Carlin is great.
I also like Bill Hicks. Here's one of his bits on abortion:
Bill Hicks: You know who’s really bugging me these days. These pro-lifers … Smattering of applause.
Bill: You ever look at their faces? ‘I’m pro-life!’ (Bill makes a pinched face of hate and fear, his lips are pursed as though he’s just sucked on a lemon.)
Bill: ‘I’m pro-life!’ Boy, they look it don’t they? They just exude joie de vivre. You just want to hang with them and play Trivial Pursuit all night long. Audience chuckles.
Bill: You know what bugs me about them? If you’re so pro-life, do me a favour - don’t lock arms and block medical clinics. If you’re so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries. Audience laughs.
Bill: Let’s see how committed you are to this idea. (Bill mimes the pursed lipped pro-lifers locking arms.)
Bill: (as pro-lifer) She can’t come in! Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) She was 98. She was hit by a bus! Audience laughs. Bill: (as pro-lifer) There’s options! Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) What else can we do? Have her stuffed? Audience laughs.
Bill: I want to see pro-lifers with crowbars at funerals opening caskets - ‘get out!’ Then I’d be really impressed by their mission. Audience laughs and applauds.
I don't care which side of the abortion fence you fall on, that's funny.
