epic fails all around the place 
Mr. computer wizard
Alex23 is a better looking person than you and probably has nailed more HOT ladies than you would ever hope to. He's got a freewheeling personality and makes good coin. He's also very big. You are very tall and lanky.
Put on some weight, get a degree, a well paying job in a good field and we can start comparisons with Alex in a few years.
You aren't even in the same conversation with Alex23 right now.