In what can only be labeled as a stunning yet entirely predictable turn of events, former Vice Presidential candidate and "chief common sense haver" Sarah Palin has stepped down from her new role as Fox News contributor - only minutes after inking the deal.
Not wanting to be labeled as a quitter, Palin was adamant that this was because she was duped by the "elitist liberal Ivy-league educated freedom haters" who didn't tell her that there wouldn't be phonetics on her teleprompter and that she was "being lured into doing fascist work behind a desk that freedom-loving Americans can understand why she wouldn't want to do".
Palin's deal, the details of which are still undisclosed, was rumored to include responsibilities such as "reading all of the newspapers that are put in front of her" and one segment was rumored to be shot on location at the MSNBC studios to capture Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow in the break rooms "palling around with terrorists and others who hate our freedoms and who don't see the value in freedom loving common sensors who just want to make sure that our way of life isn't threatened by those who want to do harm to it".
Word is that a disagreement over shortening the title of the above noted segment to something coherent left Palin storming out of the Fox offices yelling about the "biased high 'flutin' big words of over educated people who don't have real world free market experience and values that are similar to those that real America has".
