So I’ve struggled with drinking the past 5 years. I consider myself in the “grey area alcoholic”. My wife scoffs at me when I say I’m an alcoholic. She can drink for a week then not touch it for months. So I don’t thing she understands where I’m coming from. I dont have to drink everyday to function or don’t have to drink till I pass out. I just feel the overwhelming need to drink everyday. Usually 3-6 beers but it prevents me from succeeding in other areas of my life and im just done with it. I successfully went dry for 7 months last year. Then I went on vacation with friends I’ve known for 30 years and thought I could drink for a week and be okay. Since then (October) I’ve been back on the sauce and unable to quit. Any suggestions on how to quit? Willpower just doesn’t cut it. My previous dry period was due to being completely done by making bad choices and Turing to the Bible and trying to live a righteous life. So far that has not worked this go around. It’s tough to admit it but I know I’m weak.
I think this is a good time to bring up an issue that I have, which has also been on my mind.
It's hard to quit something if you don't want to quit, or have no reason to quit.
It sounds like you are at the point of wanting to quit [hopefully NOT due to health reasons yet, but concern they may become an issue later in life].
So that's good that you want to quit.
One thing I hasn't brought up on Getbig [aside from PM] that I alluded to above, was that I had been smoking cigarettes during the pandemic.
In the past 57 days, I've smoked 19 cigarettes.
Most recently, I've dropped to smoking 2-3 on Sunday, but I skipped yesterday. So now I'm going to 2-3 every two weeks, the 2-3 a month, then see how I feel from there.
As to why I've been smoking - that was because fucking gyms were closed for 500+ fucking days straight. I was just filling time.
Now that I can work out without the police FOLLOWING ME TO THE GYM [I had no vaccine passport, so that happened 1-2 times per week], I've not wanted to smoke.
I still enjoy cigarettes though - but they cannot be moderated, IMO. So I'm thinking once a month would be ok. And that's when I realized - why even bother? I mean, if I smoke two cigarettes on the last day of the month, why not just smoke zero?
I'll go on record - I enjoy smoking cigarettes. I wish they were easier to moderate.
RJ DRIVER: our issues may be the same here, or similar - my issues with cigarettes is that I can't moderate them. And that's why I only smoke weekly.
I can almost guarantee you that if I allowed myself to smoke daily, I would smoke 5-25 cigarettes a day. In fact, IMO, if it was not for health issues, I would probably be a pack a day smoker.
Funny, given the first cigarette I smoked was age 34 [in 2016], and didn't start regularly smoking until age 36.
I smoke 2-3, one day per week. Or I might have one cigarette one day, then 1-2 another day of the week.
I'm currently at maybe 10/month, down from 30/month [one a day] during the pandemic.
There aren't even studies on my level of smoking, since apparently I'm the only person who smokes this little. Almost everyone smokes at least 2-3-4 daily, and there are no studies I'm aware of on 2-3 cigarettes a week.
My concern is that I might increase my smoking, and THAT can become a problem [whereas 2-3 a week is probably not a problem].
Here's one thing I'm thinking though:
There may be no way for me to moderate smoking.
There may be no way for ANYONE to moderate smoking.
Does ANYONE know ANYONE who only smokes cigarettes once a week?
I literally don't know of ANYONE but me.
So what I'm thinking is that smoking may be an "all or NOTHING" thing for me.
I moderate them extremely well, but they are very "more-ish". I find one leads to craving for another and another. They are inherently unsatisfying in this respect.
If I eat a cheat meal, I'm good for a month. But when I smoke even as much as ONE A DAY [which I was smoking during the pandemic], I always wanted another.
Thinking about your post has made me think about how hard it can be to quit. It seems like the best solution is to not go down that road to begin with...
Now on to YOUR post, RJ:
What are the reasons why you are drinking? I can tell you that the ONLY reason why I was smoking is because I went into the pandemic with a TINY smoking habit, and it ONLY stuck around because of the bullshit pandemic measures.
We only JUST got rid of all bullshit measures/mandates in Canada last month [except air travel], so it's only been a month of me being able to live my life again.
And SURPRISE SURPRISE, I only smokes like eight cigarettes since April 1st.
The reason why I couldn't quit is because I was facing issues causing me to smoke. And those issues were NOT in my control.
So my question for you to ask yourself is: why do you drink? Could you find a way to face those issues without drinking?
Can you find a replacement?
I have ONLY had legal access to public saunas since April 1st!! That's when my gym gave up their bullshit policy of counting people who were going there. You had to sign in online, before going.
So if there is some reason you drink, it might be harder to quit, until you find a way to face that reason, and find a replacement for alcohol.
Clearly, there is some reason why it benefits you.
Is it safe to say you aren't just drinking the quantity of alcohol you do just to stave off withdrawals, but that you enjoy that amount?
Are you ready to give up that enjoyment, and just drink the minimum you need to not experience withdrawal [assuming you will have any withdrawal]?
I guess what I'm saying is: if there is a reason you are drinking, and you have no mechanism to deal with that issue, and to replace alcohol with something else, it may be hard.
IMO, wanting to quit is the first step. Replacing alcohol with something else would be good, if you can find such a replacement.
1-2, up to even three drinks daily [depending on your body weight / muscle mass] is probably not THAT bad. Another good first step would be to try to get into that range of drinking.
It seems unlikely to me that a person drinking 1-2...even 3 drinks daily is doing THAT much damage.
Cheers star George Wendt used to only drink starting at 8pm.
Is there any way to do that to start? I can tell you that by only allowing myself to smoke on Sundays, my smoking remains at almost nonexistent levels. But if I allowed myself 2-3 a day, that number could easily rise to a problematic level.
I've also found it daunting to think I will never smoke again. And that's why I allow myself to smoke on Sunday.
Sorry for the long post - you've made me think maybe it's time to just stop smoking outright. Why am I keeping a 10 cigarette/month habit?
Maybe it's just time to let it go.
I could probably smoke 7 cigarettes a day, and not face healthy issues. But I'm a big time hypochondriac, so take anything I say with a grain of salt. I'm a bigtime health pussy. I could probably get away with WAY more than I do - but I hate taking health risks.
