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Author Topic: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?  (Read 3516 times)

Parker

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If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« on: June 05, 2010, 04:26:49 AM »
There would be two for me. The short one would be:

GOD: "Parker, your arms are too short to box with me!"

Me: "I know, but I can still kick your shin..."

GOD: "Always the optimist..."
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Tapeworm

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #1 on: June 05, 2010, 04:29:50 AM »
You presume to know the mind of God?  BLASPHEMER!  STONE HIM!!

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#1 Klaus fan

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #2 on: June 05, 2010, 06:53:02 AM »
Me: Can I get to heaven?
God: Of course you can. And Klaus too.
Me: Thanks, bye.
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #3 on: June 05, 2010, 06:58:40 AM »
me "where r my 40 virgins" ?  >:(
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Parker

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2010, 07:05:34 AM »
Quote from: ToxicAvenger on June 05, 2010, 06:58:40 AM
me "where r my 40 virgins" ?  >:(
God: "Hahaha...you believe that? Good Ol Mohammad, always plaing tricks. You know there is always a gimmick mortals try and play to get you to buy what they are selling...
And let me tell you, Hell is no better, you should see the Sin Packages that they are selling!"
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devilsmile

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #5 on: June 05, 2010, 07:19:29 AM »
(me approaching the gates of heaven); "lame..."

( me at the gates of heaven);"......  ::)"

(god)); "Oh yeah oh yeah *wishky cough*" yes come in..!"

(me approaching the work desk of god); "......"

(god reading my sin list for 10 more minutes)

(me); "..... yeah... listen..."

(god); "No you can com here!"

(me); "Yeah exactly, listen.... I don't want to come here..."

(god); "......"

(me); "yeah, look, all these explanations that you hide from your people why you do some things that don't make any sense... what would happend if I become one of your followers... you will just stab me in the back when you have a bad day?"

(god); "well..... I.... it's..."

(me); "exactly.... that is precisely the reason i don't want to come here"

(god); ".... THERE IS an explanation.... I...... well...... *sigh*.... dude....

(me); "yeah man.... it's time to face it... it makes no sense because nothing is what you say it is"

(god); "well... what would you do if you have infinite capabilities to do anything and anything?"


(me walks away from heaven, change into a ufo and flye deep in space)


(god); "damn...."
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YngiweRhoads

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #6 on: June 05, 2010, 07:21:05 AM »
Coke or Pepsi?
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #7 on: June 05, 2010, 08:24:58 AM »
Quote from: Parker on June 05, 2010, 07:05:34 AM
God: "Hahaha...you believe that? Good Ol Mohammad, always plaing tricks. You know there is always a gimmick mortals try and play to get you to buy what they are selling...
And let me tell you, Hell is no better, you should see the Sin Packages that they are selling!"

i dont quite think thats actually in the koran  :-\  honestly dunno where they came up with that
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CalvinH

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2010, 12:40:48 AM »
''Going Down''
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doison

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #9 on: June 06, 2010, 02:46:32 PM »
Me: "testicles on the OUTSIDE of the body?  Seriously?  That was your design?  How high were you when you expected us to worship you as being infallible when you started out with that major fucking fault?"

God: <absent>
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Lundgren

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #10 on: June 06, 2010, 04:40:22 PM »
To   God:The only way I'll be eternally happy is if you spend the rest of existance as a aids infested hooker in thailand.
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Parker

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #11 on: June 06, 2010, 05:09:45 PM »
Quote from: doison on June 06, 2010, 02:46:32 PM
Me: "testicles on the OUTSIDE of the body?  Seriously?  That was your design?  How high were you when you expected us to worship you as being infallible when you started out with that major fucking fault?"

God: <absent>
And, "Really, you must have some real sick sense of humor when designing women. Putting the shitter next to the snack bar..."
Quote from: Lundgrenisgod on June 06, 2010, 04:40:22 PM
The only way I'll be eternally happy is if you spend the rest of existance as a aids infested hooker in thailand.
???
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G_Thang

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #12 on: June 06, 2010, 05:17:40 PM »
i just tried my best to be "G" when i lived among flawed men.

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Parker

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #13 on: June 06, 2010, 05:20:48 PM »
Quote from: G_Thang on June 06, 2010, 05:17:40 PM
i just tried my best to be "G" when i lived among flawed men.


GOD: "I know, I know, but unfortunately, I'm the only 'G' here...ya feel me?"
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tbombz

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #14 on: June 06, 2010, 05:53:57 PM »
Me:  "please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything! please forgive me! thank you for everything!"


as for his reply.. no clue
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James Blunt

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #15 on: June 06, 2010, 06:01:47 PM »
"Hey, It's nice to see you again! That time I saw you on shrooms freaked me out! I'm glad i'm not so paranoid this time."

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big14

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #16 on: June 06, 2010, 06:24:55 PM »
God:"who are you? I never created you"

ME:" I know, I am here to teach you"

God: "Thank you, I am so confused"
God "I have so many questions, where do I start?"
God:"I am so excited, happy and nervous!"
Me: "sit down and calm down God, you want me to call you something else btw?"
God:"Yes God sound so corny, I always felt like a Lenny, I dont know...
please can you give me a fitting name?"
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James Blunt

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #17 on: June 06, 2010, 07:00:46 PM »
Quote from: big14 on June 06, 2010, 06:24:55 PM
God:"who are you? I never created you"

ME:" I know, I am here to teach you"

God: "Thank you, I am so confused"
God "I have so many questions, where do I start?"
God:"I am so excited, happy and nervous!"
Me: "sit down and calm down God, you want me to call you something else btw?"
God:"Yes God sound so corny, I always felt like a Lenny, I dont know...
please can you give me a fitting name?"

hahahaah  ;D
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noworries

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Re: If you die what would your convo with God be like (if you believe in God)?
« Reply #18 on: June 06, 2010, 08:30:46 PM »
I'd ask him what he was drinking the day he made goodrum and if he any left.
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