i've read so much on form, watched so many videos, i think my head is going to explode... i've tried everything everything in the book and then some. i suppose there's a possibility a coach could find something that slipped by my notice, but trust me when i say i know what a good deadlift looks like, and have spent an absurd amount of time worrying over every aspect of form. i, too, cringe whenever i see someone pull with a rounded back, etc.
i'm practically convinced, at this point, there's got to be something wrong with me. i've never even felt the slightest thing in my erectors or traps from doing deadlifts, good mornings, or sldls, for example. pretty much the only place i ever used to feel them was in my lats, and even that is a distant memory.
very strange, are you either really short or really tall or have weird proportions? i'm 6'3" and had to adapt my deadlift form into a more of a weird romanian hybrid to get the most out of them. but yeah you're right, for some people it just doesn't work. maybe try some other way to hit your erectors like back extensions? you just have to find out what's best for you i guess.
i agree that not all exercises are for everyone, some people swear by stuff like upright rows but i personally believe they do more harm than good in most cases.
*edit* something that might help others, what helped me get my deadlift form down better was visualizing and thinking of it as more of a "hip thrust" than a lift. with the glutes and hams doing most of the work and the erectors just being a in a rock-solid stabilizing position. for the lockout, don't lean back, once your head is in a neutral position above your feet, try to actively straighten out as if standing to attention, shoulders back and thrust into the bar while keeping your core consciously flexed, so that you can look down and clearly see your abs, crotch and feet under you.
