Your choice to believe or not is your own. Your rejection of Him...regardless of "why" ... will result in your eternal damnation in the lake of fire.
so you don't think your god will care either way that some people like yourself create such a negative image of christians that it turns people away from him?
I mean, you said your god didn't tell you to be nice about it so I guess that means your god is an asshole too (we'll ignore the fact that he's already condemned to eternal torture the vast majority of all the life he has ever created on this planet)