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Author Topic: Klaus Doring - Biggest Bodybuilder  (Read 66177 times)

Bluto

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #250 on: January 12, 2008, 04:02:47 PM »
bump for beer, bigtittied german women and klaus doring.

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_bruce_

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #251 on: January 15, 2008, 06:11:58 AM »
Just found this in an old Time-magazine from the 80ies...


Further little known facts about "Das Ueberfreak(TM)"...

- Klaus started benchpressing at the mere age of 4 - the weightset: his mother's lofty tits
- even in preschool he was notorious for breaking up fights among 8th graders - this talent led him to later become a world-renowned bouncer
- at age  8 he already bedded strippers in the double digits
- at age 10 he visited the Dalai Lhama to gain further information on his favorite movie - the karate kid
- at age 12 he slept 72h a day to grow some more
- at age 14 he had his own brand of beer - the "Klausthaler"
- at age 16 he was a feverish student at the university of Heineken. On his second day there he already had his master thesis complete - it got refused due to being 400 pages long only consisting of one sentence
- at age 18 he bitch-slapped Bruce Lee - a historical moment that later would be quoted in history books as "Yellow Meltdown"

Further facts about Klaus are kept secret - in Germany these papers are called the "Klaus-files" - writings shrouded in mystery.

Did you know that...
...Klaus is a fluent speaker and partial-reader of 2 languages -> east and west german.
...the berlin wall finally crumbled when Doring took a walk and "a strange formation of stone" blocked his path
...Klaus was voted "Man of the year" countless times by Enron-magazine.
...his favorite computer game is "Oil's well" on the C64
...his favorite song "Die for oil"
...in '77 he donated a quarterinch of his left bicep to help restabilize oil-prices worldwide
...he saved the lifes of 3000 homeless children via granting them shelter under is gargantuan manhood



Take home message:
"Don't ask what Klaus can do for you - ask what you can do for Klaus!"*


*this phrase was later stolen by JFK and adapted to enslave a whole country. To this day Klaus is apalled at the mere thought of using one of his magical love-quotes to gain political momentum.

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Playboy

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #252 on: January 15, 2008, 06:22:37 AM »
Quote from: Bluto on January 11, 2008, 03:13:05 PM
Discuss this behemoth.
Klaus Doring = 1 oil change every 5,000 lifts.
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ironneck

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #253 on: January 15, 2008, 06:33:28 AM »
he died in a car accident last night after a clubbing-tour with his friends Franz Schmidt and Hans Meyer(both jsut as freaky as klaus)

again...he was in a drunken mood as he drove...


R.I.P. KLAUS
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slaveboy1980

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #254 on: January 15, 2008, 06:50:47 AM »
Quote from: Bluto on January 11, 2008, 03:13:05 PM
Discuss this behemoth.

boring. sans boring.
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_bruce_

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #255 on: January 15, 2008, 10:21:51 AM »
Quote from: Playboy on January 15, 2008, 06:22:37 AM
Klaus Doring = 1 oil change every 5,000 lifts.

Don't hate the player hate the game  :)
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Bluto

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #256 on: January 15, 2008, 10:35:23 AM »
klaus.

doring.

TEAM KLAUS
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affeman

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #257 on: January 15, 2008, 10:51:43 AM »
Quote from: _bruce_ on January 15, 2008, 06:11:58 AM
Just found this in an old Time-magazine from the 80ies...


Further little known facts about "Das Ueberfreak(TM)"...

- Klaus started benchpressing at the mere age of 4 - the weightset: his mother's lofty tits
- even in preschool he was notorious for breaking up fights among 8th graders - this talent led him to later become a world-renowned bouncer
- at age  8 he already bedded strippers in the double digits
- at age 10 he visited the Dalai Lhama to gain further information on his favorite movie - the karate kid
- at age 12 he slept 72h a day to grow some more
- at age 14 he had his own brand of beer - the "Klausthaler"
- at age 16 he was a feverish student at the university of Heineken. On his second day there he already had his master thesis complete - it got refused due to being 400 pages long only consisting of one sentence
- at age 18 he bitch-slapped Bruce Lee - a historical moment that later would be quoted in history books as "Yellow Meltdown"

Further facts about Klaus are kept secret - in Germany these papers are called the "Klaus-files" - writings shrouded in mystery.

Did you know that...
...Klaus is a fluent speaker and partial-reader of 2 languages -> east and west german.
...the berlin wall finally crumbled when Doring took a walk and "a strange formation of stone" blocked his path
...Klaus was voted "Man of the year" countless times by Enron-magazine.
...his favorite computer game is "Oil's well" on the C64
...his favorite song "Die for oil"
...in '77 he donated a quarterinch of his left bicep to help restabilize oil-prices worldwide
...he saved the lifes of 3000 homeless children via granting them shelter under is gargantuan manhood



Take home message:
"Don't ask what Klaus can do for you - ask what you can do for Klaus!"*


*this phrase was later stolen by JFK and adapted to enslave a whole country. To this day Klaus is apalled at the mere thought of using one of his magical love-quotes to gain political momentum.



HAHA, better than the Chuck Norris facts. ;D The Klaus Doring facts will conquer the web within a few days. :D
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affeman

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #258 on: January 15, 2008, 10:52:51 AM »
Quote from: ironneck on January 15, 2008, 06:33:28 AM
he died in a car accident last night after a clubbing-tour with his friends Franz Schmidt and Hans Meyer(both jsut as freaky as klaus)

again...he was in a drunken mood as he drove...


R.I.P. KLAUS

Do you know which town Döring comes from, Ironneck??
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Playboy

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #259 on: January 15, 2008, 11:12:11 AM »
Quote from: _bruce_ on January 15, 2008, 10:21:51 AM
Don't hate the player hate the game  :)
There is also a sensible way to use gear without deforming your body.  :-\
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ironneck

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #260 on: January 15, 2008, 11:53:11 AM »
Quote from: affeman on January 15, 2008, 10:52:51 AM
Do you know which town Döring comes from, Ironneck??


no but i know where klaus klaak lives...you know him? the synthol grandpa?he lives in goch,in a town near me
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_bruce_

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #261 on: January 15, 2008, 12:15:28 PM »
Quote from: Playboy on January 15, 2008, 11:12:11 AM
There is also a sensible way to use gear without deforming your body.  :-\

You just don't understand - the mindset of a winner is way beyond your grasp.

! Klaus "All or Nothing" Doring !  :o
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affeman

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #262 on: January 15, 2008, 01:19:47 PM »
Quote from: ironneck on January 15, 2008, 11:53:11 AM

no but i know where klaus klaak lives...you know him? the synthol grandpa?he lives in goch,in a town near me

This dude? :D

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Bluto

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #263 on: January 15, 2008, 01:25:57 PM »
Quote from: affeman on January 15, 2008, 01:19:47 PM
This dude? :D



those arms are fuckin huge !!!
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ironneck

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #264 on: January 15, 2008, 01:27:52 PM »
Quote from: affeman on January 15, 2008, 01:19:47 PM
This dude? :D





yes i talked to him several times...you know he is a nice guy but :-\
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Bluto

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Re: Doring. Klaus Doring.
« Reply #265 on: January 15, 2008, 01:30:32 PM »
those arms are huge!!!
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Fallsview

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #266 on: November 30, 2017, 03:46:16 AM »
It's December first....It is the Official Month Of Klaus Doring. One of the biggest, strongest bodybuilders of all time. Klaus is a wonderful person, very kind and gentle. So in honour of Klaus...December will always be his month.

Anyone have updates on what he is up to? The interwebs seem quiet on his whereabouts?





STAY POSTIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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dantelis

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #267 on: December 16, 2017, 03:03:49 PM »
Quote from: Fallsview on November 30, 2017, 03:46:16 AM
It's December first....It is the Official Month Of Klaus Doring. One of the biggest, strongest bodybuilders of all time. Klaus is a wonderful person, very kind and gentle. So in honour of Klaus...December will always be his month.

Anyone have updates on what he is up to? The interwebs seem quiet on his whereabouts?





STAY POSTIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think he exploded

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MONSTER_TRICEPS

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #268 on: December 18, 2017, 02:15:35 PM »
The sheer mass in combination with divine aesthetics is what defines this true athlete. In the morning I drink a nice espresso ground from Guatemalan coffee beans (ofourse produced with child labor) in my 300cm^3 Klaus Doring signature cup, and I know it is going to be a good day.

EIN KLAUS, EIN REICH
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tom joad

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #269 on: December 18, 2017, 02:45:35 PM »
Quote from: Mars on December 03, 2007, 07:46:12 AM
incredible mass, never seen someone close to him size wise.

not only that, Mars, but mass with class.
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ratherbebig

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #270 on: December 18, 2017, 02:47:29 PM »
is that dude still around?
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Dave D

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Re: In honor of December, Klaus Doring month...
« Reply #271 on: December 18, 2017, 04:23:34 PM »
Not that we can celebrate das uber freak to much but according to the getbig archives:

Klausmas is an August holiday
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tom joad

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Re: skinny geek comparing his arm to the great klaus doring!!!
« Reply #272 on: December 18, 2017, 05:31:25 PM »
Quote from: Mars on August 24, 2007, 06:31:10 AM
cutler is a little bitch compared to Klaus.
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Vince G, CSN MFT

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FOUND A RECENT PICTURE OF KLAUS DORING!!!! MY CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR YOU!!
« Reply #273 on: December 24, 2017, 11:08:22 PM »
Merry Christmas everyone.


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Ted SuperSet

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Re: FOUND A RECENT PICTURE OF KLAUS DORING!!!! MY CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR YOU!!
« Reply #274 on: December 24, 2017, 11:40:05 PM »
Quote from: Vince G, CSN MFT on December 24, 2017, 11:08:22 PM
Merry Christmas everyone.




Merry xmas claus!
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