That's exactly why he doesn't want to meet up- his "mystique" will be ruined. He will be seen as whatever he may be-fat, skinny, weak strong etc...And that's why he is backing out. To SF, his net persona is far more important, hence his 17k+ posts.
While I initially thought this was the case, I suspended my judgement when he said we should meet. He said something like "I'm a regular guy, laid back, off of the forums". So I took him at his word.
Turns out, he really does take his persona seriously enough that he's worried that he'll be outed. All these nancy's calling me gay are probably the same type of insignificant, anti-social shut ins.