Author Topic: republican jokes. A thread to laugh about the conservative flotsam (Read 5281 times)

Fury · « **Reply #25 on:** March 16, 2010, 02:18:00 PM »

Quote from: Hugo Chavez on March 16, 2010, 08:46:59 AM

so that means I deleted your post easy way to find out, ask the other mods and if everyone denies it, ask Ron. I didn't delete your post. I took the heat for it when I did in the past, it's kind of fucked up to take the heat for the ones I didn't.

Some things never change.

kcballer · « **Reply #26 on:** March 16, 2010, 02:24:14 PM »

Quote from: 333386 on March 16, 2010, 10:59:46 AM

KC - just put on the news. That is the same for Dems. Obama's daily existence is Dems getting owned.

Oh really? Seems to me he fu*ked those repubs up pretty good in the election. Bent 'em right over and made them say 'yes massa' hahaha

Hugo Chavez · « **Reply #27 on:** March 16, 2010, 02:57:36 PM »

I didn't delete 333's post. It was either ozmo, BB or ron. I've never denied when I delete people's posts. If that's all 3333 said, I have no idea why it got deleted so ask the other mods, I can't answer because I didn't delete it.

Tito24 · « **Reply #28 on:** March 16, 2010, 09:19:03 PM »

Mods please pin this thread for a few more days...

I have like 100 more good jokes about the flotsam to post..

thanks...

BTW 333367 i erased your post...

Soul Crusher · « **Reply #29 on:** March 17, 2010, 05:01:47 AM »

Quote from: MarkosChamakh on March 16, 2010, 09:19:03 PM

Mods please pin this thread for a few more days...

I have like 100 more good jokes about the flotsam to post..

thanks...

BTW 333367 i erased your post...

Talk about flotsam:

The Showstoppa · « **Reply #30 on:** March 17, 2010, 05:41:51 AM »

24KT · « **Reply #31 on:** March 17, 2010, 06:17:19 AM »

I love them. Pure genius! great thread! I give it 2 thumbs up!

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #32 on:** March 17, 2010, 06:58:04 AM »

LOL @ 3333 being bitter and bickering no matter what.

Soul Crusher · « **Reply #33 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:03:22 AM »

Fine, i will start my own liberal trash thread and watch it get tons of more replies and comments.

BTW - the demo flotsam demographic is far far greater than the conservative one by a factor of probably 500%

24KT · « **Reply #34 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:30:21 AM »

Quote from: 333386 on March 17, 2010, 07:03:22 AM

Fine, i will start my own liberal trash thread and watch it get tons of more replies and comments.

BTW - the demo flotsam demographic is far far greater than the conservative one by a factor of probably 500%

I was actually gonna suggest you start your own democratic joke thread, and to stop whining & pouting like a thwarted 2 yr old. You gotta admit, some of those jokes were hilarious. I'm sure if you try real hard you'll find some equally funny jokes about Democrats. So stop sulking and start laughing. It's good for your health.

Soul Crusher · « **Reply #35 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:31:30 AM »

Quote from: jaguarenterprises on March 17, 2010, 07:30:21 AM

I was actually gonna suggest you start your own democratic joke thread, and to stop whining & pouting like a thwarted 2 yr old. You gotta admit, some of those jokes were hilarious. I'm sure if you try real hard you'll find some equally funny jokes about Democrats. So stop sulking and start laughing. It's good for your health.

Some are funny. I already said that.

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #36 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:38:15 AM »

Quote from: 333386 on March 17, 2010, 07:03:22 AM

Fine, i will start my own liberal trash thread and watch it get tons of more replies and comments.

BTW - the demo flotsam demographic is far far greater than the conservative one by a factor of probably 500%

Please do.

Then you can try to keep your own thread on topic instead of typically polluting up the other threads on here.

*insert random vid*

*insert random pie chart*

*say "cap and trade"*

There. I think I got you covered for at least three pages on this one here.

Soul Crusher · « **Reply #37 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:39:46 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on March 17, 2010, 07:38:15 AM

Please do.

Then you can try to keep your own thread on topic instead of typically polluting up the other threads on here.

*insert random vid*

*insert random pie chart*

*say "cap and trade"*

There. I think I got you covered for at least three pages on this one here.

God forbid anyone confuse you with facts, charts, and vids of thing right?

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #38 on:** March 17, 2010, 07:47:13 AM »

Quote from: 333386 on March 17, 2010, 07:39:46 AM

God forbid anyone confuse you with facts, charts, and vids of thing right?

Certainly not if they pertain to the thread topic at hand.

Some days your ADHD just gets the better of you. I understand.

Tito24 · « **Reply #39 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:00:04 AM »

HOW TO BE A GOOD REPUBLICAN

1. You have to believe that the nation's current 8-year prosperity was due to the work of Ronald Reagan and George Bush, but yesterday's gasoline prices are all Clinton's fault.

2. You have to believe that those privileged from birth achieve success all on their own.

3. You have to be against all government programs, but expect Social Security checks on time.

4. You have to believe that AIDS victims deserve their disease, but smokers with lung cancer and overweight individuals with heart disease don't deserve theirs.

5. You have to appreciate the power rush that comes with sporting a gun.

6. You have to believe everything Rush Limbaugh says.

7. You have to believe that the agricultural, restaurant, housing and hotel industries can survive without immigrant labor.

8. You have to believe God hates homosexuality, but loves the death penalty.

9. You have to believe society is color-blind and growing up black in America doesn't diminish your opportunities, but you still won't vote for Alan Keyes.

10. You have to believe that pollution is OK as long as it makes a profit.

11. You have to believe in prayer in schools, as long as you don't pray to Allah or Buddha.

12. You have to believe Newt Gingrich and Henry Hyde were really faithful husbands.

13. You have to believe speaking a few Spanish phrases makes you instantly popular in the barrio.

14. You have to believe that only your own teenagers are still virgins.

15. You have to be against government interference in business, until your oil company, corporation or Savings and Loan is about to go broke and you beg for a government bail out.

16. You love Jesus and Jesus loves you and, by the way, Jesus shares your hatred for AIDS victims, homosexuals, and President Clinton.

17. You have to believe government has nothing to do with providing police protection, national defense, and building roads.

18. You have to believe a poor, minority student with a disciplinary history and failing grades will be admitted into an elite private school with a $1,000 voucher.

Tito24 · « **Reply #40 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:09:02 AM »

what's the difference between the Vietnam War and the Iraq War? A. George W. Bush had a plan to get out of the Vietnam War.

OzmO · « **Reply #41 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:16:30 AM »

Quote from: MarkosChamakh on March 17, 2010, 09:09:02 AM

what's the difference between the Vietnam War and the Iraq War? A. George W. Bush had a plan to get out of the Vietnam War.

Tito24 · « **Reply #42 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:30:48 AM »

"But if you think about it, Sarah Palin and Oprah Winfrey have a lot in common. They both helped get Obama elected." –David Letterman

"It's a great day for Sarah Palin. She was hired as a commentator for Fox News. She signed a multi-year contract, which means she'll probably quit after a year." -Craig Ferguson

"Some critics are saying that Palin won't last on Fox because she's an over-emotional woman who gets the facts wrong. But I disagree. It's working great for Glenn Beck, so she'll be fine." -Craig Ferguson

"Sarah Palin's book is number one on Amazon.com right now. Stephen King actually has the number two book. Very scary new book called 'Sarah Palin Becomes President.'" -Jimmy Kimmel (Read more Sarah Palin book jokes)

Tito24 · « **Reply #43 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:38:27 AM »

"Rush Limbaugh says if the health care bill passes, he will leave the country. The Democrats are upset, because if they knew that, they would have passed the bill years ago." -Craig Ferguson

"Sarah Palin's book is big, 400 pages. She wrote the book herself and agonized over every word, and so will you." --David Letterman

"People in Alaska are looking forward to Sarah Palin's memoir. They're already calling it 'The Book to Nowhere.'" --David Letterman

"According to a new poll, 42% of Americans say they would vote for Sarah Palin for president in 2012. They also said they'd support her decision to step down in 2013." --Conan O'Brien

"In a recent study, the United States was ranked the 114th happiest country in the world. Then Sarah Palin stepped down. Now we're at 17." --Conan O'Brien

"President Obama right now is in Russia. Obama went there because from Russia you can actually see Sarah Palin cleaning out her office in Alaska." --Conan O'Brien

Tito24 · « **Reply #44 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:47:45 AM »

Quote from: OzmO on March 17, 2010, 09:16:30 AM

"According to the New York Post, Tiger Woods has hired former President Bush's press secretary Ari Fleischer to help with his public relations campaign. Is George Bush's guy really the one you want in charge of your approval rating? If it was up to me, I'd hire Clinton's guy." -Jimmy Kimmel

"Actually, you can see why he hired him. Tiger Woods and Bush have similar problems. Neither one knew when to pull out." -Jay Leno

kcballer · « **Reply #45 on:** March 17, 2010, 10:16:16 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on March 17, 2010, 07:38:15 AM

Please do.

Then you can try to keep your own thread on topic instead of typically polluting up the other threads on here.

*insert random vid*

*insert random pie chart*

*say "cap and trade"*

There. I think I got you covered for at least three pages on this one here.

Don't forget Nazi war criminals or Stalin references as if Obama is the same.

chadstallion · « **Reply #46 on:** March 17, 2010, 10:23:09 AM »

subscribe for jokes
subscribe to see 333386 responses

Coach is Back! · « **Reply #47 on:** March 17, 2010, 10:25:41 AM »

Well, got give it you libs, since you can't debate or win on policy threads like this are your only alternative..LOL!

Soul Crusher · « **Reply #48 on:** March 17, 2010, 12:44:33 PM »

Quote from: kcballer on March 17, 2010, 10:16:16 AM

Don't forget Nazi war criminals or Stalin references as if Obama is the same.

I am 100% correct in those references KC.

kcballer · « **Reply #49 on:** March 17, 2010, 01:34:41 PM »

Quote from: 333386 on March 17, 2010, 12:44:33 PM

I am 100% correct in those references KC.

btw where is your democrat joke thread 333?