Getbig.com: American Bodybuilding, Fitness and Figure
Getbig Female Info Boards => Open Talk for Girl Discussion => Topic started by: BayGBM on September 12, 2008, 08:07:57 AM
-
The author of "The Truth about Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do to Prevent It" was a guest on Oprah yesterday. He is a marriage counselor and his new book is based on interview with hundreds of couples over several years.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?docId=1000272661
A free copy of this book is available as a PDF. If you want it send me a PM with your email address.
-
I looked at the highlights
All of those things they say may mean he is cheating occur as part of any normal marriage and often mean nothing.
It is part of the ups and downs of marriage..
I see this book making already paranoid woman just more paranoid
You go Oprah ;D
-
SEXISM >:(
-
Does that apply to gay men as well, Bay?
-
Does that apply to gay men as well, Bay?
There may be a some overlap but as a general rule, I would say no.
-
There may be a some overlap but as a general rule, I would say no.
Why would that book interest you then?
-
None of those things are true.
It is about character.
A man who is going to cheat on his wife is going to cheat in his business and on his taxes.
-
None of those things are true.
It is about character.
A man who is going to cheat on his wife is going to cheat in his business and on his taxes.
Translation, your man cheated on you and you cant get his money in the divorce..
-
Why would I want to take money from a man I helped build up?
Money stopped matter a long time ago.
I am happy to be alive.
No joke.
But, on this one I am right.
Men cheat because of their character.
How could you not agree.
It is interesting to me when someone knows you are right. They cannot argue your point so they do this leveling thing like you do.
Don't you agree. Men cheat because of their character. That was the point.
-
Why would I want to take money from a man I helped build up?
Money stopped matter a long time ago.
I am happy to be alive.
No joke.
But, on this one I am right.
Men cheat because of their character.
How could you not agree.
It is interesting to me when someone knows you are right. They cannot argue your point so they do this leveling thing like you do.
Don't you agree. Men cheat because of their character. That was the point.
Men cheat cause God made us that way to further the species....plain and simple. Everything can be taken from what I just said. Women will never ever understand what a guy thinks when he wakes up and leaves the house. Every woman (literally) is scanned by every guy on the fact of which they would have sex with or not, its like this monkey on your back that is right there...the ones that do stay faithful, and there are ones that do have both a person they love more than themselves and keep themselves away from situations where they can cheat. Both have to be there for the man not to cheat....Im sorry if what i said was rude at first i was trying to be funny but i guess the man's character has alot to do with him being in places where he can cheat.
-
You don't need to say sorry. My ex always told me I was too sensitive.
Now I get that from the new guy.
So, not your fault.
So, I totally got it. It is like that one movie where Arnold Sw.-our governor, is scanning the jungle for the predator.
That's what you do - even if is for a second.
That makes sense. Perfect sense. So a man can have the prettiest, smartest girl on his side and he's doing the scanning thing.
I think marriages stay together because of vows before God. Honestly.
Like you are saying it is a primal thing. Yeah. And marriage is man made a social construciton.
So the mormons having 20 wives is the natural thing and we Christian girls are wrong?
-
To Baseballmom
Woman love to tell me "dont generalise"
I am saying the same thing back :-*
And bye the way lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of married, engaged or involved woman cheat as well >:(
-
To Baseballmom
Woman love to tell me "dont generalise"
I am saying the same thing back :-*
And bye the way lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of married, engaged or involved woman cheat as well >:(
While I am getting all of this free advice.
Can you tell me what it is about me that I cannot read anything say because all I can focus on is the fact that you spelled "bye" wrong.
Like, I think does this guy not know how to spell bye or he just made a mistake.
I think I had to proofread alot or something.
You know I'm just trying to lighten things up.
Hey, do you think on that cheaters show there will ever be someone who is packing and the Cheaters show walks in on the guy and pops off the Cheaters crew. It's just a matter of time. They are brave.
-
While I am getting all of this free advice.
Can you tell me what it is about me that I cannot read anything say because all I can focus on is the fact that you spelled "bye" wrong.
Like, I think does this guy not know how to spell bye or he just made a mistake.
I think I had to proofread alot or something.
You know I'm just trying to lighten things up.
Hey, do you think on that cheaters show there will ever be someone who is packing and the Cheaters show walks in on the guy and pops off the Cheaters crew. It's just a matter of time. They are brave.
Buy, by, bye does it matter as long as you understand what I am saying.
I am a technician not a linguist ;)
I don't watch cheaters, it is mainly the single bitter woman I work with who watch it.
But yes the chances are high that one day a "cheaters" guy will die.
Oh and did you notice that last sentence rhymed 8)
-
To Baseballmom
Woman love to tell me "dont generalise"
I am saying the same thing back :-*
And bye the way lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of married, engaged or involved woman cheat as well >:(
No shit? THEY DO?!?!?
-
He has already been stabbed so it cant be to long before he gets shot.
-
None of those things are true.
It is about character.
A man who is going to cheat on his wife is going to cheat in his business and on his taxes.
Not really, I know people who have cheated that are otherwise honest (not condoning the behavior). I've never done it but damn have I felt the urge to screw numerous women while being in relationships. It's weird because you can see, even in meaningless dating relationships, that the urge appears when you are bored in your relationship. For me it occurred when I wasn't getting any. ;D
I truly believe a sexually satisfied male will be less likely to cheat on his SO. Most women I hear talking about cheating reference a bad fight, boredom, less emotional closeness, etc as reasons for cheating. Most guys I know say "I was horny". Neither one is right but I can understand someone being horny and needed to fulfill that urge whereas I don't understand someone saying that their SO doesn't talk or hold hands enough and the remedy is having a dude lay some pipe for you.
One line I think sums it up best is from "City Slickers"...."Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place."
-
Men cheat because they arent getting any at home. Plain and simple.
-
Men cheat because they arent getting any at home. Plain and simple.
Nah i don't completely agree with that one...could be a little true but definately not the whole reason
-
Nah i don't completely agree with that one...could be a little true but definately not the whole reason
OK, let me clarify. Either they arent getting any or they are bored and its not like the porn they watch..
-
Nah i don't completely agree with that one...could be a little true but definately not the whole reason
I tend to agree with him. The only other guys I know who cheat just want to keep their numbers up or shouldn't be with one woman. Not trying to stir up trouble but most guys I know talk about "banging so and so" or "I would bang so and so" but they never do, the ones who do want/need sex.
-
Men cheat because they arent getting any at home. Plain and simple.
Yep.
-
Men cheat because they really want that muscle butt bear at the gym :P
-
So usually men are going to cheat with women.
Do they close their eyes and pretend or something?
-
Men cheat if they are not getting any. Or, if there not sexually satisfied. Maybe the girl just lays there everytime!
-
Don't you agree. Men cheat because of their character. That was the point.
No, I don't agree. Some men cheat...I don't. Because of my character. I want to cheat, of course, but I just don't.
-
How about a thread about women cheating. It would be a lot better. This 'man cheating topic' is overdone.
-
How about a thread about women cheating. It would be a lot better. This 'man cheating topic' is overdone.
Agreed.
-
Agreed.
Seriously, this shit is so played out and fuels the anti-male propaganda that women take full advantage of...it's a fucking joke. Time for women to get some payback.
-
Women cheat for more attention.
-
Women cheat for more attention.
Women don't even know why they fucking cheat; totally irrational creatures, don't even understand themselves.
-
Women don't even know why they fucking cheat; totally irrational creatures, don't even understand themselves.
Women generally cheat for attention.
Knowing why or why not is irrelevant because it always comes back to the same reason.
Men are more likely to chat for non-relationship reasons like sex, ego boost, immaturity or availability.
-
Are we talking in the biological sense or social sense?
I have seen numerous women cheat due to their immaturity and availability as well.
-
Are we talking in the biological sense or social sense?
I have seen numerous women cheat due to their immaturity and availability as well.
From a social standpoint it almost always comes back to a feeling of needing more attention than they are getting.
If you're talking biology it generally has to do with one guy having good DNA and the other being a better provider. Guys make new DNA all the time but women have a time limit. Outside that window, the chances of healthy children goes down pretty substantially. A 32yof has a 28% of having a child with some sort of developmental issue. Sure, 78% have no issue at that age but it definitely gets worse as time goes by. Some british guy did a ton of really great research on this.... he then promptly attempted writing something entertaining with his wife and created a piece of pure garbage called "Sperm Wars", proving once and for all that PhDs can't write sexy stuff. :)
-
From a social standpoint it almost always comes back to a feeling of needing more attention than they are getting.
If you're talking biology it generally has to do with one guy having good DNA and the other being a better provider. Guys make new DNA all the time but women have a time limit. Outside that window, the chances of healthy children goes down pretty substantially. A 32yof has a 28% of having a child with some sort of developmental issue. Sure, 78% have no issue at that age but it definitely gets worse as time goes by. Some british guy did a ton of really great research on this.... he then promptly attempted writing something entertaining with his wife and created a piece of pure garbage called "Sperm Wars", proving once and for all that PhDs can't write sexy stuff. :)
It seems that we have two choices: deal with their insanity or disengage from them. I find both quite difficult.
-
It seems that we have two choices: deal with their insanity or disengage from them. I find both quite difficult.
I love women and feel God put them here to make men better.... through constant testing, LOL!
-
I love women and feel God put them here to make men better.... through constant testing, LOL!
I like women too but in a certain way I hate them as well. Sometimes I would just like to have a situation such as: hey, I like you, me too; let's hang out and enjoy each other's company; I'm having a good time with you. Everything is cool.
Instead of...
Having to go to the police to get restraining orders and pressing charges for attempted murder. Dealing with multiple personalities that change every 10 minutes. Lying about (consciously or not) about how you feel and then 'changing' your mind all of a sudden, etc.
-
I like women too but in a certain way I hate them as well. Sometimes I would just like to have a situation such as: hey, I like you, me too; let's hang out and enjoy each other's company; I'm having a good time with you. Everything is cool.
Instead of...
Having to go to the police to get restraining orders and pressing charges for attempted murder. Dealing with multiple personalities that change every 10 minutes. Lying about (consciously or not) about how you feel and then 'changing' your mind all of a sudden, etc.
Man, as long as you date women, you can forget the top part... It will always be lying, conniving and restraint orders.
-
Man, as long as you date women, you can forget the top part... It will always be lying, conniving and restraint orders.
Super depressing. In fact I think it is one of the most depressing things in the world. :-\ I really do.
-
Super depressing. In fact I think it is one of the most depressing things in the world. :-\ I really do.
It's simple... you're a rational thinking man.
MAN.
She's a woman... emotional and problematic.
Women are crazy dude... just crazy... Sorry to have to break it to you.
We can cry together.
-
It's simple... you're a rational thinking man.
MAN.
She's a woman... emotional and problematic.
Women are crazy dude... just crazy... Sorry to have to break it to you.
We can cry together.
I know they are crazy. It's just that I love them so much and so am forced to deal with them; when I don't deal with them I get depressed but dealing with their insanity depresses me as well. It's a lose/lose situation anyway you look at it.
-
I know they are crazy. It's just that I love them so much and so am forced to deal with them; when I don't deal with them I get depressed but dealing with their insanity depresses me as well. It's a lose/lose situation anyway you look at it.
That's why we keep the launch codes for ourselves... We gotta maintain some way to get us out of the funk.
-
That's why we keep the launch codes for ourselves... We gotta maintain some way to get us out of the funk.
:'( :'( :'(
-
I typed this slow: we're all frigging crazy in some way!!
As far as I know, God has never seen fit to make a perfect person.
Find a woman with the kind of crazy that works with your own and be happy. :)
Life's way to short and it's probably your attitude towards women that's attracting all the crazies. WTF!? I'm reading like Stella and Cheri, LOL! Really better check my test levels. :)
-
I typed this slow: we're all frigging crazy in some way!!
As far as I know, God has never seen fit to make a perfect person.
Find a woman with the kind of crazy that works with your own and be happy. :)
Life's way to short and it's probably your attitude towards women that's attracting all the crazies. WTF!? I'm reading like Stella and Cheri, LOL! Really better check my test levels. :)
You sound like a chick...I have no idea. Hopeless.
-
I typed this slow: we're all frigging crazy in some way!!
As far as I know, God has never seen fit to make a perfect person.
Find a woman with the kind of crazy that works with your own and be happy. :)
Life's way to short and it's probably your attitude towards women that's attracting all the crazies. WTF!? I'm reading like Stella and Cheri, LOL! Really better check my test levels. :)
You want a chick that's crazy enough to do what you want in bed, but not so crazy as to stab you in the neck with a pencil because you looked at some boobs.
It's a fine line.
-
Are women insane?
Some time back, I was counseling with a gentleman who was having troubles with the lady in his life. In exasperation, he finally said, “They are insane!”
“Who is insane?” I inquired.
“Women,” he replied. “All women are insane.”
A few weeks ago, I was talking with another man who found his relationship with a certain female confusing. I said, “Well, one person I talked to said that it was his opinion that all women are insane.”
He pondered a moment and said, “I think I agree with that.”
“Really!” I replied. “So you think that men should treat all women as though they are mentally ill?”
“Probably,” he mused.
As we were standing outside the church on a Sunday morning, I decided to get a few opinions from the gentler sex. The first person I approached was a young mom with three children, two of whom are teenagers. After I explained the conversations that occurred, I asked if she thought the men had a valid point.
“They probably do,” she answered.
Surprised, I asked, “So you think that men would be better off if they just assumed that women were insane and acted as such?”
“Yep, probably.”
My next contact was with a mother of four small children. Again, I explained the situation and asked the lady’s thoughts.
“It’s probably true from a man’s point of view. I always want my husband to tell me what I want to hear and to do what I want him to do. I can see how he might think that’s crazy.”
Now, let me just state for the record that both the man with me, and I, were very surprised by the way these conversations were going. I’ve read “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: The Classic Guide for Understanding the Opposite Sex,” by John Gray, so I’ve understood for years that we come from different places and see things from a different perspective, but two women saying that the two men had a valid point left me — confused.
In essence, the two women were saying that the two men were — gasp! — right. Men are not accustomed to be being told they are right, especially by the women in their lives.
So, we decided to approach a professional, a lady who has served as a registered nurse for a number of years. When told what had been proposed, she said, “Oh, I don’t believe that at all! I don’t think that women are insane. I know I’m not insane.”
So, I asked her, “Do you think that most insane people know that they are insane?”
“Probably not,” she said.
“So,” I proffered, “you could actually be insane and not be aware of it, couldn’t you?”
I received “the look” that all women, from the day of their birth, are able to give men to chill their blood, and then she went into the church.
A few days later, I approached a college student, a young lady I have known all her life. I told her all about this and, looking for a more modern, progressive voice, I asked her if women were insane.
Without hesitation, she replied, “Oh, absolutely!”
So, do I think that all women are insane? Well, it certainly would explain a great many mysterious ways that have baffled men from the beginning of time.
All I can say is that, based on my limited survey, 100 percent of men surveyed say, “Yes”; 75 percent of women polled say, “Probably” or “Absolutely”; and 25 percent of women polled say, “No,” but they could be insane and not know it.
Who am I to argue with the polls? I’m not crazy.
-
I like women too but in a certain way I hate them as well. Sometimes I would just like to have a situation such as: hey, I like you, me too; let's hang out and enjoy each other's company; I'm having a good time with you. Everything is cool.
Instead of...
Having to go to the police to get restraining orders and pressing charges for attempted murder. Dealing with multiple personalities that change every 10 minutes. Lying about (consciously or not) about how you feel and then 'changing' your mind all of a sudden, etc.
I think you pick crazy
or you are crazy
or the both of you are crazy and they don't mesh well
whatever .. I just cannot think of charges for attempted murder and not think :
WOW THAT'S CRAZY :-[
why is it so many people think you must be with someone to be OK and content , when they try and fail so many times so quickly so easily ???
If you can't be at peace with being alone in between , it's not really cool to keep going on to the next , and the next , and so on
-
I think you pick crazy
or you are crazy
or the both of you are crazy and they don't mesh well
whatever .. I just cannot think of charges for attempted murder and not think :
WOW THAT'S CRAZY :-[
why is it so many people think you must be with someone to be OK and content , when they try and fail so many times so quickly so easily ???
If you can't be at peace with being alone in between , it's not really cool to keep going on to the next , and the next , and so on
I don't necessarily think that I have to be with someone to be content; that ex who tried to kill me was almost 10 years ago. Still I have been single for 4 years now; if you you were always alone for 4 years and were getting older, wouldn't it bother you? First 2 years were ok, after 3 it started to get old. I can assure you I am not crazy, though maybe I am too lonely...which could be a problem as well.
-
I don't necessarily think that I have to be with someone to be content; that ex who tried to kill me was almost 10 years ago.
sorry such a thing happened to you .. really
No one will ever be arrested for attempted murder .. for "trying" to kill me .. I'd either be dead or they would be .. simple as that .. that's just not anyplace I hope I ever have to go
yes that's saying I'm crazy .. I can live with that
Still I have been single for 4 years now; if you you were always alone for 4 years and were getting older, wouldn't it bother you? First 2 years were ok, after 3 it started to get old.
I'm with you 1000% .. but I really won't ever take the chance on being with somebody else again unless I know "everything" .. first .. no games .. no stroking each other with nicey nicey crap .. yeah it's gets very old and very lonesome ..but if I can't enjoy myself somehow everyday ..I won't be any better with someone else
I can assure you I am not crazy, though maybe I am too lonely...which could be a problem as well.
we are almost all crazy in some way ... not mental house rubber room NUTS .. but more than half of us have things that others would see as more than just odd
-
sorry such a thing happened to you .. really
No one will ever be arrested for attempted murder .. for "trying" to kill me .. I'd either be dead or they would be .. simple as that .. that's just not anyplace I hope I ever have to go
yes that's saying I'm crazy .. I can live with that
I'm with you 1000% .. but I really won't ever take the chance on being with somebody else again unless I know "everything" .. first .. no games .. no stroking each other with nicey nicey crap .. yeah it's gets very old and very lonesome ..but if I can't enjoy myself somehow everyday ..I won't be any better with someone else
we are almost all crazy in some way ... not mental house rubber room NUTS .. but more than half of us have things that others would see as more than just odd
I never knew you were single.
-
w8m8 that is totally incorrect. You could be somewhere, they drug you, shoot you with a muscle relaxer and something that will knock you out. Then they lock you up in a cave dungeon and just continuly sexually molest you then try to kill you, but somehow you stay alive, they leave thinking you are dead and you are still locked up.
Later on someone finds you because of your screams for help. Later on the subject is found because of DNA and arrested for attempted murder.
jt
-
Why do men cheat? Why do men enjoy a burgerking meal after eating at home all week?
-
Why do men cheat? Why do men enjoy a burgerking meal after eating at home all week?
Hardcore.
-
Why do men cheat? Why do men enjoy a burgerking meal after eating at home all week?
Because they need the grease? ;D
-
Because they need the grease? ;D
You are HOT! ;D
You are why men cheat! Hehehe! Hi Laura! >:(
-
You are HOT! ;D
You are why men cheat! Hehehe! Hi Laura! >:(
Hehehe, Hi Permie. :D
I'm still telling, now give me your wife's cell number. >:(
j/k ;D
-
Hehehe, Hi Permie. :D
I'm still telling, now give me your wife's cell number. >:(
j/k ;D
How u feeling these days??? We all hope you are doing well. Im sure Mike has been doing his part..
-
How u feeling these days??? We all hope you are doing well. Im sure Mike has been doing his part..
I'm feeling pretty good actually. The docs are still adjusting medication but all in all I've been doing well. Mike is wonderful. He's an angel. :)
-
I'm feeling pretty good actually. The docs are still adjusting medication but all in all I've been doing well. Mike is wonderful. He's an angel. :)
Great to hear!
You are still why men cheat! >:(
-
Great to hear!
You are still why men cheat! >:(
:)
Actually, I think they cheat because they're either board at home (sexually), or really don't want to be with their wife and just don't know how to get out of the relationship (they either don't want to hurt their wife because they still care about them, or they are afraid of losing something - money, house, kids, etc.). What ever the reason, I don't think anyone should cheat...for any reason. The one being cheated on is always hurt far more than if they were just left (broken up with) and it that hurt stays with them forever. Nothing good comes from cheating in a relationship. :-\
-
:)
Actually, I think they cheat because they're either board at home (sexually), or really don't want to be with their wife and just don't know how to get out of the relationship (they either don't want to hurt their wife because they still care about them, or they are afraid of losing something - money, house, kids, etc.). What ever the reason, I don't think anyone should cheat...for any reason. The one being cheated on is always hurt far more than if they were just left (broken up with) and it that hurt stays with them forever. Nothing good comes from cheating in a relationship. :-\
From this day forth.... You Laura Lee are getbigs relationship therapist! ;D oops, I mean.. >:(
-
:)
Actually, I think they cheat because they're either board at home (sexually), or really don't want to be with their wife and just don't know how to get out of the relationship (they either don't want to hurt their wife because they still care about them, or they are afraid of losing something - money, house, kids, etc.). What ever the reason, I don't think anyone should cheat...for any reason. The one being cheated on is always hurt far more than if they were just left (broken up with) and it that hurt stays with them forever. Nothing good comes from cheating in a relationship. :-\
Hmmm...men cheat? I have never cheated but 2 of my exes (women) cheated on me.
-
I also think that men cheat on there wifes, cuz they are bored sexually.
My ex-boyfriend didn't know what happend when we stepped into his bed the first time ;)
He had just ended a 2 year relationship before we met, and after a few weeks he
told me that he had cheated on his ex-girlfriend alot, cuz she layed there like a dead fish. :o
Although we're not together anymore, we're still good friends.
-
I also think that men cheat on there wifes, cuz they are bored sexually.
My ex-boyfriend didn't know what happend when we stepped into his bed the first time ;)
He had just ended a 2 year relationship before we met, and after a few weeks he
told me that he had cheated on his ex-girlfriend alot, cuz she layed there like a dead fish. :o
Although we're not together anymore, we're still good friends.
Just what exactly are you implying in youre avatar "Dani"? ;D
-
From this day forth.... You Laura Lee are getbigs relationship therapist! ;D oops, I mean.. >:(
Lol, I'll talk like Dr. Ruth. ;D
-
Hmmm...men cheat? I have never cheated but 2 of my exes (women) cheated on me.
Not all men cheat. Some will stay faithful no matter what.
I'm sorry to hear of your exes doing that to you Decide. There are a lot of women out there that will do the same, unfortunately. :(
I guess some people need to have better "communication" with their sig others. Let them know know that they are unhappy...whether it be in the bedroom or out of the bedroom. Communication is the key. ;)
-
Not all men cheat. Some will stay faithful no matter what.
I'm sorry to hear of your exes doing that to you Decide. There are a lot of women out there that will do the same, unfortunately. :(
I guess some people need to have better "communication" with their sig others. Let them know know that they are unhappy...whether it be in the bedroom or out of the bedroom. Communication is the key. ;)
I cheat... Why not?
Do unto others before they do unto you.
-
Just what exactly are you implying in youre avatar "Dani"? ;D
In my best Dr. Ruth imitation "well mr. permabulker, she is stating not implying that bigger is indeed better. how you take her statement ... depends on you ;)"
-
In my best Dr. Ruth imitation "well mr. permabulker, she is stating not implying that bigger is indeed better. how you take her statement ... depends on you ;)"
>:(
;)
;D
-
Just what exactly are you implying in youre avatar "Dani"? ;D
@ Permabulker: Not trying to imply anything
-
When a man cheats he's only thinking about "Beep, beep, beep...."
-
because women drive them to it.