Author Topic: Bodybuilding poetry...  (Read 8788 times)

BuffGoddess

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Bodybuilding poetry...
« on: January 22, 2007, 12:33:04 AM »
So here's one of my favorites I wrote a while back, been published and all but thought I would share it with the ladies and gentlemen of this board...

Dishes Can Wait

Fresh from the gym
The manly scent of him
Fills my head with visions
Of pumping iron and repetitions
Muscled bulging, veins popping
Heaving, grunting, rarely stopping
Forced reps and pumped pecs
Glistening with beads of sweat
Lats and Traps, Bis and Tris
Striations appear before my eyes
Perfect glutes, carved hamstrings
Shredded abs finish the scene
The perfection of him, surpassing Adonis
This woman proud to be his goddess
I'm standing here, doing dishes
He comes from behind, with hugs and kisses
His body still damp from the shower
I think the dishes can wait an hour...


BuffGoddess

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #1 on: January 22, 2007, 10:31:28 AM »
I love it...and want it!
Jennifer

ToxicAvenger

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #2 on: January 22, 2007, 12:23:42 PM »
carpe` vaginum!

ToxicAvenger

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #3 on: January 22, 2007, 12:31:00 PM »
SQUATS : peter spiro

Here is not where men and boys are separated
but where the ordinary becomes audacious,
where summer storms turn into tornadoes.. And if we talk
in terms of weather, then this is the weightlifter’s hurricane,
quads and calves like turbulent gusts of muscle whipped
around the eye of the knee.
You step up to the rack, square off facing a cracked plaster wall
or a mirror hung there to display what will soon be
your face in a grimace of agony.
Grip the bar, lean into it, bend the neck till the head
slips under and you feel the cold steel across your shoulders.
Dig in beneath the weight, measure each breath, straighten slowly
as you lift it off the rack; step back, stand for a moment
to ensure the bar’s securely balanced. Now squat.
Each quad fills with a rush of blood then swells as you start to stand.
Straight up, back tight, head and neck stiff, as if
you were skewered through form heel to forehead, the rump
like a linchpin to control the flow of motion;
down again, then up, your butt
the hub upon which the hips ride, cycling
each rise and dip, knees wrapped tightly to avoid a buckle.
When each thigh is painfully inflamed
the warm-up ends and the work gets real.
You’ve crossed  a border from civil inhibition
to a frontier of fear where your sequestered animals
feast on your deep silent secrets.
Up and down in maddening dance,
each repetition pulling you farther form the edge
of that frontier you are now swooping through
like a crazed hawk, flashing and slashing around
sheared cliffs glazed with the blades of a midday sun.
A gust of wind, as if form great wings beating, and you’re lifted
above some steep face of rock, sweeping the sky like a blare
sent up form fields resembling golden sponges.
You’ve crashed the gate, slipped silently through
some dark portal where you hear your own breathing, though
somehow you know you’re not in control. You’re unconscious
but you’re still squatting.
carpe` vaginum!

BigCypriate

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #4 on: January 24, 2007, 01:57:31 AM »
So here's one of my favorites I wrote a while back, been published and all but thought I would share it with the ladies and gentlemen of this board...

Dishes Can Wait

Fresh from the gym
The manly scent of him
Fills my head with visions
Of pumping iron and repetitions
Muscled bulging, veins popping
Heaving, grunting, rarely stopping
Forced reps and pumped pecs
Glistening with beads of sweat
Lats and Traps, Bis and Tris
Striations appear before my eyes
Perfect glutes, carved hamstrings
Shredded abs finish the scene
The perfection of him, surpassing Adonis
This woman proud to be his goddess
I'm standing here, doing dishes
He comes from behind, with hugs and kisses
His body still damp from the shower
I think the dishes can wait an hour...


BuffGoddess

Does Alex23 always do the dishes Buffgoddess?

GoneAway

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #5 on: January 24, 2007, 07:55:36 AM »
Great poem, BuffGoddess, but now you have dishes to wash.

Don't make me get the belt.

BigCypriate

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #6 on: January 26, 2007, 04:26:58 AM »
This is my latest BB poem,

I called it "You dont have to be a genius to spot Buffgoddess' penis"


The sound of steel, kissing the hooks on the squat rack
Had now stopped completely, as the last couple of guys walked painfully
Back to the changing room.
I forced one last shaky rep on the leg press, let out a disturbingly hot fart
And finished the last mouthful of my isotonic companion.

That's when I saw the shadow.
Slowly moving across the cracked plaster wall, enveloping the light as it swooped.
I had to force every once of courage left inside me to look at the source of this eagle of darkness,
Nothing could have prepared me for the horror, now in my line of sight.
It moved quickly across the gym floor, tidying up 45 plates as if they were disposable paper ones.
As the horror moved towards the leg equipment, I could see that it had managed to steal a jumper with 'fitness instructor' printed on the front to conceal its real monstrous identity.
As the figure moved towards me, I could see a huge bulge in it's shorts, so I pulled the drawstring on my sweats as tight as I could.
It spoke three words in a low gruff tone.
"We're..... closing...... now"
My fear quickly dissolved as I realised it was just the 'girl' from the counter I had greeted only 1 hour ago.
"Im done here" I replied.
"Can I ask you a question though?"
"Why do wear spandex when you have such a big penoris?"
"You dont have to be a genius", 'she' replied, "to see my penis."


Mr Gethin

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #7 on: January 26, 2007, 08:25:09 AM »
SQUATS : peter spiro

Here is not where men and boys are separated
but where the ordinary becomes audacious,
where summer storms turn into tornadoes.. And if we talk
in terms of weather, then this is the weightlifter’s hurricane,
quads and calves like turbulent gusts of muscle whipped
around the eye of the knee.
You step up to the rack, square off facing a cracked plaster wall
or a mirror hung there to display what will soon be
your face in a grimace of agony.
Grip the bar, lean into it, bend the neck till the head
slips under and you feel the cold steel across your shoulders.
Dig in beneath the weight, measure each breath, straighten slowly
as you lift it off the rack; step back, stand for a moment
to ensure the bar’s securely balanced. Now squat.
Each quad fills with a rush of blood then swells as you start to stand.
Straight up, back tight, head and neck stiff, as if
you were skewered through form heel to forehead, the rump
like a linchpin to control the flow of motion;
down again, then up, your butt
the hub upon which the hips ride, cycling
each rise and dip, knees wrapped tightly to avoid a buckle.
When each thigh is painfully inflamed
the warm-up ends and the work gets real.
You’ve crossed  a border from civil inhibition
to a frontier of fear where your sequestered animals
feast on your deep silent secrets.
Up and down in maddening dance,
each repetition pulling you farther form the edge
of that frontier you are now swooping through
like a crazed hawk, flashing and slashing around
sheared cliffs glazed with the blades of a midday sun.
A gust of wind, as if form great wings beating, and you’re lifted
above some steep face of rock, sweeping the sky like a blare
sent up form fields resembling golden sponges.
You’ve crashed the gate, slipped silently through
some dark portal where you hear your own breathing, though
somehow you know you’re not in control. You’re unconscious
but you’re still squatting.


Has this been published?

www.kagedmuscle.com
Deputy Editor

ToxicAvenger

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #8 on: January 30, 2007, 10:10:50 AM »

i remembered the authors name and the poem ws in flex a long time ago..like more than 7 yrs ago..soo i dug it up..

if you mean published in a poetry rag..i have no clue..
carpe` vaginum!

Deadpool

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #9 on: February 13, 2007, 05:12:11 PM »
way down the road in a gym far away
a young man was once overheard to say
I've repped so high and I have also repped low,
and no matter what, my legs just won't grow

I've tried leg extentions, leg curls, and leg presses too.
Oh, trying to cheat, sissy workouts he'd do
From the corner of the gym where the big ones train,
was a cloud of chalk and the air of pain

Where the big iron rides high and threatens lives,
where the noise is the clank of the big 45's
a fierce voice bellowed as she wrapped her knees
a really fit sister with legs like trees

Laughing as she snatched another plate from the rack
Chalking her hands and her V tapered back.
She said,"Stop lying, don't pretend you've forgotten.
The reason you don't grow is you haven't been SQUATTIN'!'
X

bigguns175

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #10 on: February 13, 2007, 07:20:59 PM »
nice one med, pretty sweet poem

Deadpool

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Re: Bodybuilding poetry...
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2007, 10:16:01 AM »
thanks, that is similar to the one with the link above, I think I first read it in Flex magazine
X