Avoiding family on thanksgiving

[webcake]

Don't think so. Worked fine up until a week or so ago. Other posters are having trouble too.....

[outby43]

Don't think so. Worked fine up until a week or so ago. Other posters are having trouble too.....

you using firefox or IE

[webcake]

IE..........weird that i'm not the only one it isn't working for. Weird......all the way weird.

[kyomu]

see, our problem is that we have a difference in Religion

I think i'm a God and they don't

YOU ARE A GREAT TAOIST AND BUDIST AND SHINTOIST!!
IF YOU SAY NO. EVEN MORE!!

[ManBearPig...]

a member of my wife's family has some colon problems.

thanksgiving dinner + colon problems + him ripping ass every 20 seconds for an hour+ surrounded by inlaws = shitty thanksgiving (no pun intended).

[johnnynoname]

YOU ARE A GREAT TAOIST AND BUDIST AND SHINTOIST!!
IF YOU SAY NO. EVEN MORE!!

i did read and enjoy the "Tao Te Ching"

[myt1]

I'll never understand people feeling like they have to visit their bitchy mother in law or family members that are assholes even if it's their parents. If they make you feel shitty or unwelcome fuck the scum. Life's to short for that shit. I choose to spend my time with people who care about me and like me for me.

x2 all the way!

My parents kicked me out at 18.  We argued a lot, but the only thing I ever did that caused them grief was got a couple of MIP's.   For that I was told by my father growing up that it wasn't his job to love me, and that when I turned 18 he didn't care if I lived in my car or by a dumpster.....just get out.  He was also classy enough to threaten not to come to his mother's funeral while I had taken off work and been out of state helping my uncle with funeral arrangements for a week.  All the way role model right there.  I've tried making it work, feeling like I had an obligation since they were my parents but after the funeral thing that was it.  Haven't spoken to them for two years, and doubt I ever will again.   I totally understand where you are coming from.  The times I tried and would go home for the holidays I felt like it was the first time in "their" home as though I'd never lived there.  I feel so much better having not gone around them for awhile.  The only thing I hate is when people ask you what are you doing/ how was your holiday and you feel like you have to fake it, cuz it's non of their business to have to explain it all.

[Chevron427]

Ok, so all of us dread family on this holiday and do whatever we can to avoid them.  What are your reason's for not wanting to spend time with your family? 

Your insecure and or homsexual

[chadstallion]

Ok, so all of us dread family on this holiday and do whatever we can to avoid them.  What are your reason's for not wanting to spend time with your family? 

they interfere with my sex life
and writing posts here
[although it has started a budding bromance with 333386]

[calfzilla]

x2 all the way!

My parents kicked me out at 18.  We argued a lot, but the only thing I ever did that caused them grief was got a couple of MIP's.   For that I was told by my father growing up that it wasn't his job to love me, and that when I turned 18 he didn't care if I lived in my car or by a dumpster.....just get out.  He was also classy enough to threaten not to come to his mother's funeral while I had taken off work and been out of state helping my uncle with funeral arrangements for a week.  All the way role model right there.  I've tried making it work, feeling like I had an obligation since they were my parents but after the funeral thing that was it.  Haven't spoken to them for two years, and doubt I ever will again.   I totally understand where you are coming from.  The times I tried and would go home for the holidays I felt like it was the first time in "their" home as though I'd never lived there.  I feel so much better having not gone around them for awhile.  The only thing I hate is when people ask you what are you doing/ how was your holiday and you feel like you have to fake it, cuz it's non of their business to have to explain it all.

Good post man.  Lots of honesty.  I agree, just because someone is your parent by blood don't mean shit.  They need to act the part or else you should just have nothing to do with them. 

[Luv2Hurt]

Yeah, I don't understand that.  I would never date a girl with kids from another guy, especially 3!      Maybe I am just immature, but that is my policy and I have no intentions on changing that.  F**k raising another man's kid.  You must be a real good man cross. 

I know.  I find myself in a similar perdicament, hard choices if you like the girl.  I just cant see with all the drama it being worth it.

[calfzilla]

I know.  I find myself in a similar perdicament, hard choices if you like the girl.  I just cant see with all the drama it being worth it.

I'm sure it's not.  Wise up bro, there is other pussy out there; pussy that hasn't shot out an 8lb ham. 

[Tapeworm]

I like my folks.  And goddamn! mom can cook.  Wish I'd had Thanksgiving with them this year. 

[mass 04]

a member of my wife's family has some colon problems.

thanksgiving dinner + colon problems + him ripping ass every 20 seconds for an hour+ surrounded by inlaws = shitty thanksgiving (no pun intended).

I doubt he would have colon problems if you could keep your penis out of there "PowerManBear".

[Luv2Hurt]

I'm sure it's not.  Wise up bro, there is other pussy out there; pussy that hasn't shot out an 8lb ham. 

LOL yeah good points, her 8lb hams did not come out through the pussy though so thats still intact.  When you really like a person for more than the pussy it does make the decision harder though. I agree with lots of the things you said on this and yes raising another dudes kids is much different and more frustrating than raising your own.  Just way too much BS to deal with IMO.  With your own offspring things are natural and you can parent them how you see fit, plus they are your kids, you made them, not some other asshole.  You will be much more tolerant of your own children when they are PITA which is most of the time from what i have observed.

[G o a t b o y]

read the G and O forum the last year- that will explain why i don't really want to see my family ( and vice versa)

What, they can't stand the fact they have a metrosexual fruitloop as a son?

[uberman09]

LOL yeah good points, her 8lb hams did not come out through the pussy though so thats still intact.  When you really like a person for more than the pussy it does make the decision harder though. I agree with lots of the things you said on this and yes raising another dudes kids is much different and more frustrating than raising your own.  Just way too much BS to deal with IMO.  With your own offspring things are natural and you can parent them how you see fit, plus they are your kids, you made them, not some other asshole.  You will be much more tolerant of your own children when they are PITA which is most of the time from what i have observed.

you will get rejected by the kid and you will reject him and basically you ll both be fighting for the mother as he grow up. She may prefer her kid instead of you, or the oposite, but all in all it's years of nonsensical drama.  Have your own kids... raising someone's else son or daughter = epic fail in the end, especially nowadays. He's never ever going to consider you his legitimate father and you re never ever going to consider him your legitimate son.

[Luv2Hurt]

you will get rejected by the kid and you will reject him and basically you ll both be fighting for the mother as he grow up. She may prefer her kid instead of you, or the oposite, but all in all it's years of nonsensical drama.  Have your own kids... raising someone's else son or daughter = epic fail in the end, especially nowadays. He's never ever going to consider you his legitimate father and you re never ever going to consider him your legitimate son.

Yes all good points to consider and they happen all the time.  Now that Im older I think its just as important to look at the chances of something working out long run before you get in too deep.  Like someone said you just dont hook up with someone long term and hope "love" will get you through and make things worthwhile, thats in the movies and fairytales. As someone said the playing field should be more even for both people to get any satisfaction out of it. Thanks.

[myt1]

Yes all good points to consider and they happen all the time.  Now that Im older I think its just as important to look at the chances of something working out long run before you get in too deep.  Like someone said you just dont hook up with someone long term and hope "love" will get you through and make things worthwhile, thats in the movies and fairytales. As someone said the playing field should be more even for both people to get any satisfaction out of it. Thanks.

On the flip side I've got a friend that met a girl as her marriage was falling apart with two kids.  He was 40 and she was 28.  Pretty much all the components for failure.  The kids love him to death and he'd do anything for them as well.  They had a son together about 7 years ago, and while you can tell there's a different bond there (of course) you never see him treat them any different.  They've been happily married for 10 years now so you never know.  My point is I wouldn't take too much advice from people on this site as a lot of them are very young, and still caught up in playing the macho pussy magnet card.  The only thing I would say is that if she has three kids already, you need to look at how many of your own you'd like to have.  Is she willing to have that many more?  Can you afford to support that many should the two of you get married?  You can't buy things for only the kids you have together or the entire family will be fucked up beyond belief.  Just my $.02

[pellius]

you will get rejected by the kid and you will reject him and basically you ll both be fighting for the mother as he grow up. She may prefer her kid instead of you, or the oposite, but all in all it's years of nonsensical drama.  Have your own kids... raising someone's else son or daughter = epic fail in the end, especially nowadays. He's never ever going to consider you his legitimate father and you re never ever going to consider him your legitimate son.

All true, but my personal experience, and observing those of others, is that the women will always put the child first. This may be partly to ease the pain or just be sensitive to how a child will feel from having another man on the scene or whatever but it's not a good situation. Also, don't forget the biological father. If he's always looming on the scene it just adds another obstacle to the situation. And not a small one.

Of course, if she doesn't give a crap about her kid's feelings and her ex wants nothing to do with his child then she's probably a POS character wise and again it's a lose-lose situation.

I'm sure there are exceptions but it's an uphill battle.

[Luv2Hurt]

On the flip side I've got a friend that met a girl as her marriage was falling apart with two kids.  He was 40 and she was 28.  Pretty much all the components for failure.  The kids love him to death and he'd do anything for them as well.  They had a son together about 7 years ago, and while you can tell there's a different bond there (of course) you never see him treat them any different.  They've been happily married for 10 years now so you never know.  My point is I wouldn't take too much advice from people on this site as a lot of them are very young, and still caught up in playing the macho pussy magnet card.  The only thing I would say is that if she has three kids already, you need to look at how many of your own you'd like to have.  Is she willing to have that many more?  Can you afford to support that many should the two of you get married?  You can't buy things for only the kids you have together or the entire family will be fucked up beyond belief.  Just my $.02

Yes good point and I have considered it could be rewarding in some areas.  Im 46 though and she (44) can not have any more kids so i will never have my own if I stay with her.  Agree if I could add one or two of my own into the mix it might be different.  She has 2 kids both under 7 years old, the dad is also involved and a bit of a deadbeat and the two of them are always fighting with each other. Dont forget you also inherit a bitter ex in the deal too, and when the kiddies cry out "I wanna talk to daddy" you just get this warm tingly feeling inside, just feels bad and you would think things should not be so hard cause any way you slice it there will be plenty of drama.  People that can pull it off are out there but very rare.

[calfzilla]

Yes good point and I have considered it could be rewarding in some areas.  Im 46 though and she (44) can not have any more kids so i will never have my own if I stay with her.  Agree if I could add one or two of my own into the mix it might be different.  She has 2 kids both under 7 years old, the dad is also involved and a bit of a deadbeat and the two of them are always fighting with each other. Dont forget you also inherit a bitter ex in the deal too, and when the kiddies cry out "I wanna talk to daddy" you just get this warm tingly feeling inside, just feels bad and you would think things should not be so hard cause any way you slice it there will be plenty of drama.  People that can pull it off are out there but very rare.

Please for your own sake get out!  I'm sure she is a great person, but it's just not worth it.  Like you said, sometimes the above situations work out but are very rare.  Better to get out now and avoid a serious case of the regrets.   

[myt1]

After reading that, I would probably agree that it's not worth it.  If the dad is a deadbeat, you still want kids, and there is drama there's no way it's going to be worth it when those kids hit their teens and are rebelling cuz their real dad sucks.  All the drama will be yours, like the dad got in your car and just took a big shit on your seat and left.

[Les Grossman]

Yes good point and I have considered it could be rewarding in some areas.  Im 46 though and she (44) can not have any more kids so i will never have my own if I stay with her.  Agree if I could add one or two of my own into the mix it might be different.  She has 2 kids both under 7 years old, the dad is also involved and a bit of a deadbeat and the two of them are always fighting with each other. Dont forget you also inherit a bitter ex in the deal too, and when the kiddies cry out "I wanna talk to daddy" you just get this warm tingly feeling inside, just feels bad and you would think things should not be so hard cause any way you slice it there will be plenty of drama.  People that can pull it off are out there but very rare.

Run far....run fast.

Get out now while you can - there will be less hurt and less time wasted in the long run.

This can only end badly.

[bigdumbbell]

What, they can't stand the fact they have a metrosexual fruitloop as a son?

another pot/kettle moment from Getbig's Liberace.