Harley, if you go to a grappling tournament and there are no competitors in your weight/age class or let's say just one other competitor, do you feel any sense of pride in "winning" or "taking second place" or any obligation to insert an asterisk next to such victories or runner up placings? I ask because I once entered a natural powerlifting competition and was the only competitor in my weight/age group and was awarded the title of national natural champion. However, I feel like a bit of a fraud publicly claiming to be the U.S. Natural Powerlifting champion knowing that no one else showed up to beat my 670lb total.
Dear SquidVicious,
Terrific question!!
Success in life can be correlated to how many times you actually "show up." Of course, no one wins EVERY time he shows up (here I go again- except Rickson Gracie) but that depends
on how you define "winning."
I notice that most of the guys who mock winning by forfeit or not having an opponent, do NOT themselves train, diet, sweat, fight, deal with the nervous tension a week before the fight, etc.
Competitors don't have control over who shows up. Does anyone really think I woke up sick as a dog and drove 2 hours by myself to find out I wasn't going to fight? Did I come on GetBig
boasting about "winning" the Gold Medal? Of course not.
However, I took one step closer to learning how to manage my anxiety when competing. The better I can control that, the better I can control other areas of my life.
If you are not extrapolating your victories from one area into other areas of your life, your victories are hollow. I go off and daydream when judges start yelling at me.
Why? Because I've shown up and fought guys from all over the world. And sometimes I showed up when no one else did. Maybe I wanted it more. Maybe it was just coincidence.
One thing is for sure, it is so damn easy to make excused NOT to go, NOT to do my hour of cardio in the morning, not to train BJJ in a gi late at night when I'm tired and fight my
terrible claustrophobia. What is NOT easy is to show up. I don't measure people by their "failures" but rather by their honest "attempts." I am an over-achiever and that comes
only from my willingness to dream big and show up. I lose all the time but by merely showing up, I walk away proud of myself. Forget the Haters.
Harley