OK, few questions. First, how can you listen to Metallica and study anything? I have never believed in listening to music (even classical) while studying, but Metallica?
Depends on the type of work, I prefer absolute silence when studying, classical-jazz for working on assignments, but when i'm just putting the last pieces together whatever bides the time.
I've learned to except that allowing productivity to slump is healthier.
On a more serious note. when you say
What do you mean? You said you were a mess, do you mean an addict or what? Just curious cos when I recall past times when I went out, fucked all and sundry and did crazy shit I get a rush in my heart and it can unsettle me for the rest of the day.
Just falling apart due to not knowing I had aspergers. Depression, drinking just to have friends, single, anxiety, fucking up in school and work.
Being autistic is kinda like trying to run at full speeds wearing night vision goggles.
Your aware of your surroundings, but certain details your missing. Once I was aware of my own tunnel vision things got alot better.
As for shit you get too old for what do you mean here? Some girl opposite me on train tonight kept staring me out of it. She started writing out details on a piece of paper (she was fairly hot - 7.5/10) and I was thinking "jeez you're (me) gonna get propositioned here". Turns out it was her address etc for a suitcase tag she was writing. Been a while since I have been on market so felt like I was past it cos that's how you used to exchange details. (Turns out she did want me and gave me details at end of train journey) I hardly ever go out anymore either, used to go out 3+ times/week, guess I'm just getting old... or resigned 
Well I'm autistic, certain things are basically a waste of time.
I'm not totally opposed to relationships, but its not worth my time to sync alot of time and effort into it. The reality is most girls bore the living hell out of me. I.e. Can't watch tv to save my life. I don't care about my apartment, etc.
I live a streamlined life, and I can't afford to take on burdens I don't need.
I'm in that place now, started a course this week and it appeals to me so maybe that's what I'm supposed to do. Don't believe in destiny but do believe we all have a few callings. Don't give up on finding something that makes you money that you like just cos you feel you're getting older. I turned 30 in Feb and was depressed for couple of months at why I wasn't doing better than Mark Zuckerberg.
Ironically Zuckerberg is clearly autistic. I get comfort in knowing even if I had billions of dollars, I would still be wearing my pizza stained hoodies. One of the main positives of autism is you really get bored quickly with material things. Girls, Money, Cars, clothes, homes etc. It obviously inhibits your ability to have a stable life, in the eyes of mainstream society, however at the same time, it forces use to live independently of the mainstream.
But yeah I'm committed to only doing things that interest me. If your autistic, working for a pay cheque is not remotely an option.
I'm happy and productive when doing something that gets my attention.
