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Getbig Female Info Boards => Open Talk for Girl Discussion => Topic started by: Faust on January 09, 2009, 05:23:34 AM
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She broke up with me one week ago.
I didn't see this coming at all, and have been depressed a whole week now. Depression, dark thoughts, insomnia, ... Life feels like hell.
I didn't think i had feelings this deep for her.
I'm gonna go work abroad in six months so it would probably have ended there (thats what we agreed), but we said we wanted to have fun anyway while it lasts. But she was kinda sad about this and said she was wasting her time then, still things seemed to be going good.
We didn't see each other for two weeks (i was travelling) and we were talking on msn and she said that she is confused and that maybe she doesn't have deep feelings for me, and that it's best not to see each other again.
Maybe she is scared we will both get hurt more if we stay togheter longer and then break up. She has had a bad long distance relation already. I don't know if this is the reason though.
Can anyone tell me if i still have a chance to get her back? And tips how to do it?
At first i went kinda overboard, i said that i refused a breakup and i wanted to see her in person, but i think that scared her a bit. Now i'm letting it rest a couple of days. I'm thinking now i can offer her to try to be friend, and i hope she'll get feelings for me again...
I can't get her out of my mind. In an effort to do this i made a date with another girl tomorrow, but i don't know if i should even try with another girl as i clearly still have feelings for her ...
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If it was gonna end anyways in 6 months then let it go now.
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you probably dont really even like her that much, you said it yourself you didnt think your feelings where this deep...you always want what you cant have. At any rate i wouldnt try and become friends unless you actually want to be friends b/c you are probably just setting yourself up for more heart break.
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Little update:
I met the other girl at the cinema and we made out. Another complicated situation though, she's probably moving in 1,5 months or something. She said she wanted something real, not just to have a good time togheter. I don't know what she means by this because this is obviously all there will be. I don't know where this will go, might get the exact same situation.
Still thinking nonstop about my ex :'(
I wanna speak to her on msn, but i think she blocked me. Probably gonna give her a call at the start of the next week.
If it was gonna end anyways in 6 months then let it go now.
6 months is a long time. I'm early twenties, not looking to get married or anything. I just wanna be with the girl i have feelings for. I was actually considering trying a LDR or staying here for her, but i never told her this, i wanted to give it 2 more months and then see how i felt...
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I didn't think i had feelings this deep for her.
Faust, for some reason this stands out to me. Did you ever see the Seinfeld w/the "preemptive breakup?" George thought his woman was going to break up w/him and so he broke up w/her first. She was devastated and wanted to do anything to get him back...etc.
Are you sure it's her you really want? Sometimes when we can't have something we want it all the more.
Meanwhile, if she blocked you from her MSN I don't think I'd pursue her. I suppose you could always write her a letter about your feelings (but this could poss. come back to bite you one day) and make the offer that she can contact you if she wishes.
Sorry you're feeling down :(
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She broke up with me one week ago.
I didn't see this coming at all, and have been depressed a whole week now. Depression, dark thoughts, insomnia, ... Life feels like hell.
I didn't think i had feelings this deep for her.
I'm gonna go work abroad in six months so it would probably have ended there (thats what we agreed), but we said we wanted to have fun anyway while it lasts. But she was kinda sad about this and said she was wasting her time then, still things seemed to be going good.
We didn't see each other for two weeks (i was travelling) and we were talking on msn and she said that she is confused and that maybe she doesn't have deep feelings for me, and that it's best not to see each other again.
Maybe she is scared we will both get hurt more if we stay togheter longer and then break up. She has had a bad long distance relation already. I don't know if this is the reason though.
Can anyone tell me if i still have a chance to get her back? And tips how to do it?
At first i went kinda overboard, i said that i refused a breakup and i wanted to see her in person, but i think that scared her a bit. Now i'm letting it rest a couple of days. I'm thinking now i can offer her to try to be friend, and i hope she'll get feelings for me again...
I can't get her out of my mind. In an effort to do this i made a date with another girl tomorrow, but i don't know if i should even try with another girl as i clearly still have feelings for her ...
Get over it and move on. Find a hobby, like weightlifting, and put your effort into that instead of worrying about some broad that obviously doesn't want to deal with you (she blocked your MSN). Focus on getting into the second girls pants as an act of revenge, you'll feel better when you're done. Trust me. ;)
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Sucks now, but you'll get over it in time... Especially if you're in your early 20's.
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Stop being a wuss.
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camp out in front of her house with a clever disguise and pair of binoculars at all hours of the night and see what she's up to !
I think you deserve to know !
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camp out in front of her house with a clever disguise and pair of binoculars at all hours of the night and see what she's up to !
I think you deserve to know !
hahahah A buddy of mine woke up one morning with his ex parked in his driveway behind his car so he couldn't leave until he woke her up. ;D
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hahahah A buddy of mine woke up one morning with his ex parked in his driveway behind his car so he couldn't leave until he woke her up. ;D
years ago I had a buddy who's ex would'n let go,we'd be in a tavern shooting pool and pounding beers and she'd be parked outside across the street WITH THIER INFANT SON just sitting there waiting.....
I said Vince !,what the hell's linda doing out there ?
he's said "she's fucking psycho" ..... there's no place he ever went in town that she didn't do that !
weirdest thing I ever saw !
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years ago I had a buddy who's ex would'n let go,we'd be in a tavern shooting pool and pounding beers and she'd be parked outside across the street WITH THIER INFANT SON just sitting there waiting.....
I said Vince !,what the hell's linda doing out there ?
he's said "she's fucking psycho" ..... there's no place he ever went in town that she didn't do that !
weirdest thing I ever saw !
LOL!
Crazy chicks are great in bed but having kids with them is always a bad idea. You have to deal with them forever and might end up with crazy kids because of bad genetics. :)
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let her go. Besides you already made out with some one else and the fact that you don't know about her wanting it to be real or not is suggestive that you need to move on with your life. Her blocking you is a warning sign that she doesn't want you contacting her. Besides, in 6 months its over so why try to continue the pain. Unless you like pain, then that's a whole different issue.
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Alright, seems there is a concensus here.
I know it's probably stupid, but i'm gonna give it one more try though. At least i want to see her one last time, cause i think a breakup while chatting online is pretty sucky. I can't even see her face or judge her emotions.
At first she didn't really want a relation with me either (because it will end soon), but i knew she really liked me (her bodylanguage says a lot) so i convinced her at that time to give me a try.
After i've seen her once or twice and she still says its over i'll move on. My mind has gotten calmer lately, and i'm thinking less about her. But when i let myself go a bit the pain is right back.
camp out in front of her house with a clever disguise and pair of binoculars at all hours of the night and see what she's up to !
I think you deserve to know !
First days i was actually seriously thinking about going to her house to make her talk to me :-\
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Alright, seems there is a concensus here.
I know it's probably stupid, but i'm gonna give it one more try though. At least i want to see her one last time, cause i think a breakup while chatting online is pretty sucky. I can't even see her face or judge her emotions.
At first she didn't really want a relation with me either (because it will end soon), but i knew she really liked me (her bodylanguage says a lot) so i convinced her at that time to give me a try.
After i've seen her once or twice and she still says its over i'll move on. My mind has gotten calmer lately, and i'm thinking less about her. But when i let myself go a bit the pain is right back.
First days i was actually seriously thinking about going to her house to make her talk to me :-\
dude, seriously, let it go. Not see er one more time, or twice. drop it and go. All that will happen is some "Itld you i don't want to see you anymore, it hurts" blah blah, then she'll cry, you'll cry, she'll call you an asshole and jerk for seeing her after she told you not too and then you'll have that crappy feeling in the pit of your stomach and be all pissed off for a few more days.
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Alright, seems there is a concensus here.
I know it's probably stupid, but i'm gonna give it one more try though. At least i want to see her one last time, cause i think a breakup while chatting online is pretty sucky. I can't even see her face or judge her emotions.
At first she didn't really want a relation with me either (because it will end soon), but i knew she really liked me (her bodylanguage says a lot) so i convinced her at that time to give me a try.
After i've seen her once or twice and she still says its over i'll move on. My mind has gotten calmer lately, and i'm thinking less about her. But when i let myself go a bit the pain is right back.
First days i was actually seriously thinking about going to her house to make her talk to me :-\
Stop being stupid, man.
Guys do this kind of crap all the time. Because things don't end badly they create this fantasy girl who was let go too soon. People waste time keeping a relationship on life support because they're afraid of being alone for five minutes.
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STella is right (pre-emptive breakup).. you're in your early 20's, move on. Hope it all works out for you soon.
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STella is right (pre-emptive breakup).. you're in your early 20's, move on. Hope it all works out for you soon.
Stella is too nice, LOL!
He might have understood what agreeing to a specific date/time for a break-up means, from a woman's perspective, had she been more brutal. :)
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Stella is too nice, LOL!
He might have understood what agreeing to a specific date/time for a break-up means, from a woman's perspective, had she been more brutal. :)
exactly, drkaje.. she beat him to it..no point dwelling on it.. make the most of your 20's
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exactly, drkaje.. she beat him to it..no point dwelling on it.. make the most of your 20's
Someone else is probably already hitting it. (http://smiley.onegreatguy.net/bj.gif)
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Alright, seems there is a concensus here.
I know it's probably stupid, but i'm gonna give it one more try though. At least i want to see her one last time, cause i think a breakup while chatting online is pretty sucky. I can't even see her face or judge her emotions.
At first she didn't really want a relation with me either (because it will end soon), but i knew she really liked me (her bodylanguage says a lot) so i convinced her at that time to give me a try.
After i've seen her once or twice and she still says its over i'll move on. My mind has gotten calmer lately, and i'm thinking less about her. But when i let myself go a bit the pain is right back.
First days i was actually seriously thinking about going to her house to make her talk to me :-\
No. Just fuckin stop. Let it go. Have yourself a couple one night stands and you'll forget about it. Stalking her down is only going to build resentment and possibly a restraining order.
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Alright, seems there is a concensus here.
I know it's probably stupid, but i'm gonna give it one more try though. At least i want to see her one last time, cause i think a breakup while chatting online is pretty sucky. I can't even see her face or judge her emotions.
At first she didn't really want a relation with me either (because it will end soon), but i knew she really liked me (her bodylanguage says a lot) so i convinced her at that time to give me a try.
After i've seen her once or twice and she still says its over i'll move on. My mind has gotten calmer lately, and i'm thinking less about her. But when i let myself go a bit the pain is right back.
First days i was actually seriously thinking about going to her house to make her talk to me :-\
You're bitter that she burned you and you only want her back for this reason.
Respect her decision.
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No. Just fuckin stop. Let it go. Have yourself a couple one night stands and you'll forget about it. Stalking her down is only going to build resentment and possibly a restraining order.
The attention will also swell her head and make things difficult for the next guy to hit it.
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The attention will also swell her head and make things difficult for the next guy to hit it.
P.O.P Syndrome
P***y On Pedestal Syndrome
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P.O.P Syndrome
P***y On Pedestal Syndrome
She wouldn't be the first to suffer from this disease.
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or the last.. >:( :(
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or the last.. >:( :(
Don't blame them, Migsy.
It's our fault.
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then >:( >:( >:( >:( for the guys causing P.O.P Syndrome
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then >:( >:( >:( >:( for the guys causing P.O.P Syndrome
We can't blame women for our weaknesses. :)
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why not? they blame us for every thing.
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why not? they blame us for every thing.
Do you really want to be like them? :)
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why not? they blame us for every thing.
Do you really want to be like them? :)
You chicks are catty!
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Do you really want to be like them? :)
no..but damn it!
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You chicks are catty!
well when the girls are away the..nevermind it's not going to come out right lol.
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no..but damn it!
raar!!
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To the thread starter... go find a hottie to bang, you'll get over the ex really quickly.
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>:(
I picture myself as hotter if i were a chick. At least I hope so lol
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To the thread starter... go find a hottie to bang, you'll get over the ex really quickly.
There's nothing like new cooter. :)
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There's nothing like new cooter. :)
It is the best way to rid your desire for the "old" cooter.
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It is the best way to rid your desire for the "old" cooter.
Funny how that works.
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If you feel she is really that important then hell yeah give it another go, just talk to her, big chance that it doesn't work out, but atleast you've tried it. Remember after a while people generally regret the things that they didn't do...not the things they did.
It is absolutely possible to have 2nd talk with her without ending it in a big fight or making yourself look stupid. Don't be overly dramatic and be ready to accept a more definitive no. Screw honour and other sociocultural notions of alpha male behavior!
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I sent her a message a week ago or something to meet up and have a chat.
She said she would like to meet me but is "really busy", but she'll try hard for next week or the week after. I don't know, feels like she throws me away like some used tissue.
Haven't heard from her since. Def sure now she blocked me on msn. Was starting to feel a bit better, but got drunk one night and dropped back into sorrow for a couple of days afterwards.
Saw on her facebook that another guy is flirting with her (much like the way i did when we were togheter).
I invited the other chick (brasilian girl) that i kissed over at my place and we had sex.
Don't know how to feel now. Things are what they are i guess. I would still like to know exactly what made her break up with me, but i don't really want her back anymore (atm).
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I sent her a message a week ago or something to meet up and have a chat.
She said she would like to meet me but is "really busy", but she'll try hard for next week or the week after. I don't know, feels like she throws me away like some used tissue. You are officially old news to her, persue no further!
Haven't heard from her since. Def sure now she blocked me on msn. Was starting to feel a bit better, but got drunk one night and dropped back into sorrow for a couple of days afterwards. Refocus your energy into something more positive.
Saw on her facebook that another guy is flirting with her (much like the way i did when we were togheter). Stop going to facebook, another guy is already with it. Besides the more you check up on her the worse you will feel.
I invited the other chick (brasilian girl) that i kissed over at my place and we had sex. Good for you, check that off your bucket list. To make sure, hit it again.
Don't know how to feel now. Things are what they are i guess. I would still like to know exactly what made her break up with me, but i don't really want her back anymore (atm). No you don't, let it go. Not worth mulling over. All you will do is find fault in yourself and make her feel even worse. If by atm you mean ass to mouth, then hit up the brazilian chick again.
Seriously, move on, it's obvious she is.
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Alright, little update.
So with the brazilian chick i'm kinda in a weird situation. It's been longer than a week since i've seen her. I invited her over a couple of times but there's always something (or she's really tired, or she's working, now she has her period and doesn't feel well).
She has to take a long busride though to come here. We're chatting a bit on msn, and everything seems fine there. She's apologized for this and says she misses me.
Anyway, i was a bit fed up with this, i mean, in one month she's gonna leave so i don't wanna have a "relationship" solely on msn. I went out , got a bit drunk and i kissed another girl. :-\
She's a nice girl and somebody i can have fun with for the next months. I feel a bit weird cause i cheated in a way on the other chick, even though i don't know if you can consider it a "relationship". We'll see how it works out, i'm not stressing about it that much.
About my ex: I'm taking you guys advice and trying not to think about her at all. Its working reasonably. Sometimes i can't help it and i feel like shit for an hour. But everyday its a little better and i am just trying to keep my mind focussed on the present moment and not on the past. Going out and doing stuff, like flirting with girls ;D, definately helps to keep my mind off her.
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Maybe you would feel better if you and Brazil verbalized what you have. That may be the respectful thing to do. Maybe it's very casual to her and you are both open to date others?
And yes, time will make your break-up w/your ex less painful. At some point you may wonder why you dated her in the first place, but maybe not. Be strong Faust!!
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Maybe you would feel better if you and Brazil verbalized what you have. That may be the respectful thing to do. Maybe it's very casual to her and you are both open to date others?
And yes, time will make your break-up w/your ex less painful. At some point you may wonder why you dated her in the first place, but maybe not. Be strong Faust!!
Thanks Stella. Honestly, i feel a lot better. I don't even know why i was feeling so down at the start, thinking about it now, it's not even that bad. I was thinking why she was hurting me so much, but actually i was just hurting myself by obsessing over it. I liked her and we had a good time togheter but life goes on and "it aint that serious".
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Good attitude Faust!
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Faust, I think you should continue trying to see new girls but at the same time try to get this girl back. If you have moved on then it should be easier for you to get her back because you won't be acting obsessive or like a doormat so she will have more respect for you. Offer to hang out as friends, let her know casually that before she broke up with you you were planning on cancelling your 6-month work term or getting serious with her, possibly even proposing before you left. She might start having feelings for you again after realizing what she's missing. If that happens you can use her for sex and once she really gets strong enough feelings for you then it's time to get revenge on her for hurting you by dumping her or "letting" her catch you cheating on her or something.
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Maybe you would feel better if you and Brazil verbalized what you have. That may be the respectful thing to do. Maybe it's very casual to her and you are both open to date others?
I met with "Brazil" one more time this week. But i broke up with her today. I think it's best for both. I think i just was using her for making me feel better about myself / sex. She is a great girl and i don't want to hurt her in any way, i also don't wanna complicate my life even more by dating two girls at the same time. She is leaving soon to Brazil so its best for her i think to focus on that. She told me its ok and that she felt it coming (didn't tell her i kissed another girl cause that would just hurt her i think). I feel a bit sad but i think i made the right decision to do it as soon as possible and not wait till she leaves.
Faust, I think you should continue trying to see new girls but at the same time try to get this girl back. If you have moved on then it should be easier for you to get her back because you won't be acting obsessive or like a doormat so she will have more respect for you. Offer to hang out as friends, let her know casually that before she broke up with you you were planning on cancelling your 6-month work term or getting serious with her, possibly even proposing before you left. She might start having feelings for you again after realizing what she's missing. If that happens you can use her for sex and once she really gets strong enough feelings for you then it's time to get revenge on her for hurting you by dumping her or "letting" her catch you cheating on her or something.
Thanks for the advice bob, but i mean her no harm. I had played with ideas like this at first, or by spreading some of her secrets etc. But this will do no good and just bring more negativity in her and my life.
I am gonna just go out with the girl i kissed last. I'm gonna go slow to avoid drama and see where it takes me and her.
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Faust you seem like a nice and thoughtful person :)
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Faust Bigbobs you seem like a nice and thoughtful person :)
Fixed? :-\
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Fixed? :-\
;D
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There are a couple of old sayings that apply here
"the best way to get over a girl is to get on top of another one"
" I wouldn't worry about her cuz she ain't worried about you"
Personally i think saying NO.1 is total crap. If you lose someone you truly love the only thing that will help is time.And having the willpower to STAY AWAY. My personal formula is it takes exactly 1/2 the time you were in the relationship to REALLY get over the person, no matter what (or who) you do. it is 100% accurate.
Saying NO.2 is the dead ass truth........you will tear yourself up wondering what she's doing, who she's with.....etc. Just worry about yourself and move on.
I was going to say "just assume the worst and move on" but that's an unfair statement. Contrary to what 99.9% of all GetBiggers will tell you, not all women are pigs that will fuck anyone with a cock. Sure, they are out there, but not as many as these guys wish ;D
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Was just a temporary thing post break up feelings Faust, move on - as you appear to be doing.
All my time round here posting with you, you seem a really nice, interesting and amusing guy - I am sure you have no issues attracting women [unless you secretly weigh 500lbs and resemble a frog in which case strike my comments ;D] so many more will come. By this time next month you will be good to go. Time heals.
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There are a couple of old sayings that apply here
"the best way to get over a girl is to get on top of another one"
" I wouldn't worry about her cuz she ain't worried about you"
Personally i think saying NO.1 is total crap. If you lose someone you truly love the only thing that will help is time.And having the willpower to STAY AWAY. My personal formula is it takes exactly 1/2 the time you were in the relationship to REALLY get over the person, no matter what (or who) you do. it is 100% accurate.
Saying NO.2 is the dead ass truth........you will tear yourself up wondering what she's doing, who she's with.....etc. Just worry about yourself and move on.
I was going to say "just assume the worst and move on" but that's an unfair statement. Contrary to what 99.9% of all GetBiggers will tell you, not all women are pigs that will fuck anyone with a cock. Sure, they are out there, but not as many as these guys wish ;D
Never doubt the power of new cooter. >:(
It's jumping into a new relationship people should avoid. :)
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Thanks for the input guys. Feeling a lot better. I bumped into her on the street, but she told me she was happy to see me, but she didn't have time cause she was late for a doctor's appointment. But she would send me an email soon. Still haven't gotten anything from her, but whatever. I'm doing alright now, working out some issues, started working out again as well. I'm dating the other chick now. It's going pretty slow but i'm not in a rush.
Here's something i read which hit home:
We've all probably had our hearts broken in one time or another. We all know that feeling like you can't go on. Life seems meaningless. You feel like you'll never find another one like her. You can't eat, can't sleep. Blah, blah, blah. There is absolutely no reason to PUT YOURSELF THROUGH this kind of torture. That's exactly what you're doing. Torturing yourself, degrading yourself, and then coming back for more. A Man doesn't do that.
Why doesn't she want to go out with you? It doesn't matter, and it will be far more trouble than it's worth to find out. All you know is that she doesn't. So... NEXT!
The best revenge ever on the ex that dumped you is simply LIVING WELL. Living your life to the best capability. What a slap in the face it would be for your ex to run into you down the road and there you are, better than you've ever been! Kicking ass on the rest of the world. Kind of like "Thanks for dumping me, because look at me now!"
You've got a new and improved girlfriend, better job, new car, new clothes, you look great. Now you'll say "But, shouldn't we be doing all that stuff anyway?" EXACTLY. That is the beauty of it. And without her on your mind you'll have more time and focus to do this. Sure, itt's going to take some TIME, but the less time you waste the better.
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hahahaha @ the male brain
Listening particle ;D
Toilet aiming cell ;D
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hahahaha @ the male brain
Listening particle ;D
Toilet aiming cell ;D
I have siad, "If a woman can fake a orgasm, then a man can pretend being interested", it takes some training.