I nominate my 89 yr old father-in law , for honorary get-bigger

[Howard]

My wife's dad has got to be an old get-bigger.
In his early 80's he started being "out of it" so my wife's family put him a nursing home.
He got kicked out of the first two.

1. Within 90 days of residing in his 1st home he hooked up
with a senile old lady resident. The LPN found them naked in bed.
When asked he said ; " I wanted pussy and she wanted dick, so I gave it to her good."

result- kicked out of home

2. Within a few weeks of moving into his next nursing home, he was kicked out again.
He must have liked this Latina LPN with a big ass.
Every time she tended to him, he tried to grab her and constantly repeated;
" C'mon sweety, wash my lil' soldier."

3. My wife's female friend took him out for a drive and ice cream.
On the way home she said he asked ;

" I don't know if you're interested, but when we get back , would you like to come in and have sex?"

She smiled and politely turned him down.
So he came back with ; " That's too bad , it would have been good."

4. My wife asked him , what would he look for in a woman if he got married again.
" Well dear, for starters, she's got to be fukable"  

He's also a Korean war vet and was in one of the units that went to Nevada
to see a tactical nuke test, down in a trench ( circa early 1950's).

I'm biased , but even old and half in the bag, he's got the get-bigger attitude .

[Skeeter]

My wife's dad has got to be an old get-bigger.
In his early 80's he started being "out of it" so my wife's family put him a nursing home.
He got kicked out of the first two.

1. Within 90 days of residing in his 1st home he hooked up
with a senile old lady resident. The LPN found them naked in bed.
When asked he said ; " I wanted pussy and she wanted dick, so I gave it to her good."

result- kicked out of home

2. Within a few weeks of moving into his next nursing home, he was kicked out again.
He must have liked this Latina LPN with a big ass.
Every time she tended to him, he tried to grab her and constantly repeated;
" C'mon sweety, wash my lil' soldier."

3. My wife's female friend took him out for a drive and ice cream.
On the way home she said he asked ;

" I don't know if you're interested, but when we get back , would you like to come in and have sex?"

She smiled and politely turned him down.
So he came back with ; " That's too bad , it would have been good."

4. My wife asked him , what would he look for in a woman if he got married again.
" Well dear, for starters, she's got to be fukable"  

He's also a Korean war vet and was in one of the units that went to Nevada
to see a tactical nuke test, down in a trench ( circa early 1950's).

I'm biased , but even old and half in the bag, he's got the get-bigger attitude .

[NelsonMuntz]

My wife's dad has got to be an old get-bigger.
In his early 80's he started being "out of it" so my wife's family put him a nursing home.
He got kicked out of the first two.

1. Within 90 days of residing in his 1st home he hooked up
with a senile old lady resident. The LPN found them naked in bed.
When asked he said ; " I wanted pussy and she wanted dick, so I gave it to her good."

result- kicked out of home

2. Within a few weeks of moving into his next nursing home, he was kicked out again.
He must have liked this Latina LPN with a big ass.
Every time she tended to him, he tried to grab her and constantly repeated;
" C'mon sweety, wash my lil' soldier."

3. My wife's female friend took him out for a drive and ice cream.
On the way home she said he asked ;

" I don't know if you're interested, but when we get back , would you like to come in and have sex?"

She smiled and politely turned him down.
So he came back with ; " That's too bad , it would have been good."

4. My wife asked him , what would he look for in a woman if he got married again.
" Well dear, for starters, she's got to be fukable"  

He's also a Korean war vet and was in one of the units that went to Nevada
to see a tactical nuke test, down in a trench ( circa early 1950's).

I'm biased , but even old and half in the bag, he's got the get-bigger attitude .

Congrats Howard, your first good quality funny post, only took 11210 to get there

[Henda]

Sounds like a fine elderly gentleman better suited to frequenting our local working mans club rather than a care home

[Howard]

Sounds like a fine elderly gentleman better suited to frequenting our local working mans club rather than a care home

I seriously considered taking him to a strip club a couple years ago.
He wears a Depends and has bathroom issues, so I didn't want to risk it.

Plus, he's got some dementia and is out of it, half the time.

For example, my wife was walking from the car to get something.
He was seated in the passenger seat and said ;
"Look at the ass on that one."

I laughed and said ; " Bob, that's your daughter, Beth ."

He got red faced, looked embarrassed and mumbled; " Ooooohhhh."

[mass243]

Haha
Some men are alpha and never stop being one.

[NelsonMuntz]

I seriously considered taking him to a strip club a couple years ago.
He wears a Depends and has bathroom issues, so I didn't want to risk it.

Plus, he's got some dementia and is out of it, half the time.

For example, my wife was walking from the car to get something.
He was seated in the passenger seat and said ;
"Look at the ass on that one."

I laughed and said ; " Bob, that's your daughter, Beth ."

He got red faced, looked embarrassed and mumbled; " Ooooohhhh."

one of my dad's girlfriend's from years ago...her dad who was like in his 70's- early 80's was heard saying that in his next like he wanted to come back as a sponge in a woman's shower

[Howard]

one of my dad's girlfriend's from years ago...her dad who was like in his 70's- early 80's was heard saying that in his next like he wanted to come back as a sponge in a woman's shower

When you get old , you get unfiltered and don't give a fuk