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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: Alex23 on November 11, 2008, 05:50:20 PM

Title: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Alex23 on November 11, 2008, 05:50:20 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: avesher on November 11, 2008, 06:03:24 PM
no comment Im terrified of flying
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Disgusted on November 11, 2008, 06:07:52 PM
No one is more afraid of flying than me.  :'(
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: TrueGrit on November 11, 2008, 06:12:23 PM
I am not afraid of flying but I am terrified of taking off and landing (when most accidents occur)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gordiano on November 11, 2008, 06:13:15 PM
I can honestly say I'm more worried about Roller Coasters, than I am flying. And yes, I love coasters!
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Ursus on November 11, 2008, 06:13:33 PM
safest way to travel.

I love the take off where you pick up so much speed from nowhere then before you know it you ae in the air
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Disgusted on November 11, 2008, 06:14:22 PM
You know what they say, it ain't the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop at the end.  ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gordiano on November 11, 2008, 06:15:37 PM
Speaking of flying......I heard that South West Airlines has great deals on flights to Dubai, India.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: nycbull on November 11, 2008, 06:15:47 PM
Alex, my bf was in Palm Springs this weekend looking at real estate, says there are amazing deals and they are only getting better.

Is Palm Springs a good investment?, will it ever come back or is it destined to be overridden with Mexicans and crime.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gordiano on November 11, 2008, 06:16:41 PM
Alex, my bf was in Palm Springs this weekend looking at real estate, says there are amazing deals and they are only getting better.

Is Palm Springs a good investment?, will it ever come back or is it destined to be overridden with Mexicans and crime.



 ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: PANDAEMONIUM on November 11, 2008, 06:49:51 PM
I can honestly say I'm more worried about Roller Coasters, than I am flying. And yes, I love coasters!

I hear ya.  I fly dozens of times a year for work so I'm pretty used to it.  But roller coasters...no way...ever....
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gordiano on November 11, 2008, 07:09:10 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

Alex, you should have just elbowed him right in the face, ala Arnold in "Commando". Then told the stewardess, "please don't bother my friend....he's dead tired."
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: G o a t b o y on November 11, 2008, 07:17:05 PM
I'm not afraid of flying, but I tell my doctor I am so he prescribes me benzos.   ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: hipolito mejia on November 11, 2008, 07:21:26 PM
safest way to travel.

I love the take off where you pick up so much speed from nowhere then before you know it you ae in the air

But if something goes "wrong" is the fastest way to meet "St. Pedro".   :(
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: nycbull on November 11, 2008, 07:23:37 PM
i developed claustrophobia recently and its not pretty, but as long as Im on the aisle seat its ok,  its scary once it starts so I understand this guys panic, but he was in first class not like he was in the last seat against the bathroom or something
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: BFP on November 11, 2008, 07:25:14 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

Add him to your linkedin account!

Jason
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: ASJChaotic on November 11, 2008, 07:26:41 PM
No one is more afraid of flying than me.  :'(
I think there is one person....AXA  :'(
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: hipolito mejia on November 11, 2008, 07:42:12 PM
i developed claustrophobia recently and its not pretty, but as long as Im on the aisle seat its ok,  its scary once it starts so I understand this guys panic, but he was in first class not like he was in the last seat against the bathroom or something

Just pray that u nevert have to be stucked on a plane for 2 hours before it actually takes off !!  Thats claustrophobia at its best !!!
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: The Coach on November 11, 2008, 07:42:22 PM
No one is more afraid of flying than me.  :'(

Ditto....I'm a freaking train wreck when I fly. I'll take an ambian with a couple glasses of wine and I'm get so freaked out the ambian and wine doesn't hit until we land. While I was building my business I used to be a industrial roof consultant and did all the spec work for most of the Ford and GM plants throughout the mid-west and east and flew about 15-20,000mi per year, even with that many miles logged I never got used to it.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: The Freakshow on November 11, 2008, 07:44:25 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

was it sharma ???
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 07:56:32 PM
i think this story doesnt belong here but in my last trip to canada, i was adding my last posts to getbig while waiting @ airport (just in case my plane crashed) and i saw a man walking with a cane, black sunglasses and a dog.
Myself being the idiot i am, started to sing "i wear my sunglasses at night so i can so i can" and i think the guy didnt notice, i kept looking at him and found out he wasnt looking for drugs but he was a blind man.
Fine, he walked again and i sticked to my getbig posting. 2 hours later we were called to get on the plane and for some reason, i thought "god damn i wonder if god is gonna kill me for laughing at a blind man" seriously, by then i understood i did wrong but it was already too late, no return and some nice canadian girl was inviting me to quickly go to the boarding gate.
I swear i was pretty worried, i knew god was about to make me pay, while i was heading to the airplane's gate, i realized i deserved to die, i looked for it, laughed at a blind man, very low.
At the airplane's main entrance, the lady checked my seat, told me where to seat, and i saw the airplane in flames in my mind, until i finally reached my seat and i found out, the man i made fun of him, was sitting in the middle row, with his dog on the floor, quiet, and even said hello (how? i guess he felt me).
During the whole trip, we didnt share a single word, the dog didnt move at all for 10-11 hours.
When we arrived to iran, i mean, canada, the man said goodbye.
Jesus taught me a lesson that day, and ill never laugh again at a blind man  :)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: chaos on November 11, 2008, 07:57:29 PM
Just pray that u nevert have to be stucked on a plane for 2 hours before it actually takes off !!  Thats claustrophobia at its best !!!
Dallas is horrible for that. I sat on a plane with little bastards running around for 2.5 hours because of a little lightning. ::)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: NaturalWonder83 on November 11, 2008, 07:57:47 PM
i think this story doesnt belong here but in my last trip to canada, i was adding my last posts to getbig while waiting @ airport (just in case my plane crashed) and i saw a man walking with a cane, black sunglasses and a dog.
Myself being the idiot i am, started to sing "i wear my sunglasses at night so i can so i can" and i think the guy didnt notice, i kept looking at him and found out he wasnt looking for drugs but he was a blind man.
Fine, he walked again and i sticked to my getbig posting. 2 hours later we were called to get on the plane and for some reason, i thought "god damn i wonder if god is gonna kill me for laughing at a blind man" seriously, by then i understood i did wrong but it was already too late, no return and some nice canadian girl was inviting me to quickly take go to the boarding gate.
I swear i was pretty worried, i knew god was about to make me pay, while i was heading to the airplane's gate, i realized i deserved to die, i looked for it, laughed at a blind man, very low.
At the airplane's main entrance, the lady checked my seat, told me where to seat, and i saw the airplane in flames in my mind, until i finally reached my seat and i found out, the man i made fun of him, was sitting in the middle row, with his dog on the floor, quiet, and even said hello (how? i guess he felt me).
During the whole trip, we didnt share a single word, the dog didnt move at all for 10-11 hours.
When we arrived to iran, i mean, canada, the man said goodbye.
Jesus taught me a lesson that day, and ill never laugh again at a blind man  :)
im glad u are safe now benz
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: The.Giant on November 11, 2008, 08:06:07 PM
my older brother is afraid of flying...and we're in Canada.

such a fag.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Buffgeek on November 11, 2008, 08:06:33 PM
You are on a bomb with wings when flying.  The wings are full of fuel and you have oxygen tanks above you. Basically if you crash you are fubar'd.

I just pop a couple of Zanax and im good.   ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 11, 2008, 08:10:52 PM
the non-stop flight to Qatar is 18 hrs. they serve 7 meals and all the wine you can drink.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: kh300 on November 11, 2008, 08:13:47 PM
i average 20-80 hrs in the sky a week..
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 08:18:53 PM
the non-stop flight to Qatar is 18 hrs. they serve 7 meals and all the wine you can drink.

non stop flight in .... 18 hours? sounds like you are stupid :)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: 240 is Back on November 11, 2008, 08:19:07 PM
i average 20-80 hrs in the sky a week..

what is your experience with the airplane restrooms?  Do you time meals to avoid crapping in them?  Do they always smell bad?  or are they fairly upscale?  I haven't flown in years, and the only view I've had of them involve porn clips.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 08:20:28 PM
what is your experience with the airplane restrooms?  Do you time meals to avoid crapping in them?  Do they always smell bad?  or are they fairly upscale?  I haven't flown in years, and the only view I've had of them involve porn clips.

i would never ever take a shit @ airplane restrooms, especially in the america<->asia route
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: 240 is Back on November 11, 2008, 08:21:11 PM
i would never ever take a shit @ airplane restrooms, especially in the america<->asia route

kh300 lives in planes though, so I'm guessing he ends up getting to know the facilities pretty darn well.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 08:24:28 PM
kh300 lives in planes though, so I'm guessing he ends up getting to know the facilities pretty darn well.

i know them pretty good aswel, even the ones at newest boeing & airbus planes
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 11, 2008, 08:43:09 PM
non stop flight in .... 18 hours? sounds like you are stupid :)
one time i took the one the stops in london, fagetaboutit..that was like 26 hours total; one way
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 08:49:49 PM
one time i took the one the stops in london, fagetaboutit..that was like 26 hours total; one way

im sure theres no plane and/or flights yet offering a 18 hours non stop flight.. maybe you were the first and only  ::)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Tapeworm on November 11, 2008, 08:57:00 PM
Know how they say you're supposed to picture members of an audience naked in order to calm yourself down for public speaking?  

Next time you board a plane, just imagine what everyone in there would look like screaming and freaking out moments before impact.  Envision the people in the back crying out for help as the fuselage snaps in half and they get sucked out of the plane and fall away screaming into the inky blackness of the cold night sky.  See the polite strangers sitting next to eachother exchange a final look of terror through the liquid fire atmosphere with their precious oxygen masks melting to their charred skin, before their eyeballs boil out of their skulls and they endure their final moments in a sightless deafening world of hellish agony.

That always cheers me up.

If it doesn't work, just talk to the person next to you.  "You know, I may be the last person you'll ever see" is a pretty good opening line.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 11, 2008, 08:58:01 PM
isnt DOH in india?
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 09:01:13 PM
isnt DOH in india?

you are the first human on earth that can confirm 18 hours on a plane non stop haha
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 11, 2008, 09:05:03 PM
you are the first human on earth that can confirm 18 hours on a plane non stop haha
sorry, it was almost 16 but felt like 18 :)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 09:05:42 PM
sorry, it was almost 16 but felt like 18 :)

16? damn im sure you are still the only human on earth
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 11, 2008, 09:11:55 PM
16? damn im sure you are still the only human on earth
not only that; plus i dont drink or take drugs and about a year ago i flew over non-stop for a 2 day conference and flew back non-stop, that was insane.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 11, 2008, 09:14:10 PM
not only that; plus i dont drink or take drugs and about a year ago i flew over non-stop for a 2 day conference and flew back non-stop, that was insane.

i believe you  ;D

there are longer routes though, such as newark->singapore, almost 19 hours... i'd rather have a 6 hours stop to smoke a pack of cigarettes than a stupid 19 hours flight just to arrive early lol
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: BFP on November 11, 2008, 09:16:29 PM
isnt DOH in india?

I believe that is the abbreviation for Dubai, yes.

Jason
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: G o a t b o y on November 11, 2008, 09:25:38 PM
I believe that is the abbreviation for Dubai, yes.

Jason

DOH = Doha  (India  ;D)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: BFP on November 11, 2008, 09:28:04 PM
DOH = Doha  (India  ;D)

 ;D  I thought Doha was in Sudan somewhere? Or Etheopia ;D

Jason
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: 240 is Back on November 11, 2008, 09:28:37 PM
DOH = Dubai O'Hare.

In Dubai O'Hare, you are given seating preference based upon your LBM.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: elite_lifter on November 11, 2008, 09:31:05 PM
More likely to die in an auto accident then in a plane crash, pussies.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Disgusted on November 11, 2008, 09:35:15 PM
Know how they say you're supposed to picture members of an audience naked in order to calm yourself down for public speaking?  

Next time you board a plane, just imagine what everyone in there would look like screaming and freaking out moments before impact.  Envision the people in the back crying out for help as the fuselage snaps in half and they get sucked out of the plane and fall away screaming into the inky blackness of the cold night sky.  See the polite strangers sitting next to eachother exchange a final look of terror through the liquid fire atmosphere with their precious oxygen masks melting to their charred skin, before their eyeballs boil out of their skulls and they endure their final moments in a sightless deafening world of hellish agony.

That always cheers me up.

If it doesn't work, just talk to the person next to you.  "You know, I may be the last person you'll ever see" is a pretty good opening line.

Gee, thanks for convincing me to NEVER fly again. You just ruined the rest of my life and now you are......SUED!
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: IFBBwannaB on November 11, 2008, 09:40:07 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

So you finally joined the mile high club? Did he do you doggy style in the restroom?
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: JOHN MATRIX on November 11, 2008, 09:52:08 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm..gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.
LMAO. you should have told him this right as he was looking at you with fear-filled eyes.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Alex23 on November 11, 2008, 10:33:34 PM
LMAO. you should have told him this right as he was looking at you with fear-filled eyes.


Hahahaha I have a soul, 'john matrix', I couldn't let that tool perish by the emotions. Yea he grabbed my 19 inchers. ;D

Now thatI think of it, I should've benneted his ass and said "blow some steam" (throwing a 4" pipe). 
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Tapeworm on November 11, 2008, 10:40:24 PM
Gee, thanks for convincing me to NEVER fly again. You just ruined the rest of my life and now you are......SUED!

 ;D

"So... ya got your Last Will in order?"
"Promise me you'll look after my boy if I don't make it."
"I heard this is the last time they're gonna let this particular plane fly."

All excellent ice breakers with your new plane buddy.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Disgusted on November 12, 2008, 12:56:45 AM
Omg   ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Fatpanda on November 12, 2008, 01:13:40 AM
i'm so afraid of flying that i take a holdall that contains what i call my survival pack:

clear plastic bag ( to put over my head if we crash in the atlantic ocean, it will give me valuable extra air and allow me to look for the exits)
a set of goggles to see under water
an underwater flashlight
some potatoe chips, candy bars and water (all sealed air tight)
mobile phone fully charged ( in water proof bag)

basically this all counts on the fact that we will crash in the ocean/sea.

i also have other survival packs for other situations  :-\

yes i have issues  :(

however if you fail to plan you plan to fail.  :)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gracie bjj on November 12, 2008, 02:13:28 AM
i am terrified of flying also,i do it but not without my benzo,s ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: webcake on November 12, 2008, 02:15:37 AM
A lot of bitches in this thread...
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Nordic Beast on November 12, 2008, 04:05:17 AM
Know how they say you're supposed to picture members of an audience naked in order to calm yourself down for public speaking?  

Next time you board a plane, just imagine what everyone in there would look like screaming and freaking out moments before impact.  Envision the people in the back crying out for help as the fuselage snaps in half and they get sucked out of the plane and fall away screaming into the inky blackness of the cold night sky.  See the polite strangers sitting next to eachother exchange a final look of terror through the liquid fire atmosphere with their precious oxygen masks melting to their charred skin, before their eyeballs boil out of their skulls and they endure their final moments in a sightless deafening world of hellish agony.

That always cheers me up.

If it doesn't work, just talk to the person next to you.  "You know, I may be the last person you'll ever see" is a pretty good opening line.
you just gave me a raging boner
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Tapeworm on November 12, 2008, 04:07:29 AM
you just gave me a raging boner

Excuse me stewardess.  I'd like to change seats if possible.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Nordic Beast on November 12, 2008, 04:25:10 AM
Excuse me stewardess.  I'd like to change seats if possible.
do you know how to fly "stick"?? ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: spinnis on November 12, 2008, 04:38:00 AM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

A true business man would use this opportunity to his advantage because he probably feels like he owe you something.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Thin Lizzy on November 12, 2008, 04:59:36 AM
You are on a bomb with wings when flying.  The wings are full of fuel and you have oxygen tanks above you. Basically if you crash you are fubar'd.

I just pop a couple of Zanax and im good.   ;D

I actually enjoy the flying part. It's the crashing and bursting into flames that makes me uneasy.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Ursus on November 12, 2008, 05:44:30 AM
I saw a 16year old girl trapped under a bus yesterday in town. I still cant stop thinking about it. Poor girl died last night. Was on the news.

Some fucking Japs beside me whipped out their iphone and took a pic. I said to myself if they do it again i swear to god i am slapping one of them. Sick and disrespectful
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: bigdumbbell on November 12, 2008, 05:51:03 AM
I saw a 16year old girl trapped under a bus yesterday in town. I still cant stop thinking about it. Poor girl died last night. Was on the news.

Some fucking Japs beside me whipped out their iphone and took a pic. I said to myself if they do it again i swear to god i am slapping one of them. Sick and disrespectful
link ?
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: spinnis on November 12, 2008, 05:51:32 AM
I saw a 16year old girl trapped under a bus yesterday in town. I still cant stop thinking about it. Poor girl died last night. Was on the news.

Some fucking Japs beside me whipped out their iphone and took a pic. I said to myself if they do it again i swear to god i am slapping one of them. Sick and disrespectful

you should have slapped them right away you fucking pussy!

" I said to myself" bla bla bla bunch of excuses, you wouldnt have done nothing. I fucking hate it when people talk like that.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: The_Punisher on November 12, 2008, 06:11:29 AM
Flying is fun, until the plane drops thousand of feet and suddenly Crashes...... ;D ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Meso_z on November 12, 2008, 06:11:49 AM
i think this story doesnt belong here but in my last trip to canada, i was adding my last posts to getbig while waiting @ airport (just in case my plane crashed) and i saw a man walking with a cane, black sunglasses and a dog.
Myself being the idiot i am, started to sing "i wear my sunglasses at night so i can so i can" and i think the guy didnt notice, i kept looking at him and found out he wasnt looking for drugs but he was a blind man.
Fine, he walked again and i sticked to my getbig posting. 2 hours later we were called to get on the plane and for some reason, i thought "god damn i wonder if god is gonna kill me for laughing at a blind man" seriously, by then i understood i did wrong but it was already too late, no return and some nice canadian girl was inviting me to quickly go to the boarding gate.
I swear i was pretty worried, i knew god was about to make me pay, while i was heading to the airplane's gate, i realized i deserved to die, i looked for it, laughed at a blind man, very low.
At the airplane's main entrance, the lady checked my seat, told me where to seat, and i saw the airplane in flames in my mind, until i finally reached my seat and i found out, the man i made fun of him, was sitting in the middle row, with his dog on the floor, quiet, and even said hello (how? i guess he felt me).
During the whole trip, we didnt share a single word, the dog didnt move at all for 10-11 hours.
When we arrived to iran, i mean, canada, the man said goodbye.
Jesus taught me a lesson that day, and ill never laugh again at a blind man  :)

seems like you "practice" your internet behaviour in real life too, "benz".
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: benz on November 12, 2008, 07:29:47 AM
seems like you "practice" your internet behaviour in real life too, "benz".

when you never expect it, jesus will teach you who is the boss.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: The Showstoppa on November 12, 2008, 07:33:26 AM
my older brother is afraid of flying...and we're in Canada.

such a fag.

well, cut the guy some slack....he is Canadian afterall...
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Complex Carbs on November 12, 2008, 07:39:38 AM
fuck off anyone that knows a salut. and fuck off .
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Butterbean on November 12, 2008, 07:42:38 AM
what is your experience with the airplane restrooms?  Do you time meals to avoid crapping in them?  Do they always smell bad?  or are they fairly upscale?  I haven't flown in years, and the only view I've had of them involve porn clips.
Try to avoid #2 if possible.  If you have to do anything though, try to time it so you use the restroom right before everyone else eats because inevitably someone is going to lay one after their meal.  But actually this is preferable to the person that does not lay one and rips them the rest of the flight.

Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: jaejonna on November 12, 2008, 07:46:12 AM
flying is fun
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Rimbaud on November 12, 2008, 07:48:11 AM
I hate flying but I've never freaked out. A couple Valium & a beer or two before the flight & I'm good to go.  ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: chester_bbb on November 12, 2008, 08:25:55 AM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

Did they make you buy two seats because your fatass can't fit into one? ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: jaejonna on November 12, 2008, 08:55:53 AM
I hate flying but I've never freaked out. A couple Valium & a beer or two before the flight & I'm good to go.  ;D
I like flying but i always get destroyed before i take flight, so i can pass out on the plane....

the worst was when i was on the way back from spring break, i took three 'totem poles' (zanax) ....last thing i remember was jumping out the car to go into the airport (Sat night) ...then i woke up in bed at home with class that morning (Mon. morning) ...the crazy part was thinking ...damn i remember having a transfer in Atlanta and everytime i go to atl, i know i have to take a airport subway of sorts...how did i manage to swing that ? lol ....ahhhhh college.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: CalvinH on November 12, 2008, 09:01:30 AM
I have no problems flying.
I get on a plane and it's like I drank a bottle of Jack and took a whole bottle of sleeping pills.It's lights out for me.
I sleep right through take off.I slept through a whole flight from Chicago to Hawaii :-\
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: JOHN MATRIX on November 12, 2008, 09:23:54 AM
I have no problems flying.
I get on a plane and it's like I drank a bottle of Jack and took a whole bottle of sleeping pills.It's lights out for me.
I sleep right through take off.I slept through a whole flight from Chicago to Hawaii :-\
if your gonna try well, stick around gonna cry? just move along, if your gonna die, your gonna die gonna die! die with your boots on
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: CalvinH on November 12, 2008, 09:37:04 AM
if your gonna try well, stick around gonna cry? just move along, if your gonna die, your gonna die gonna die! die with your boots on


13,the beast is rising,
the Frenchman did surmise,
through earthquakes and starvation,
the warlord will arise.
 8)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Rimbaud on November 12, 2008, 09:38:15 AM
I like flying but i always get destroyed before i take flight, so i can pass out on the plane....

the worst was when i was on the way back from spring break, i took three 'totem poles' (zanax) ....last thing i remember was jumping out the car to go into the airport (Sat night) ...then i woke up in bed at home with class that morning (Mon. morning) ...the crazy part was thinking ...damn i remember having a transfer in Atlanta and everytime i go to atl, i know i have to take a airport subway of sorts...how did i manage to swing that ? lol ....ahhhhh college.

You're an animal, that's insane.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: JOHN MATRIX on November 12, 2008, 10:27:41 AM

13,the beast is rising,
the Frenchman did surmise,
through earthquakes and starvation,
the warlord will arise.
 8)
maybe my favorite Maiden song! 8) it offers life lessons and how you should approach things
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: TommyBoy on November 12, 2008, 10:51:03 AM
Alex, if you really knew what the hell happened behind the scenes with flying you would be terrified. Well, anyone would really...unless you totally blocked out the actual likelihood of mishaps. You don't hear about mishaps every day but they happen EVERY DAY. In multiple parts of the country/world.

I had ZERO fear of flying before I became an air traffic controller. Now? Oh God I hate it. I've seen more mishaps, crashes, planes sliding off runways, and DAILY emergencies I can count.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Camel Jockey on November 12, 2008, 10:57:57 AM
Sipping a drink while flying and reading a nice book or article is awesome. The heavy air conditioning usually makes me sleep well too.  8)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: onlyme on November 12, 2008, 10:58:36 AM
When I used to fly alot I would always think about what i would do as the plane was going down.  I always tried to find the hottest girl on the plane and imagine me fucking her while the plane went down.  Yes kind of weird but back then I was weird.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: nycbull on November 12, 2008, 11:18:23 AM
Alex, if you really knew what the hell happened behind the scenes with flying you would be terrified. Well, anyone would really...unless you totally blocked out the actual likelihood of mishaps. You don't hear about mishaps every day but they happen EVERY DAY. In multiple parts of the country/world.

I had ZERO fear of flying before I became an air traffic controller. Now? Oh God I hate it. I've seen more mishaps, crashes, planes sliding off runways, and DAILY emergencies I can count.

agree thats why I think I have developed claustrophobia as I have gotten older not because its genetic but because I have lost trust in people and
stopped believing that everyone is an expert and that things are taken care of.... People are incompetent including pilots and air plane mechanics.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Butterbean on November 12, 2008, 11:45:09 AM
Once we were on a plane that was pulling out of the gate in Atlanta and we hit a luggage cart ::)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Meso_z on November 12, 2008, 12:34:10 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.


HAHAHAHA
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Ursus on November 12, 2008, 01:20:29 PM
you should have slapped them right away you fucking pussy!

" I said to myself" bla bla bla bunch of excuses, you wouldnt have done nothing. I fucking hate it when people talk like that.

I should slap you for having the audacity to call me a pussy
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: onlyme on November 12, 2008, 02:25:01 PM
Once we were on a plane that was pulling out of the gate in Atlanta and we hit a luggage cart ::)

We just landed at Miami and was at the gate and people stood up before they announced we could and all of a sudden the plane shook really bad and knocked over a bunch of people.  It lasted maybe 20 seconds or so.  Several big thuds against the side of the plane too.  It ended up that the A/C was too close to the plane and the hose they use got sucked up by one of the engines and it destroyed the engine which was lucky it didn't blow up and it shot the nozzle out the back end right into another truck.  I mean the plane was shaking really bad and people screaming.  It ended up we had to stay on the plane for a couple hours.  It was pretty intense especially since we had landed and were on the ground.  this was back around 1988 or so
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: kh300 on November 12, 2008, 05:36:18 PM
what is your experience with the airplane restrooms?  Do you time meals to avoid crapping in them?  Do they always smell bad?  or are they fairly upscale?  I haven't flown in years, and the only view I've had of them involve porn clips.

well i have to inspect them every flight i go on, weather i use the toilet or not. they are always clean, unless of course someone blows its up -no pun inteaded..
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: kh300 on November 12, 2008, 05:40:20 PM
if you are afraid of flying there is nothing to be ashamed of.. unless your a fucking retard you know driving is 100x's more dangerous.. the only reason why you dont like to fly is because your not in control.. any honest man can relate to that..
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: tbombz on November 12, 2008, 05:45:14 PM
so are you going to post flexingtons business card or not ?  :D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: onlyme on November 12, 2008, 07:57:56 PM

1)  why the fuck would they make you stay on the plane for hours??  How much sense does that make?

2)  congratulations on telling a story from the 80's that doesn't involve celebrities and sports cars!  :D

No celebrities on the plane.  And I have no idea except that they took alot of statements from people.  When I got into the terminal I looked at the plane and it fucked up on the side and their were metals parts all over the ground.  I did get my leather Tumi garmet bag stolen does that count as something
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Disgusted on November 12, 2008, 11:08:51 PM
I saw a 16year old girl trapped under a bus yesterday in town. I still cant stop thinking about it. Poor girl died last night. Was on the news.

Some fucking Japs beside me whipped out their iphone and took a pic. I said to myself if they do it again i swear to god i am slapping one of them. Sick and disrespectful

In Belfast?
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: tu_holmes on November 12, 2008, 11:13:07 PM
That guy was ridiculous...

I guess he doesn't have a frequent flyer card.

:)
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: gordiano on November 13, 2008, 12:10:04 AM
Alex, if you really knew what the hell happened behind the scenes with flying you would be terrified. Well, anyone would really...unless you totally blocked out the actual likelihood of mishaps. You don't hear about mishaps every day but they happen EVERY DAY. In multiple parts of the country/world.

I had ZERO fear of flying before I became an air traffic controller. Now? Oh God I hate it. I've seen more mishaps, crashes, planes sliding off runways, and DAILY emergencies I can count.

Hi John Madden!
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: D-bol on November 14, 2008, 12:23:47 AM
maybe this video makes everyone feel safer (nobody dies, I promise):


Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Tombo on November 14, 2008, 01:05:08 AM
dude this is by far the funniest thread alex has ever made
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Alex23 on November 14, 2008, 01:48:01 PM
I like flying but i always get destroyed before i take flight, so i can pass out on the plane....

the worst was when i was on the way back from spring break, i took three 'totem poles' (zanax) ....last thing i remember was jumping out the car to go into the airport (Sat night) ...then i woke up in bed at home with class that morning (Mon. morning) ...the crazy part was thinking ...damn i remember having a transfer in Atlanta and everytime i go to atl, i know i have to take a airport subway of sorts...how did i manage to swing that ? lol ....ahhhhh college.

hahah yes the train between the terminals can be brutal... doing that in radar mode is quite an exploit.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Stavios on November 14, 2008, 02:08:04 PM
Flew in from SAN to PDX earlier today...

I get to Alaska's counter to get first class upgrade.. nice, spot available; this should be short and sweet, hope they have spicy tomato this time, I like my bloody marrys spicy.

As I sit down and put my headset on, I notice that nervous sweating tool sitting next to me.. as we leave the tarmac, the tool starts hyper ventilating and ringing for an attendant. She shows up and he's already in full blown panic attack mode. Some old lady chimes in and says she has xanax. The tool pops one, turns around  to me and says something like: "talk to me man"... then he grabs my arm.. gayer than squatting on a lubed cucumber....

the tool survived and gave me his business card. I'm now debating if I should internetize it or not.


Discuss.

hahaha remembers me of a good story.

2 years ago I went to San Andres, it's a 7 hours flight from montreal.
After about 30 minutes in the air, my girlfriend at the time started getting nervous and hyper-ventilating until the stewart came with his oxygene thing.

30 minutes, she start hyper-ventlating again and for whatever reasons, she decide to go to the toilets.
she lost concience in the alley and i was like (daaaaaaamn fucking attention whore..). The stewart comes again and while he was taking care of her, a group of 4 girls started to talk to me because they recognized me from a party I went to a week earlier. they were fucking hot.

when my girlfriend woke up, she saw me laughing and telling stories to the 4 girls and she was pissed off the whole vacations  ;D
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: TommyBoy on November 14, 2008, 02:16:59 PM
Hi John Madden!

...whuh?
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: tu_holmes on November 14, 2008, 03:13:52 PM
...whuh?

John Madden takes a bus everywhere... He is afraid to fly... He has never flown in his entire life that I'm aware of.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: TommyBoy on November 14, 2008, 03:59:20 PM
John Madden takes a bus everywhere... He is afraid to fly... He has never flown in his entire life that I'm aware of.

Oh.
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: tu_holmes on November 14, 2008, 04:03:10 PM
hahah yes the train between the terminals can be brutal... doing that in radar mode is quite an exploit.

If you walk on the moving walkway, you actually generally beat the trains in Atlanta as well... It's a ridiculously large airport and is now the busiest passenger airport in the world... Insane.

I remember when it was maybe top 10, now it's number 1.

Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Alex23 on November 14, 2008, 10:01:11 PM
If you walk on the moving walkway, you actually generally beat the trains in Atlanta as well... It's a ridiculously large airport and is now the busiest passenger airport in the world... Insane.

I remember when it was maybe top 10, now it's number 1.



crazy... beating O'Hare... make sense, so many connections to fucking Atlanta these days...
Title: Re: HAHAHAHA @ Tools afraid of flying..
Post by: Ursus on November 16, 2008, 04:23:56 PM
In Belfast?

Yes mate. So sad to see.