Issue Re: Gigantic Farts

[Var City]

They're so loud, they vibrate my room. I farted in the shower, then bumped into my neighbor (a descent bro) and asked him if he could hear my farts

and he told me he thought they were fake

i was tempted to kill him

So here is my dilemma: I am blowing one of these MASSIVE, room vibrating, earth quaking farts that are as loud as a porsche cayman GTS engine igniting every 2 minutes or so

and I have this girl coming over in 4 hours

she's one of the legit dimes i fuck

anyways they are starting to go away and get less loud (i shit my shorts when i woke up for example, and now i am just blowing loud bag pipes but there is no substance to them literally)

and this concerns me because the girl is going to be here in exactly 3 hours and 26 minutes

how do i get these farts "popping" again? i  need them louder than ever.

all get bigger advice is welcome and this is urgent

[funk51]

  this  looks like you need this guys advice.

[Var City]

You talk a lot about hoes but havnt posted 1 pic of them yet, just stfu

hey faggat!

how's working for team shredz?

you were outed in what, 50 posts? Get the FUCK out of my fart thread you cum slurping butt raper

and BTW you dumb dilapidated "mom I got cum in my eye again!" bitch :

i am BIGGER and leaner than ANY guy on your team. and i work in finance. and i've won competitions

and i've posted photos

you stupid ass motherfucking dick riding midget boy otter chasing "don't look children!" ugly PEON (you spanish faggat) pawn for team shredz

get the FUCK outta here. I'm FROM where you want to be from (NYC) but you're from westchesta you dick riding butt bandit zooophile.  you probably send booty PMs

now let's get back on topic

by the way guys, this "latin heat" faggat is offically a dumb ass mother fucker who needs to be put in his place all over this board

[Var City]

Post a pic then fagott and spare me the essays. I own my own supplement company broke bitch and my build also wipes the floor with yours

 hahaha. "home boy"

FUCK your supplement company

I work for one of the big four and you don't even know what that means because I went to to university then got my MBA and you didn't even manage your GED

Let's really not go the money route. you will walk away with a shit stained bloody asshole after i sodomize you faggat

and haha your build wipes floor with mine?

you're simply not smoof. physique wise. and as for a wordsmith, you're certainly no foozle. i'm both. so shut the fuck up. nobody on this site touches me except big ro in fact physique wise

AND GO FIND MY PICTURE THREAD BITCH. i'm not uploading that shit through that tiny pic website then posting it so you can jerk off and then not post a picture back

psht. you're the trainer 2.0 except dumber

i'm a snow leopard on top of a mountain. you're a kitten dying of starvation in a hut

[Var City]

this  looks like you need this guys advice.

i'm scared to go near him he may blow me away

i bet his farts are so massive he has to sleep on his stomach and he still knocked his roof off that one time

[Var City]

Another wall of text and no proof of any claims. Just stfu gimmick fag lol

looks like i have your attention (:

read your posts out loud before you type. you sound like you never made it past the 8th grade.

by the way, how many cocks have you sucked on a scale from 1-1,000?

be honest now. you've sucked dick before. i know you have

[Ronnie Rep]

Var you're a funny fucker, your posts read like a verbal roid rage assault.

[BigRo]

So you actually want to fart louder when she comes over? 

[_aj_]

So you actually want to fart louder when she comes over? 

It's best to let the subtle poetry of these posts wash over you without too much contemplation.

[Var City]

It's best to let the subtle poetry of these posts wash over you without too much contemplation.

finally. someone understand me.

i'm like the anti anabolic halo

what i was obviously asking for was a solution to make the farts STOP

it was a little joke in the end about making the farts louder

PS all that really did happen with my neighbor and him thinking they were fake

yesterday was my cheat day i ate

6 eggs and a pint of ben and jerrys for breakfast with white toast

milk shake on the road to beach

did some pushups and pullups on the board walk before i went to hit on girls even though i was with some girl. she gets me though and she knows when she looks in my eyes that I KNOW that SHE KNOWS.

ate chipotle on the way back to the house then cooked up ravioli with lots of steak and shrimp stir fry no joke 30 oz of steak i kicked the girl away by then

ordered a large pizza half peppersoni half hawaiin at 10pm ate the whole thing

ate a few ice cream bars and a bag of pretzels

u can say i just carb loaded. and i took yesterday off clen too so today i am fucking revved up (i am one of the few that loves clen and takes it despite being lean wheneever off tren, which means for like 3 months of the year. i have asthma i think. it's medicinal.)

i woke uptoday and shit my shorts a bit when i farted

then dropped the smelliest deuce in the world, it looked like something a human could NEVER produce. it was at least 2 feet long.

then i took another 18 incheer about 2 cups of coffe later today . and i'm b ack to my normal diet today but hte farts man THE FARTS

and the clock is ticking

the whore is nearing

confetti WILL fall from the sky

the crowd will go wild

i told her we can play super mario kart on the N64. because i saw an N64 in one of her tinder photos... i've fucked this one before but only at her house. well i have a little surprise. there is no N64 and i am not entirely sure of what that is because i go to work and i go to the gym and i brutally fuck bitches nightly and i do too much cocaine in all honesty. so i don't do the video gamez.

[HavoX]

Get the FUCK out of my fart thread

Hahaha

[Powerlift66]

They're so loud, they vibrate my room. I farted in the shower, then bumped into my neighbor (a descent bro) and asked him if he could hear my farts

and he told me he thought they were fake

i was tempted to kill him

So here is my dilemma: I am blowing one of these MASSIVE, room vibrating, earth quaking farts that are as loud as a porsche cayman GTS engine igniting every 2 minutes or so

and I have this girl coming over in 4 hours

she's one of the legit dimes i fuck

anyways they are starting to go away and get less loud (i shit my shorts when i woke up for example, and now i am just blowing loud bag pipes but there is no substance to them literally)

and this concerns me because the girl is going to be here in exactly 3 hours and 26 minutes

how do i get these farts "popping" again? i  need them louder than ever.

all get bigger advice is welcome and this is urgent

LMAO... Best poster these days (var city), too damn funny....