Author Topic: What would you do?  (Read 2486 times)

Wiggs

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What would you do?
« on: September 14, 2024, 08:31:52 AM »
What would you do if you walked out of your front door one morning and find yourself in the presence of a full grown adult African Lion? He's pacing back forth slowly looking as confused as you are. He's not pissed but he has the potential to be. You are not armed it's you, your keys, and wallet.

You're 10 feet outside of your door and you already locked it.  You're concerned any sudden movement will change the lions mood. You 're facing each other but he's about 20 feet away. FYI, that fucker will have no problems reaching you in 3 bounds if needed. What do you do?

The only thing I can say for certain is manage your emotions. 

7

The Scott

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2024, 08:43:35 AM »
What would you do if you walked out of your front door one morning and find yourself in the presence of a full grown adult African Lion. He's pacing back forth looking as confused as you are.  He's not pissed but he has the potential to be. You are not armed it's you, your keys, and wallet.

You're 10 feet outside of your door and you already locked it.  You're concerned any sudden movement will change the lions mood. You 're facing each other but he's about 20 feet away. FYI, that fucker will have no problems reaching you in 3 bounds if needed. What do you do?

The only thing I can say for certain is manage your emotions.

I have a friend (she is in her late 70s now) who early (2 a.m. or so) one morning walked out of her home to be greeted by a large coyote.  She froze while looking at the animal and then all of a sudden it looked to one side and then leapt away and hauled buttocks down the street.  She looked not far down the street and saw a very LARGE Mountain Lion, staring at her.  That animal could easily make a few leaps and be on her. 

She maintained eye contact and literally backed up her driveway and then backwards up the stairs and into her home and called  the Sheriff and Animal Control.  They both confirmed she had correctly done all she could do and was fortunate to be alive.

I am a gimp that has been (as we used to say in the early '70s!) "Spocked out" by plenty of coyotes as they know I am lame and easy prey.   I do not carry but I have done all that I can to look larger than I am and I am using metal crutches and show them to the animals.  If attacked I am likely toast.  Just not "French" toast as I am not dying without a fight. 

As a young child I defended myself against a German Shepard as it shook me like a toy in its teeth until I grabbled hold of its testicles and using all my retard strength crushed them until it screamed in agony letting me go.

But yeah.  I would likely lose to an African Lion.  Hopefully I would at least have an instant massive heart attack and he gets a cold dinner.  That was my youngest brother's best defense against a vampire attack.  Makes sense to me!   ;D

mops

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2024, 08:46:13 AM »

oldtimer1

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2024, 08:48:09 AM »
You're lion. That could never happen.

joswift

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2024, 08:49:28 AM »
I would be more concerned about the lions feelings if confronted by a black man

wes

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2024, 08:50:56 AM »
I`d simply play dead






......until it killed me.

IroNat

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2024, 08:51:47 AM »
I would remain still but if the lion attacked would use bjj on it.

wes

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2024, 09:01:32 AM »
I would remain still but if the lion attacked would use bjj on it.
Why go to the extreme.....just ragdoll it as if you were Hanky vs. Mike Tyson?

Hulkotron

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #8 on: September 14, 2024, 09:06:21 AM »
I would hit a Most Muscular.

SF1900

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #9 on: September 14, 2024, 09:57:37 AM »
I would stay completely frozen.

But my main man bhanks would take down a full grown male lion in about 6 seconds.
X

SOMEPARTS

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #10 on: September 14, 2024, 10:03:55 AM »
I would hit a Most Muscular.


Beat me to it!

Krankenstein

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #11 on: September 14, 2024, 11:00:03 AM »

Grape Ape

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #12 on: September 14, 2024, 11:30:41 AM »
Well, now I would see the lion and say "Fuck, Wiggs tried to warn me about this"
Y

Dokey111

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #13 on: September 14, 2024, 01:39:44 PM »
First of course you evacuate your bowels.

Then you're on your own.

HTH

Tennisballz

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #14 on: September 14, 2024, 03:51:19 PM »
What would you do if you walked out of your front door one morning and find yourself in the presence of a full grown adult African Lion? He's pacing back forth slowly looking as confused as you are. He's not pissed but he has the potential to be. You are not armed it's you, your keys, and wallet.

You're 10 feet outside of your door and you already locked it.  You're concerned any sudden movement will change the lions mood. You 're facing each other but he's about 20 feet away. FYI, that fucker will have no problems reaching you in 3 bounds if needed. What do you do?

The only thing I can say for certain is manage your emotions.
I'd make sure my wallet was secure....that's for sure.  ;D

CalvinH

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #15 on: September 14, 2024, 06:27:48 PM »
Log onto GB from my phone and ask for advice.


...And wish I lived in Springfield.

Irongrip400

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #16 on: September 14, 2024, 06:48:30 PM »
Back up slowly to my door and unlock it whilst looking the lion in the eye. Once in my house I’d lock the door and call animal control. If it wasn’t aggressive I wouldn’t shoot it or want it put down. I’d be frightened no doubt.

chaos

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #17 on: September 14, 2024, 07:10:12 PM »
What would you do if you walked out of your front door one morning and find yourself in the presence of a full grown adult African Lion? He's pacing back forth slowly looking as confused as you are. He's not pissed but he has the potential to be. You are not armed it's you, your keys, and wallet.

You're 10 feet outside of your door and you already locked it.  You're concerned any sudden movement will change the lions mood. You 're facing each other but he's about 20 feet away. FYI, that fucker will have no problems reaching you in 3 bounds if needed. What do you do?

The only thing I can say for certain is manage your emotions.
Do the pss pss pss thing and call him over.
Liar!!!!Filt!!!!

kreator

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #18 on: September 14, 2024, 09:55:00 PM »
The lion of Lebanon? Well in this case I just hope I'm already wearing my grass stained sneakers

Brenda Steunbeer

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #19 on: September 14, 2024, 10:45:37 PM »
People are 10,000 times more dangerous than any large animal.

As animals are concerned the danger is in the small ones: disease spreading mosquitoes and ticks for example.

Beefjake

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #20 on: September 14, 2024, 10:54:11 PM »
Back up slowly to my door and unlock it whilst looking the lion in the eye. Once in my house I’d lock the door and call animal control. If it wasn’t aggressive I wouldn’t shoot it or want it put down. I’d be frightened no doubt.
This.
Not sure about the eye contact though. Do they take it as a challenge/threat?

Humble Narcissist

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #21 on: September 15, 2024, 12:35:51 AM »
Just walk away. The lion won't attack unless threatened. Ever watch the Jackass movie where the midget grabbed the lion's tail?

Taffin

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #22 on: September 15, 2024, 03:35:00 AM »
Hope it'd just finished eating..?
T

bhank

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #23 on: September 15, 2024, 03:37:45 AM »
Just walk away. The lion won't attack unless threatened. Ever watch the Jackass movie where the midget grabbed the lion's tail?

This

BB

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Re: What would you do?
« Reply #24 on: September 15, 2024, 03:58:47 AM »
This

Hankins, off topic question. Survival scenario, if you had to eat Rocky or Duke, which are you picking?

As for the original question, the just walk away answer seems the best. It tends to work with most animals, especially if they're well fed, and not in packs*. When you dilly-dally around things, that seems to cause problems. Slowly leave the immediate area, then really leave or get help.

* The Tsavo Maneaters - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tsavo_Man-Eaters .