Long boring fucking post. 
Siouxcountry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahaha oh brother, I bet you're the kind of 'guy' who spends an incredible amount of time, money and energy from your pathetic life to get real close to Melissa D until one day she asks you if there's anything that she can do for you. And when she does, you excitedly say, "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to get in your bed, right now!", go back to her place, and before she can say or do anything, get naked and get on all fours on her bed and turns back, looks at her and says, "And now, can you use that machine on me? I've waited a really long time to see what it feels like, to have that bad boy tickling my prostrate. And don't worry, I'm already lubed up and good to go. Chop chop now" and close your eyes tightly in anticipation. Hahahahahahahaha gayer than Mike Arvilla's abs and thigh pose.