I guess the question is now "What are the best and worst martial arts for streetfighting against washed up MMA fighters who need money or redneck MMA fans?"
All of that MMA bullshit doesn't work outside of TV. Even most basic punches you see in boxing and mma won't be that great because you don't have your fist taped up. You'll bust your hand. What good are submission holds or grappling if there isn't a ref to call the fight? They leave you completely vulnerable to anyone else as well. How are you going to do your widdle leg kicks if the guy you are fighting has a friend behind you who pulls down your pants? Put someone in a submission hold and watch them grab a rock on the ground and break your hand or watch them pull a knife from their pocket and stab you.
If you want to know what really works, here's what I would recommend. Quickly shit your pants and pull out the turd. Hold it up like it's a bomb about to go off. That's it, fights over.