Since no getbigger asked, I figured it important I post my workout.
Fueled by 3 scrambled eggs and a couple Eggo waffles, I headed to the gym at 6 pm.
I wore my black bear hiking t-shirt with my tattered 1980's K-Mart gym shorts.
To honor IFBB pro Evan Cent-o-panty , I wore black socks.
As I strode across the gym I noticed how the babes were eyeing my crotch.
I had an obvious piss stain from a semi- botched shot at the urinal, but wtf, they looked.
I avoided their flirty looks , as I had serious lifting to do.
I headed straight to the Life Fitness Leg extension.
I did 2 warm up sets and then a triple drop set.
210 lbs for 10, quickly change to 195 and did 6 more, then dropped to 160 and did the final 8 reps.
The last few reps were tough and I grunted like a wildebeest in heat.
My quads were torched but I'd just started.
Like a true 5%'er I penguin waddled to the Hammer hack squat.
Some skinny geek ( aka lean and fit) was just completing his set.
I worked my way up to 5 plates per side and eeked out 9 full epic reps.
That was quite impressive and I could have stopped, but I didn't.
I needed motivation, so I watched a Ricky Piano 5% Youtube video on my cell phone.
Since I'm broke and can't afford much, I used a magic marker to write 5% on my water bottle.
I took a swig , took off 1 plate and did another set of 10 full reps.
Right after that last rep, I farted loudly and held up 5 fingers , so everyone knew who I was .
I don't have fancy Beats head phones. I got some vintage , white ones from Radio Shack.
To modernize 'em , I wrote 5% on each ear flap with the magic marker.
I cranked up " Disco Inferno" and headed over by the power rack.
I set the step attachment , grabbed a 50 lb DB and did 16 step up lunges with each leg.
I was fried and my quads were on fire now. Damn, those step ups pumped my glutes.
Exhausted and panting, I laid on the floor. Some trainer asked me if I was ok.
I looked up, wiped off some drool and said ; " I just pumped my ass cheeks. You should try it "
