What's the deal with Work Friends?

[dj181]

what's a friend 

[wes]

Fuck friends........all they do is bring their drama to your doorstep.

[Earl1972]

true work friends are rare

your work "friends" probably just relate with you through hating the boss, hating other coworkers, or using you for the latest workplace gossip

not really a good relationship if your common interests revolve around negativity

if one of you leave the job you no longer have those things in common because you won't care to hear how much they hate their new boss and coworkers

many would throw you under the bus for a promotion or to save their own job

also if it was a job they hate they might want to erase all reminders of that job and leaving everything in the rear view mirror, which means cutting you out of their life

E

[Dave D]

This is interesting. Actually, it seems a bit odd that you don't have at least one good buddy to hang with. Perhaps you are a loner at heart.

I'm friendly with pretty much everyone. There are a few close friends that I've known for decades. I don't have childhood friends, probably because I moved a lot with my parents. The few high school friends I had, have drifted away. This is largely due to the fact that we had almost nothing in common once we became adults.

Prime youre the best.

Offering advice, analysis of behavior and how it all relates to you.

Classic.

[dj181]

Fuck friends........all they do is bring their drama to your doorstep.

not sure if they bring drama, but they usually dont give you what you want when you want it, so..... FUCK THEM

[Tapeworm]

The deal?  You're livin' in the past, man!

[8 INCH not biceps]

OP what I suggest you do is go to a gay club and go up to guys and say hi will you be my friend I guarantee you will have plenty of friends by the end of the night, you might end up with a sore butthole but hey nothing in life is free.

[MAXX]

The deal?  You're livin' in the past, man!

meanwhile...


Seinfeld references in 2017

[Tapeworm]

I'm feeling very meta today.

[BodyMachine]

No friends in engineering. Most are bizarre anyway. It's a tough career socially

[Chadwick The Beta]

Similar situation exists with school friends.  Personally, the only friendships I've maintained long term are those friends I made in military service.

[El Diablo Blanco]

OP what I suggest you do is go to a gay club and go up to guys and say hi will you be my friend I guarantee you will have plenty of friends by the end of the night, you might end up with a sore butthole but hey nothing in life is free.

I'll try that this Saturday.  Thanks for the advice.

[Bossa]

I think a lot of times people mistake acquaintances for friends.  As stated previously true friends are rare indeed while we all make many acquaintances throughout our lifetimes.  Of course these people are interchangeable depending on circumstances at the time such as where you work.    A perfect example would be the buddies you like to go to a club with because you always have a great time pick up women etc but then once you get in a relationship that good time charlie is someone you no longer have very much in common with. 

[Skorp1o]

You need common ground outside of work.

I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.

On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.

[El Diablo Blanco]

You need common ground outside of work.

I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.

On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.

I find maintaining friendships with young children hard as well.

[ESFitness]

I'll hang out with girls... But dudes? Nah.

[mazrim]

It's just like internet forums.

In my case, I chalk it up to THEM not wanting to meet me.

Duh.

Seem very bitter about that with the emphasis on "THEM".

You are weird.

[Victor Venice Beach]

You need common ground outside of work.

I've met people I've had a lot in common with at work and here we are many years later still meet up when the chance arises and chat on and off on whatsapp. One example is a guy who used to juice, into training and likes whores and watches...and we had a very similar dark sense of humour. But I too have made friends that only lasted whilst work lasted...guess it was the strongest link and common ground in our friendship, when that ended the relationship expired too. Find people who are truly similar to you and it will last.

On another note, I find friendships with married men who have young children harder to maintain, those guys have Very consuming lives and hardly any space for external distractions, it's virtually impossible for them to make new friends.

This is true. I am one of them. It is hard to expand the circle, let alone maintain it.

[El Diablo Blanco]

Friends in general change.  I had childhood friends from Elementary right through college. Same group of guys.  We'd keep in touch pretty often, meet up pretty often but like a sniper in a tree one by one they fell to marriage and family and just stopped staying in contact.  Once in a while I'd travel back to my hometown where they ALL still live, other than me no one else left.  they befriended the next generation that came after us and just seem to not have moved on with their lives.  Strange being in mid 30's at your friends house with his 20 year old friends hanging out.  You realize you have lost all that you had in common, come back home and try to start over making friends that were as close as your old ones but it's real hard to do when you're an adult.  That bond you had cannot be replicated anymore. That simplistic view of the world we once had made it easy to find commonalities but as life gets more complicated and issues broader that gap widens and you realize you have a lot less in common.

[light weight baby]

Duh.

Seem very bitter about that with the emphasis on "THEM".

You are weird.

he keeps repeating his life story over and over too about how he competed and did pretty well despite only using a little gear but having no regrets and his wife is a vice president of goldman sachs and how he has several (two) rental properties and a phd in physics overall he's pretty satisfied