivals, won awards and even screened for a special bipartisan gathering of the U.S. Congress.

As you can see, Young Gay America, at least for me, was a big success.

YGA Magazine was loved by many and accepted instantly into several North American high schools' libraries. Parents groups loved it. We had all 5-star reviews on Amazon.com; it was loved.

I, however, was not loved – not loved by myself, that is.

I was in a relationship that was challenging, because it had aspects to it that I didn't enjoy. I didn't know until later that those aspects were not unique to my situation at all. But at the same time, I didn't understand what was really bothering me.

It turned out, after I left YGA and my relationship, what was really bothering me was homosexuality itself.

It's not popular to say that, especially when you're a gay rights "pioneer" (or so some people called me; I never tried to see myself as such, though I didn't exactly turn down the accolades). It's not a popular thing at all. It's more popular to say you've committed a crime than to say – as a gay person – that you might have a problem with homosexuality.

That gets labeled "internal homophobia."

Well, I knew all about internal homophobia, having read up, studied, volunteered for Gay & Lesbian National Hotline counseling sessions with random people, having interviewed and "empowered" over 1,000 young people in 38 states and four Canadian provinces, and even Zagreb, Croatia, about the importance of overcoming internal homophobia. It was not news to me at all.

Then again, it wasn't internal homophobia that caused my so-called "hatred" of my own homosexuality.

It was God.

God – I know – is a buzzword. God scares people. I know this. I'm sorry that's the case.

However, this is my story. And, my story includes me having a nervous breakdown, feeling like I was hurting tons of people with my actions, and turning to the Bible, praying and understanding that what was in the Bible was not nearly as scary as what people had made it out to be.

In my story, I became acquainted with a very personal God whom I spoke to and who told me that I was beautiful, and that everyone else was – and is – too. In my story, I had a good relationship with God that got richer as I spent more time with Him. In my story, God is my best friend.

I continued to develop a deeper understanding of who and what I really am, thanks to God and thanks to what He showed me. I followed His guidance and found books that revealed all sorts of "deep, dark" secrets about things like "socialism," Concerned Women for America, "abstinence-only education" and the National Association of Research & Therapy of Homosexuality. All these things I found truly opened my eyes.

For me, it was both a blessing and a profound curse – a challenge and a heartache – that God showed me all of this information. I knew what it meant: that I was going to have to forsake all of my life up until that point. Jesus, in the Bible, asks us to give up our lives for his sake. In a sense, I was ready and willing to do that.

In a sense, that's exactly what I did. And I became a Christian. And I started to heal – and I stand today a healed man.

And so, my story becomes a story of healing from homosexuality, which I write in order to "set the record straight" about the notion that people can't heal from homosexuality. That is not true. People can heal. I did it.

How did it happened? Well, a lot of that is private. A lot of that has to do with figuring out deep things about my mind, about the nature of where "desire" comes from, about what we think "desire" is and what it really is, about all sorts of things like that.

I can – and easily would – describe it if asked.

But for the sake of brevity here, I'm focusing on the fact that it did occur. And I did get cured.

I'm not looking for an award or recognition. I'm not looking for anybody even to be happy for me – I know a lot of people are probably really upset to hear me say this.

I know that's the case, because I know that if I had heard somebody say these things a few years ago, I probably would've made them Public Enemy No. 1 on my list.

In my humble story, however, I'm happy this way.

That's it.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That's not it, though, on second thought. Because on second thought, if I think about it, I was under the impression, right from the beginning, that homosexuality was an intrinsic part of me that I couldn't get rid of. People scared me into thinking that. And people do that today. I did that to people! I led a media company that focused on doing that.

So, no, it's not the end of the story at all – my story, that is. It's not at all my end. Because, from my perspective, homosexuality is not just something I was healed from, but it's something that is flat-out wrong, because it can be healed, even though people say it can't.

And not only can it be healed, I've seen the difference between gay and straight in my very mind!

I've seen it go from one … to the other – NEVER to return.

I wouldn't want it to return, because now I can't even imagine it. It's like thinking about doing the weirdest, grossest thing that just makes you feel sick inside.

This, again, is my story. And in my story, it makes me repulsed to think about homosexuality.

And when I step back a little bit, I know why! Because people are supposed to feel like homosexuality is gross, because such a feeling prevents them from wanting to do it. And people are supposed to not want to do it, because doing it is something that prevents them from having babies, and having babies is something that we – naturally – are supposed to want to do, for human beings to survive. And, so, it's obvious why people should feel gross about homosexuality.

It's not "wrong" for people to think it's gross. It makes sense!

If anything, it's not thinking homosexuality is gross that's weird. What if we stopped thinking that all harmful behaviors – all things that prevent us from doing what we're supposed to do and being what we're supposed to be – were gross? What then? Would we have no natural sense of who we are, why we're here, what we're supposed to do with our lives?

I understand this notion of "homophobia" – only it's not a phobia at all. It's common sense.

My story is that now I know the Truth about homosexuality. And my story is that now I'm going to do what I can to fight it.

 

[OzmO]

OzmO, sin is NEVER ok.  We will not be forgiven from sins committed unless we acknowledge that they are sins, that they are NOT ok, unless we ask for forgiveness and turn away from those sins. 

It is possible, as imperfect humans, to repeat the same sin in the future, after having repented of that sin in the past and after having been forgiven.  In that case, we must repent again and ask for forgiveness again and continue to do all we can to grow spiritually and stay close to God in order to be able to turn away from that sin.  It is impossible to live like Jesus without God's help.

God cannot be fooled because God looks at our hearts.  If we are not sincere and just sin, then ask for forgiveness, only to go back and commit the same sin over and over again, then we will not be forgiven, because we have not truly repented.  We cannot acknowledge that something is a sin and believe that it is ok at the same time.

Hmmm  he looks into our hearts yet he doesn't understand the human heart as we talked earlier.   Sorry,  it's not very convincing.

People who are repeat offenders are usually truly sorry in their hearts, yet in their weakness they continue to repeat the same acts becuase they know there will always be be someone there from the church to forgive them.

What's never really is addressed is their weakness becuase it's always placated by the supposed "holy spirit" laced with guilt.

God (holy spirit) works when you do.