Just found out a good friend committed suicide.

[whitewidow]

Wow, that seemed like extremely poor planing on his part, to start using drugs without understanding what happens next.

well he overdosed it wasn't suicide but yes if you have to rely on the blackmarket for drugs there are going to be times you cannot find it and you have to suffer and go through withdrawals. I cannot count the time he had to go through opiate and xanax and other benzo withdrawals. I gave him money to go get help but he blew it on drugs. We got his family to put him in rehab many times but he always stayed 10 days and checked out. He looked very good when he got out of jail and he was pretty much sober till he had a probation violation and had to go back to jail the next morning and he just decided to get high before he went back in and his tolerance was nothing at the time. He just could not handle those big shots he used to take and he died.

Like I said he knew what he was dealing with he struggled with oxycontin and heroin for 4-5 years and this as just a good ole suburban white boy who just went down the wrong path. Once you start using heroin for years you are pretty fucked! nothing helped the guy suboxone would not help him, methadone did not help him, he was just fucked. 90% of people who fuck with heroin do not get off of it forever many relapse or struggle with it. very few actually clean up and stay off the drug. Those who clean up usually are the ones who have to do years in jail or they join the army. If you stay in your environment you are used to you are looking at a relapse.

This seems to be a bad pattern it starts with opiate painkillers like oxycontin or these days roxicodone and they wind up not being able to find it one night or find heroin is cheaper and BOOM just like that they turn into heroin addicts. His death wasn't that surprising but it did hit me hard! Maybe not the day I found out but after some time I started to really mourn. I started thinking what else I could of done but there was really nothing more i could of done! I wasn't his dad! If I were his dada I would of kicked the shit out of him and threw his ass in the army.His dad was to easy-going though. he didn't want to believe there was a serious problem!

I knew there was a serious problem because he almost killed me one night when we were driving,he totally passed out at the wheel going down a hill at a relatively fast speed and went totally of course and almost slammed into a big parked car.I gave him some of my own money to see my dr. and get some help. some of the meds he was getting off the black market like the xanax ,valium or klonopin I really do think he did need them but he needed to get a legit precritption. I also thought he was Bi-polar due to drug use and maybe my dr. could of helped him with that or maybe prescribed some subutex instead of suboxone. sometimes the naloxone in suboxone does not settle right with some people.Anyway I could say his dad should of done this or that but that does not bring him back and it as a awful loss! He was more then a frined he was like my brother. I am 31 and we were friends since we were 13 and we just clicked like a magnet to a fridge we were def family. All his family is like my family. It was def a huge blow and this happened 5 days before christmas and i am still not 100% over it. It rocked me pretty hard.

[Rami]

Close call how his drug abuse nearly killed you as well. That's crazy. Seemed like he wasn't even close to be able to change.

well he overdosed it wasn't suicide but yes if you have to rely on the blackmarket for drugs there are going to be times you cannot find it and you have to suffer and go through withdrawals. I cannot count the time he had to go through opiate and xanax and other benzo withdrawals. I gave him money to go get help but he blew it on drugs. We got his family to put him in rehab many times but he always stayed 10 days and checked out. He looked very good when he got out of jail and he was pretty much sober till he had a probation violation and had to go back to jail the next morning and he just decided to get high before he went back in and his tolerance was nothing at the time. He just could not handle those big shots he used to take and he died.

Like I said he knew what he was dealing with he struggled with oxycontin and heroin for 4-5 years and this as just a good ole suburban white boy who just went down the wrong path. Once you start using heroin for years you are pretty fucked! nothing helped the guy suboxone would not help him, methadone did not help him, he was just fucked. 90% of people who fuck with heroin do not get off of it forever many relapse or struggle with it. very few actually clean up and stay off the drug. Those who clean up usually are the ones who have to do years in jail or they join the army. If you stay in your environment you are used to you are looking at a relapse.

This seems to be a bad pattern it starts with opiate painkillers like oxycontin or these days roxicodone and they wind up not being able to find it one night or find heroin is cheaper and BOOM just like that they turn into heroin addicts. His death wasn't that surprising but it did hit me hard! Maybe not the day I found out but after some time I started to really mourn. I started thinking what else I could of done but there was really nothing more i could of done! I wasn't his dad! If I were his dada I would of kicked the shit out of him and threw his ass in the army.His dad was to easy-going though. he didn't want to believe there was a serious problem!

I knew there was a serious problem because he almost killed me one night when we were driving,he totally passed out at the wheel going down a hill at a relatively fast speed and went totally of course and almost slammed into a big parked car.I gave him some of my own money to see my dr. and get some help. some of the meds he was getting off the black market like the xanax ,valium or klonopin I really do think he did need them but he needed to get a legit precritption. I also thought he was Bi-polar due to drug use and maybe my dr. could of helped him with that or maybe prescribed some subutex instead of suboxone. sometimes the naloxone in suboxone does not settle right with some people.Anyway I could say his dad should of done this or that but that does not bring him back and it as a awful loss! He was more then a frined he was like my brother. I am 31 and we were friends since we were 13 and we just clicked like a magnet to a fridge we were def family. All his family is like my family. It was def a huge blow and this happened 5 days before christmas and i am still not 100% over it. It rocked me pretty hard.

[whitewidow]

Close call how his drug abuse nearly killed you as well. That's crazy. Seemed like he wasn't even close to be able to change.

Yes! I had to yell and I had to correct the steering wheel! otherwise he would of hit a big truck! I couldn't belive he just passed out like that while driving! One second he was up and talking the next he was comatose! It would of been a horrible wreck as we were going downhill and he was drifting to the left side of the street were there was a big huge parked truck. I was fired up and could of protected myself better if he would have hit the truck but I was lucky to have grabbed the wheel and yell at him real loud and correct the wheel so we were going straight. It did piss me off. But it was something I could bitch to him about and it was proof he needed help! NO he wasn't going to change because he did not want to change his environment,plus he was states property! once you get on probation the state owns your ass!

[Childish///AMG]

Wow, thats sad. A military friend left the service, because they were dealing with a lot of issues. I pray each day that they do not take their own life. Because they said that they know they are going to do it. It just brings back memories of people who you never thought would take their life, but did. Stay strong

[FitnessFrenzy]

I gotta say I'm impressed with all the positivity. Thanks for your input. He went down by a lake in Dallas county in Texas and blew his head off. I never sensed anything was wrong but you never know a mans deepest thought.

Again, thanks for all the love!

We need to get all the negativity away from Getbig. Waste of time.

[oldtimer1]

Except for the few examples of generation nothing posts I'm really surprised by the good will expressed here. Maybe there is hope.

[King Shizzo]

This should show the power of clinical depression. I'm sure plenty of suicide victims were believers in god. However, they're earthly pain was so great, that they were willing to take the chance of eternal hell.

It is obviously very real.

[MikMaq]

A true suicide is a paced, disciplined certainty. People pontificate, "suicide is selfish," while career churchman like Pater call it a coward's act typically because they lack the necessary suffering to sympathize. Couldn't be further from the truth; suicide takes tremendous courage.

-Best movie quote ever.


Anyways it'll be exactly six months on tuesday since my friend did that shit, had a nice little reminder at work yesterday as a squad of cop cars spent the day looking for a body near my work(timing eh?)


That shit is fucked, it's like discovering a friend of yours is a murderer, dead, and spreading a contagious disease(depression) all at the same time. It's a total head trip, it's not fun realizing virtually everyone you know is capable of murder, worst yet taking pretty much anyone away from you.

[King Shizzo]

A true suicide is a paced, disciplined certainty. People pontificate, "suicide is selfish," while career churchman like Pater call it a coward's act typically because they lack the necessary suffering to sympathize. Couldn't be further from the truth; suicide takes tremendous courage.

-Best movie quote ever.


Anyways it'll be exactly six months on tuesday since my friend did that shit, had a nice little reminder at work yesterday as a squad of cop cars spent the day looking for a body near my work(timing eh?)


That shit is fucked, it's like discovering a friend of yours is a murderer, dead, and spreading a contagious disease(depression) all at the same time.

The King calls you for execution. You have too many shit threads/posts.

[Papper]

We need to get all the negativity away from Getbig. Waste of time.

yes. getbig needs to embrace things like love, kindness and positivity. maybe start a fundraising for underpriviliged youth? 

[El Diablo Blanco]

I gotta say I'm impressed with all the positivity. Thanks for your input. He went down by a lake in Dallas county in Texas and blew his head off. I never sensed anything was wrong but you never know a mans deepest thought.

Again, thanks for all the love!

For some people this world just sucks.  Lots of ugliness in human nature and some people just don't want to live to see it.  Some people are blessed with riches and can never find happiness, others are born in shit and poverty and have a smile on their faces daily.  Hard to tell what makes people happy or not.  Some depressed people feel the need to kill others, some themselves.  This world is just nuts.  It continues to move at breakneck speed with no signs of slowing down.  Human compassion is at it's lowest and getting worst. I don't even want to know what this world will be like in 50-100 years.

[bebop396]

Happiness in people depend on Seratonin levels, so happiness really does come from within...

[Natural Man]

there are three kind of adults, those who realize life is about killing or getting killed, those who cant deal with it, and those who never grow up to avoid facing it. Humans are animals who are conscious of being animals. It s called maturing, reaching adulthood.