I've only done baby cycles in the past, played with TRT. Nothing even worth mentioning. This time around I decided to step it up a notch quite a bit for me. Muscle gains have been great. Strength is great. I honestly am nothing amazing to look at but you can tell I do my swiss ball squats. I really honestly enjoy training. It forces me to not eat shit and gives me an outlet. Like some have said, its better than booze and narcotics, neither of which I even think about now. For the first time in my life I do not want to drink, even socially. Weed? If anyone has read anything I've written, they know my view on that. But I gotta tell ya, when i walk around out in public I love the feeling of confidence you get when 'on'. It makes me understand why guys never want to come off. 'Off' I hate going anywhere in public. Maybe that's the oldman taking over. But 'on'? I'll walk right into the busiest mall on the busiest day and I don't give a fuck. It doesn't annoy me. I will walk right up to anyone and ask a question where as before I would just keep to myself and get in and get the fuck out. I don't mind going to the grocery store at all anymore cuz now I need to feed my body, and so what I buying a bunch of steaks, eggs, and pineapple juice lol. It's weird the mental changes. For me that's the best part. I can't wait to lift and eat now cuz I get to actually see progress! And my favorite part is with the females. Normally I'm the quiet gentleman, but now I'm right in their face and I say whatever I want to them. Just flirting shit. So now I see the conundrum with using gear.