telemarketers

[Clubber Lang]

some people think you should be polite to them because they have a shitty job, but their job is to bother you at home or on your cell so i say fuck em

i always just pick up the phone and tell them to fuckoff or put them on hold for a while but id like to try something more entertaining ... anyone have any funny stories about fucking with them ??

[Camel Jockey]

some people think you should be polite to them because they have a shitty job, but their job is to bother you at home or on your cell so i say f**k em

i always just pick up the phone and tell them to fuckoff or put them on hold for a while but id like to try something more entertaining ... anyone have any funny stories about fucking with them ??

This one telemarketer with an ebonics accent was annoying the hell out of me. I insisted I did not want dilivery of a shitty paper like the New York Post, he kept insisting it was a great deal and he was also being rude and condescending. I told him "SORRY! I DON'T SPEAK EBONICS! SO FUCK OFF PLEASE!"

I held on to the phone for a few seconds and he was silent, then I hung up.

[Diesel1]

some people think you should be polite to them because they have a shitty job, but their job is to bother you at home or on your cell so i say f**k em

i always just pick up the phone and tell them to fuckoff or put them on hold for a while but id like to try something more entertaining ... anyone have any funny stories about fucking with them ??

Why give them grieve? just politely say 'no thank you' and put the phone down.

For a little fun you could maybe talk back in an indian accent.


I used to go through the classified ads and phone people up talking in a heavy paki accent. Say if they were selling jack russel pups then I would ask for mr 'jack russell' They would try and explain that the dogs were jack russells, but I would insist to speak to mr jack russell. The phone would always get slammed down when I asked how good their dogs tasted.

If some twat was selling a garden shed I would ask if it was carpeted and could I move in straight away with my wife and kids.. you get the idea.

Oh the craziness of youth how I miss thee

[Clubber Lang]

thats kinda tame. when i was young i remember one time my friend called somone who posted a missing pet flyer and told her she had ran over her pet. i rememebr more clearly after him saying "and other cats are eatin its dead body"


we were so young then

[Camel Jockey]

When I was young I used to call a drug and alcohol helpline for fun. Used to piss off those people really good. 

[2lean]

This is my favorite, a long time ago before I got caller id and on the no call list, usually the first thing a telemarketer will say after they either ask for you or the head of the household, is how are you doing?  So I told them, I lost my job, my husband ran off with a bimbo, my oldest son was arrested and put in jail on trumped up charges, I am in a court fight with my neighbor over property lines.  I went to the doctor and not only is my blood pressure up but had this horrible cold. Turns out it was pneumonia and he wanted to put me in the hospital.  But I couldn't go since I lost my job, I don't have health insurance and not even sure how I was going to pay him.

Before I knew it the person on the other end hung up before I could continue on.  That's what they get when they ask "How are you today?"

BTW, this works almost all the time.  One time it didn't but I do think the person on the other end didn't have too much in the way of brains because she asked me to buy something.  I asked her what didn't she understand about me not having a job and no money.  She didn't get it so I told her no thanks and hung up.  Oh well, so much for the fun!

Since in my state we have a no call list, I have noticed it has cut out these calls considerably.  If by chance one does get through, I politely thank them for calling and tell them that as of this date and time I am officially requesting they remove my name from their calling list.  If they refuse and I do get any future calls from this company, they will be reported to the state's attorney general's office.  That usually stops future calls.