Dave to Katie: "So this must be a very exciting time for you. You're in love with Tom Cruise, and Tom, as far as we can tell, has gone nuts."
- David Letterman to Katie Holmes on the Late Show
"Dear Tom Cruise,
Your lack of belief in the existence of clinical depression tells me one thing: you didn’t spend $10. to see War Of The Worlds. If vitamins can possibly help me out of this spiraling funk, please let me know which ones. Dinos? Pebbles? Freds? Please, I’m crying out for help."
- Alton Brown, Food Network host of Good Eats and Iron Chef America
"Note to Tom Cruise: You are maxing out. Wearing out the welcome. Becoming less the tolerable and moderately talented and mildly likable megastar and more like an itchy boil on the deranged ferret of popular culture, requiring lancing."
- Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
"Fame is like death: We will never know what it looks like until we've reached the other side. Then it will be impossible to describe and no one will believe you if you try. For now, all the conjecture is on our side of the media fence. And lately it has put Tom Cruise one spoke behind Michael Jackson on the freak wheel."
- Sloane Crosley, Village Voice
"If vitamins and exercise alone explain why Tom Cruise is so, um, knowledgeable and well-grounded, pass the Prozac."
- Chicago Tribune
"It's a sign of the celebrity-market bubble that a bona fide, top-gun movie star has to make such a spectacle of himself just to stand out from the crowd. There's such a glut of celebrities that they'll soon have to begin storing the surplus in silos in Iowa."
- Eugene Robinson, Washington Post.
"Whether we can still suspend disbelief, or whether all we can think about while watching him act is L. Ron Hubbard and Oprah will be measured by his movie's grosses."
- Marty Kaplan, Professor of Communications, University of Southern California.
"Tom and Katie got engaged on Friday and, once again, the media somehow found out about it. If we promise to go see 'War of the Worlds,' will you please make this stop?"
- Jimmy Kimmel
"His true believer zeal is in-your-face in every single interview now. Haven't we already been through this with Mel Gibson?"
- Paige Newman, Movies Editor, MSNBC
"Is it fair to expect Cruise to behave "normal"? When you're surrounded by yes-men telling you that every decision you make is correct — and have the millions to prove it — how could you possibly be expected to be normal? Just ask Michael Jackson."
- Paige Newman
"I'll never quite be able to see Cruise the same way. It will take more than Cruise's power of positive thinking to bring back the nice guy with the megawatt smile. Now, he's the zealot who jumps on Oprah's couch like a love-crazed monkey and lectures America about our nasty pharmaceutical habits."
- Paige Newman.
"Do whatever you have to to never have a heart attack around Tom Cruise, cause he would just use his medical expertise to put some duct tape on your chest and give you some gumdrops. And then he would convince you that the defibrillator and paramedics who later saved your life really didn't save your life. Just like people who improve on meds like Stratera and Ritalin haven't really improved on meds like Stratera and Ritalin."
- The Superficial.com
"His extreme bliss about brand-new girl-pal Katie Holmes was awkward and forced and just really weird. Yet you gave him a pass by not following up when he wouldn't really explain how he and Katie met or when he basically said he hadn't noticed his child was biracial or when he just laughed for five minutes straight. And finally, you didn't ask, "Why the hell are you jumping around like a crazy person, Tom?"
- E Online
