I agree with most of what you said although I was talking about it from a bodybuilding point of view of keeping the most muscle like the OP stated. I couldn't imagine the average Joe would aggressively cut calories if they knew in the long run they had a better chance of gaining it back. I guess that's just not my style since I'm in it for the long haul, but I guess people nowadays are impatient and want results now instead of later. It reminds me of the average overweight american trying to trim down so he can squeeze into his 40" waist husky fit Dockers before his Christmas party for work but once it's over, he won't give a fuck and most likely gain it back plus more with a now slower metabolism.
Generally crash dieting sucks if you are already fairly lean because usually people just gain back the weight very quickly (even if it works in the short-term). It's a quick fix. For example if you use an approach such as Lyle Mcdonalds RFL you can run it for maybe 10-14 days if you are leady lean. The fatter you are the longer can you run it without getting into trouble. Done correctly you will lose minimal amount of muscle. But what happens to most people is that they very quickly rebound. But if it's used to kickstart a diet for an obese person, it can work really well.
If you are doing a competition prep then most people will spend like 12-16-20 weeks on the prep and take their time to lose fat. That's the best approach for most people. But you also have guys like Disgusted who cut calories pretty aggressively from the start and from what I understand he has had plenty of success using that approach. Obvsiouly how fat you are at the start of the diet is a factor.
Some competitive bodybuilders also don't care about staying lean when they aren't competing, this may also have an effect on how you diet during the contest prep. That can be compared to for example a recreational bodybuilder who wants to stay lean year around.
Etc etc.
At the end of the day, if you want to diet down and stay lean then you have to make long-term changes to your diet. This is where most people fail, dieting down is fairly basic, just find something you can stick to (with sufficient protein, proper training etc). But what happens after you finish the diet? That is the hard part.