This Thread Is Closed. New One Coming Soon!

[Qwert II]

"Dates" bjs at the truck stop.

BJ's is about the only way Melvin Goodrum can afford to get his daily intake of protein, since he's generally too broke to be able to afford quality meat, animal or human.

[FitnessFrenzy]

It is late in the evening, and Melvin Goodrum sits restlessly in front of his computer screen. He is just putting some finishing touches on Vince Basile's NAMBLA website. "That old asshole, he thinks to himself.". "I will get him this time". The day has been filled with many tasks, including stocking shelves at the local Walmart. The cans of sardines were particularly tricky today, since some of the cans were leaking. It was, however, not all bad since the smell of the rotten fish reminded Melvin of an unwashed trucker who once fisted him at a Sylva truck stop. "He really knew how to stimulate my g-spot, Melvin thinks to himself".

It is not long before Melvin realizes that he would like to go out into the night and have a little adventure. He pushes the plate with leftover chicken breast to the side and gets up from his worn computer chair. As he changes from his Garfield slippers into some dress shoes with "Venom Vince Versace" sewn on them, he ponderes where he left the key to his 1998 Jaguar. It has some rust and the exhaust is broken, but he loves it nonetheless.

When he finds the keys, Melvin goes outside and squats down into the low Jaguar. As the engine starts and gives out a roar, he nods his head. An old 2Pac CD starts to blast on the stereo, and Melvin rolls down the window, as he drives away from his trailer home. This reminds him of the driving scenes from the Jim Jarmusch film "Ghost Dog: The way of the Samurai".

He drives around the town of Sylva until he stops outside a small home. A person inside the house is bent over and sewing something, which looks like a witch's hat. What looks to be incense fills up the room with a thick smoke. He can also hear the band Slayer playing quite loudly. The person inside the house is Melvin's ex-boyfriend, a local hairdresser. Ever since they broke up a while back, Melvin's heart has been filled with anger and sadness.

Melvin watches the man for a while before he removes his hand from the wheel of the Jaguar, and puts it on his jeans. Then, he slowly unbottons his jeans and licks his index and middle finger. Melvin now puts the two sticky fingers inside his pants, and when they reach his anus, he pushes them inside, as his sphincter opens slowly.

As he moves his fingers back and forth, stimulating his anus, he watches the man inside the house. Despite the lovely anal sensation he feels, Melvin also starts to cry, being reminded about the sadness of the break up.

Suddenly, Melvin feels unwell in his stomach. It must be from the expired can of red bull that he was drinking earlier. He got them cheap since they were expired. Not long after this, Melvin feels a huge fart building up. His two fingers are still inside his ass. As the fart blows out of his ass, soon thereafter, his sphincter opens more fully, thus leaving his two fingers in a vacuum of air inside his anus. As his two fingers are just floating in this air, Melvin thinks: "This must be how tbombz feels most of the time, since his anus has been pounded by many, many men".

As the harsh smell of the fart fills the Jaguar, he decides that he should quit stalking his ex. Instead, he puts the car in drive and presses the accelerator. "Lets see what the motherfuckers have been up to on Getbig, he thinks to himself."

The Jaguar rolls slowly but steadily into the night and the stars shine on it, as it caresses the asphalt of Sylva.

[Qwert II]

I'm tearing up reading this again. So much emotion. So much girth. So much truth. 

[FitnessFrenzy]

I'm tearing up reading this again. So much emotion. So much girth. So much truth. 

beautiful relationship right there (no homo)

[Kwon_2]

LOL! Such an epic story.

Should be a part of the curriculum in every teenagers english-class in every country around the world.

If you want good grades, better memorize this story.

Maybe even re-enact the story during drama-class.

I'm sure many a young teen would want the role as the Vissenesque Witch-hat mender.

Maybe even add a character wearing a bunnysuit during spring.

[FitnessFrenzy]

LOL! Such an epic story.

Should be a part of the curriculum in every teenagers english-class in every country around the world.

If you want good grades, better memorize this story.

Maybe even re-enact the story during drama-class.

I'm sure many a young teen would want the role as the Vissenesque Witch-hat mender.

Maybe even add a character wearing a bunnysuit during spring.

thanks, buddy. I told it to my girlfriend and she has to recite it by heart, without notes, whenever I feel like hearing it.   

[FitnessFrenzy]

here is the scene from the movie ghost dog, that I mention in the story:

[The True Adonis]

Are you sure you didn't help yourself to some of their product?

Ever watch the HGTV show, Tiny Houses? These minuscule abodes cost at minimum $20,000 to build.

I had an 8 X 8 foot garden shed built for about $3,500. There's no plumbing and no electrical involved. The walls aren't insulated and they are not clad on the inside.

You seem to be having a pipe dream. I wish you the best in your endeavor.

You got ripped off big time. 

[Primemuscle]

What the fuck are you talking about??  Its going to cost me at least $20,000 dollars for the land.  The $5,000 dollar cost is just for the cabin alone.  You should read first before posting which is something you've not been doing lately.  I don't need permits because I'm purchasing no restriction land and the home will be under 120 sq ft.  

I'm talking about this,

Actually I'm spending 5000 dollars for it.  Majority of money will be for land.   Unlike you I have actual talent and building skills.  Enjoy your cars and that stupid ass tattoo you have on your back

What is "it"? Seems like you were talking about the "all in cost". If you are spending $20,000 on land, you didn't make it clear in your above post.

I checked out what no restriction land means. It's not for me, I don't want to live where no one else wants to.

[Vince G, CSN MFT]

I'm talking about this,
What is "it"? Seems like you were talking about the "all in cost". If you are spending $20,000 on land, you didn't make it clear in your above post.

I checked out what no restriction land means. It's not for me, I don't want to live where no one else wants to.

I was responding to the cabin question.  The majority of the money will be spent on land.  I also don't care about your opinion about no restriction land.  If you want to be told when to mow your grass, what color to paint your house, and who should be at your home....well then that's your business.

Seems to me like you're trying to pick a fight with me.  I would strongly advise against it

[Costanza]

I was responding to the cabin question.  The majority of the money will be spent on land.  I also don't care about your opinion about no restriction land.  If you want to be told when to mow your grass, what color to paint your house, and who should be at your home....well then that's your business.

Seems to me like you're trying to pick a fight with me.  I would strongly advise against it

 
you number 1 vince

[FitnessFrenzy]

I was responding to the cabin question.  The majority of the money will be spent on land.  I also don't care about your opinion about no restriction land.  If you want to be told when to mow your grass, what color to paint your house, and who should be at your home....well then that's your business.

Seems to me like you're trying to pick a fight with me.  I would strongly advise against it

BOOM

[HTexan]

I was responding to the cabin question.  The majority of the money will be spent on land.  I also don't care about your opinion about no restriction land.  If you want to be told when to mow your grass, what color to paint your house, and who should be at your home....well then that's your business.

Seems to me like you're trying to pick a fight with me.  I would strongly advise against it

Are you saying you would take primemuscle into the snow naked?

[_aj_]

Endless closed thread of peace.

[Qwert II]

when is the new thread coming, like you promised, Goodrum?

Don't worry, his boy in India is working on it.

[AbrahamG]

Don't worry, his boy in India is working on it.

He sure is one sloppy hebrew.

[Qwert II]

He sure is one sloppy hebrew.

Apparently this is only due to the fact that he just came back from a 4th of July BBQ.

Normally Melvin Goodrum is a lean muscular Flotsam of a Jetsam.

[TonyAlva]

He sure is one sloppy hebrew.

the result of 100's of years of genetic engineering, ala "Jimmy the Greek" style..I call shenanigans

[calfzilla]

We need another "home wrecker" type story. It's been too long.

[HTexan]

so you're saying vince can turn a gay man straight? 

[AbrahamG]

I bet the Coach was really embarrassed to see you there with his family. 

LMFAO!

[AbrahamG]

Sweet Caroline, this is gold.

[Kwon]

Ok folks:


I had just left Planet Fitness (yes I work out there, its cheap) and decided to pick up some grub before I went home so I went to Moe's Southwest Grill.  When I walked in it was crowded but over in the corner was this white guy that I slept with the previous week.  To my astonishment, he was sitting with what I presumed to be his wife and 4 screaming little kids.  He looked over and somewhat cringed a bit and for good reason.  I have a general policy to where I don't mess with married guys as I've had some issues with that and he clearly lied.  It was a sobering moment to think that while he was telling his wife that he loved her, that he also loved 8 inches of my black kielbasa pounding his ass for a good 30 minutes and shooting all over his mouth (he wanted it).  


Anyway, I got distracted and the worker asked me what I wanted to order.  I took a deep breath and loudly announced that I wanted a HOMEWRECKER!!  The guy simply just shook his head and put it down on the table while his wife was asking if he had a headache.....


I rule.      

The Legendary Homowrecker-thread!

Kielbasa of peace.