The Four Types of Dog Vomit

[~flower~]

The Four Types of Dog Vomit

YELLOW URKA-GURKAS

Dog runs around the house and hides under furniture while making a prolonged
"uurka-guurka, uurka-guurka" noise (the only noise guaranteed to wake up a
dog lover who is hungover from a 3:30am post-dog-show celebration). After a
mad scramble to capture the dog and drag him outside, the episode ends with
an indelible line of slimy yellow froth from the living room rug to the back
door.

BLAP DISEASE

Dog exercises hard and

a) eats large mouthfuls of snow (winter blap disease) or

b) drinks a bucket of water (summer blap disease).

Within two minutes of returning inside the dog spews out large amounts of
clear, slimy liquid, making a distinctive "blap" sound and sharp percussive
noise as it hits the linoleum.


GARKS

Dog suddenly clears his throat with loud and dramatic "gggark, gggark"
noises, followed by a prolonged "iiksss" and then loud, satisfied smacking
noises. There is nothing on the rug. Don't investigate, you don't want to
know.

RALFS

Apropos of nothing, the dog strolls into the dining room and waits 'til the
innocent dinner guests are all watching him. Then, with a single deep
gut-wrenching "raaaallff", disgorges the entire week's contents of his
stomach on the rug. Variation: he eats it.

In all of the above events, the dog is entirely healthy and indeed, deeply
pleased with himself.

[Vet]

If some one would design an alarm clock with the sound of a dog puking instead of beeping or ringing I'd buy it in a heartbeat.  There is nothing on this planet that will drag me out of a deep sleep faster than the sound of a dog puking. 

[knny187]

how about a cat furr ball?

[MisterMagoo]

how about a cat furr ball?

rarer. you know what's worse? when you have an older cat and have to clean its asshole and crotch every four days with tissues because he's getting too old to properly clean himself. 

[Butterbean]

The Four Types of Dog Vomit

YELLOW URKA-GURKAS

Dog runs around the house and hides under furniture while making a prolonged
"uurka-guurka, uurka-guurka" noise (the only noise guaranteed to wake up a
dog lover who is hungover from a 3:30am post-dog-show celebration). After a
mad scramble to capture the dog and drag him outside, the episode ends with
an indelible line of slimy yellow froth from the living room rug to the back
door.

BLAP DISEASE

Dog exercises hard and

a) eats large mouthfuls of snow (winter blap disease) or

b) drinks a bucket of water (summer blap disease).

Within two minutes of returning inside the dog spews out large amounts of
clear, slimy liquid, making a distinctive "blap" sound and sharp percussive
noise as it hits the linoleum.


GARKS

Dog suddenly clears his throat with loud and dramatic "gggark, gggark"
noises, followed by a prolonged "iiksss" and then loud, satisfied smacking
noises. There is nothing on the rug. Don't investigate, you don't want to
know.

RALFS

Apropos of nothing, the dog strolls into the dining room and waits 'til the
innocent dinner guests are all watching him. Then, with a single deep
gut-wrenching "raaaallff", disgorges the entire week's contents of his
stomach on the rug. Variation: he eats it.

In all of the above events, the dog is entirely healthy and indeed, deeply
pleased with himself.

loloz

If some one would design an alarm clock with the sound of a dog puking instead of beeping or ringing I'd buy it in a heartbeat.  There is nothing on this planet that will drag me out of a deep sleep faster than the sound of a dog puking. 

hahaha you should invent it

how about a cat furr ball?

I remember my mom had a cat that puked up a fur ball.  We didn't know what it was at first...my mom thought it was a mouse or something.  I poked it and it kind of collapsed and I screamed.

[Princess L]

The Four Types of Dog Vomit

YELLOW URKA-GURKAS

Dog runs around the house and hides under furniture while making a prolonged
"uurka-guurka, uurka-guurka" noise (the only noise guaranteed to wake up a
dog lover who is hungover from a 3:30am post-dog-show celebration). After a
mad scramble to capture the dog and drag him outside, the episode ends with
an indelible line of slimy yellow froth from the living room rug to the back
door.

Why is that?

Scout always goes behind a big fake floor plant.  I usually don't find it until it's all hard and crusty 
If I do catch him, I just try to get a newspaper under him.