One woman's response to a cheating spouse

[gtbro1]

It's better to cheat on your woman before she cheats on you..

  and then I bet you would be mad as all get out when she does it to you. 

[24KT]

Sorry my bad 

Even my own Mother runs by that philosophy that is a man cheats it is his fault and if a woman cheats it is also the guys fault LOL
I have had a few girl friends cheat on me in my time AND THEIR FRIENDS would ask me what I did to cause it     

That's because most often when men cheat, it's because they can, ...and it's usually for sex.
Most often when women cheat, it's because her emotional needs are not being met by her partner.

[~flower~]

  No good excuse, if your needs aren't being met, then just leave the person.

  It is ALWAYS the person who cheated fault for cheating no matter what the other person did.  Unhappy?  Dump em.

[24KT]

  No good excuse, if your needs aren't being met, then just leave the person.

  It is ALWAYS the person who cheated fault for cheating no matter what the other person did.  Unhappy?  Dump em.

I agree, ...I'm simply pointing out why the double standard exists.
Besides, ...if something is broken, ...chances are, ...it was a man who broke it. 

[Playboy]

I agree, ...I'm simply pointing out why the double standard exists.
Besides, ...if something is broken, ...chances are, ...it was a man who broke it. 

Not really. I have seen married women at my work have flings with others and when I was a lot younger I was one of the others. It goes both ways.

[powerpack]

I agree, ...I'm simply pointing out why the double standard exists.
Besides, ...if something is broken, ...chances are, ...it was a man who broke it. 

Hah! Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of woman screw up their own marriages and relationships.
And it is nice to see you admit that there are double standards 

[Cap]

That's because most often when men cheat, it's because they can, ...and it's usually for sex.
Most often when women cheat, it's because her emotional needs are not being met by her partner.

This one always got to me.  I always found it odd that someone (man or woman) would claim that their emotional needs were being met in the sack.  If you are feeling neglected emotionally there are better ways to deal with it.  If you think your emotional needs will never be met by your partner then you should find someone new.  If you are a freak in bed and want a new position, just tell the dude because I bet he will do just about anything to please you.  Emotional things are tough with guys but I definitely think we get blamed for a lot more than we deserve.

[gtbro1]

I agree, ...I'm simply pointing out why the double standard exists.
Besides, ...if something is broken, ...chances are, ...it was a man who broke it. 

   I blame the woman the man is cheating with for tempting him when he is weak and vulnerable.

[powerpack]

  I blame the woman the man is cheating with for tempting him when he is weak and vulnerable.

VIVA! 

[24KT]

This one always got to me.  I always found it odd that someone (man or woman) would claim that their emotional needs were being met in the sack.  If you are feeling neglected emotionally there are better ways to deal with it.  If you think your emotional needs will never be met by your partner then you should find someone new.  If you are a freak in bed and want a new position, just tell the dude because I bet he will do just about anything to please you.  Emotional things are tough with guys but I definitely think we get blamed for a lot more than we deserve.

1^st A woman's emotional needs aren't met in the sack. But once her emotional needs are met, that can often be one of the places she expresses herself.

As for the 2^nd highlight, ...I suppose that'd be exactly what the cheating woman would be doing, no?

[Cap]

1^st A woman's emotional needs aren't met in the sack. But once her emotional needs are met, that can often be one of the places she expresses herself.

As for the 2^nd highlight, ...I suppose that'd be exactly what the cheating woman would be doing, no?

True but I guess my point would be if you want something new then it is time to completely end the relationship and move on.  If your needs are being met somewhere else, why not just break up or divorce?  As far as needs being met emotionally first then sexually second, I guess I really don't know where women go to meet guys quickly except bars and clubs, but it seems that many I have known have looked for the sex.  Just my experience.

[gtbro1]

1^st A woman's emotional needs aren't met in the sack. But once her emotional needs are met, that can often be one of the places she expresses herself.

As for the 2^nd highlight, ...I suppose that'd be exactly what the cheating woman would be doing, no?

 I can't believe you are basically saying it is ok for a woman to cheat. ..or at least that the man is to blame.
 Many scumbag men use that same excuse..that they aren't getting it at home so they will look elsewhere. Still wrong.

 You know Jag...some women are just  sluts. simple as that. I would agree  that there are probably  more men who are scumbags than there are women...but sometimes,Jag, it isn't the man's fault.

[Lord Humungous]

It's better to cheat on your woman before she cheats on you..

HAHAHAHA cool!!

[Cap]

I can't believe you are basically saying it is ok for a woman to cheat. ..or at least that the man is to blame.
 Many scumbag men use that same excuse..that they aren't getting it at home so they will look elsewhere. Still wrong.

 You know Jag...some women are just  sluts. simple as that. I would agree  that there are probably  more men who are scumbags than there are women...but sometimes,Jag, it isn't the man's fault.

At the risk of sounding like an absent minded jerk, it's tough for me to understand a person feeling the need to cheat in a marriage.  More specifically (and I am sure women have their stories) I have heard about women dating/married to men in highly stressful jobs that require a lot of time and energy, the wife/gf feels neglected while the guy is out working and possibly providing for the wife and he ends up getting cheated on after all the hard work.  I can't tell you the number of stories I have heard from cops, fire fighters, business men and military men who have had this happen.  I understand the stressors for women but at the same time, what does that say about an individual's level of devotion?

[powerpack]

At the risk of sounding like an absent minded jerk, it's tough for me to understand a person feeling the need to cheat in a marriage.  More specifically (and I am sure women have their stories) I have heard about women dating/married to men in highly stressful jobs that require a lot of time and energy, the wife/gf feels neglected while the guy is out working and possibly providing for the wife and he ends up getting cheated on after all the hard work.  I can't tell you the number of stories I have heard from cops, fire fighters, business men and military men who have had this happen.  I understand the stressors for women but at the same time, what does that say about an individual's level of devotion?

True
When I had to do national service 23 years ago the majority of the guys had girl friends and a small few wives( 230 men in a company)
But by the time we had finished training nearly EVERY SINGLE GUY had received a dear Johnny.
Every 2 years I had to do 1 to 3 months military service and every single girl I had cheated on me some time during that period.
In the end I got so paranoid I actually dumped the woman I was with before my last army camp.

[Cap]

True
When I had to do national service 23 years ago the majority of the guys had girl friends and a small few wives( 230 men in a company)
But by the time we had finished training nearly EVERY SINGLE GUY had received a dear Johnny.
Every 2 years I had to do 1 to 3 months military service and every single girl I had cheated on me some time during that period.
In the end I got so paranoid I actually dumped the woman I was with before my last army camp.

Seriously though, what do these men have to do?  If I was in any of these professions, especially military I would just stay completely single and just have fun.  It's pretty bad when an individual can't do his/her job without worrying that they are neglecting their partner. 

[gtbro1]

How can a soldier defend his country when he is worried about defending his woman?

Makes ya wish they still had chastity belts.

but with my luck,my wife would cheat with a locksmith.

[Cap]

How can a soldier defend his country when he is worried about defending his woman?

Makes ya wish they still had chastity belts.

but with my luck,my wife would cheat with a locksmith.

Haha.  It's like a STA buddy once told me, "trust em with your life but not your money or your wife".  Honestly though, if you think about cheating outside of just the "screwing" realm, then you are talking about establishing another relationship completely.  If that is the case then just end the marriage, especially if you are actively looking for someone to fill that role of "partner".  Men cheat for dumb reasons too but screwing a new guy because he "listens" isn't really a good reason for me.

[gtbro1]

   screwing a new guy because he "listens" isn't really a good reason for me.

   If they are doing that, then I'm all ears. 

[24KT]

I can't believe you are basically saying it is ok for a woman to cheat.

  That wasn't what I was saying.

[Deadpool]

How can a soldier defend his country when he is worried about defending his woman?

Makes ya wish they still had chastity belts.

but with my luck,my wife would cheat with a locksmith.