I'm willing to ignore your excessive marijuana usage but please engage in such things indoors from now on so I may remain blissfully ignorant of your trashy behavior and continue to think of you as an angel unspoiled by worldly things.. including Robert Pattinson's penis.
On to other matters.. I find it very disturbing that since we cannot be together (regardless of the fact that I would probably dislike you greatly if I ever actually met you) you have failed to provide any naky pics for men such as myself. I have yet to run across even a good picture of you in a bikini and I find this unacceptable. I have quite the imagination so it wouldn't take much of an effort on your part.
I look forward to you fixing these very serious issues as soon as possible.
Warmest regards,
Dan
PS. Your acting is really not that good, another glaring blemish on your public image. I will forgive you but only if you bone Taylor Lautner in addition to Robert since I think Taylor is more deserving and I find it easier to live vicariously through him versus that glossly English grease monkey. Taylor Swift be damned.. Jacob needs to win sometimes too!!!
